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The Prince Is What??

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My grandfather is a farmer. He lives in a small village in the Middle East. He’s 90 years old. He never went to school when he was a child, he had to work. He doesn’t know how a glass of wine tastes, doesn’t know what the Internet is, doesn’t know who the president of his country is. He never left his land. He actually did, just once, when I was a child, he came to the West to meet us. My father tells him all the time he’s old now, he shouldn’t work anymore. But he says that’s the only thing he has in his life: if someone were to deprive him of his work, his life probably wouldn’t make sense. He’s a gentle man, he’s always kind to everyone, he lived in so many different circumstances and he can fit in any situation; he’s pure. But, nowadays, I understand he isn’t able to fit in the world we are living in anymore. He knows everything about the past, but nothing about the present. If you were to ask him what a homosexual is, he probably wouldn’t know the answer. The farmer is the vital figure of our society: he’s the basic worker. That’s what politicians should talk about: rural economy.

From my grandfather’s generation to my generation, many things changed in my family. I travel by plane four times a month. He did just once in his lifetime. Anyway, during my last trip I found a magazine in the compartment in front of my seat. The title was Prince Charles is gay!

I read the feature story. Dammit! That’s really shocking!

I’m shocked by the fact that magazines even think about making profits with such a trivial story.  I’m shocked by Camilla’s flood of tears, “I’m afraid I’ll never become The Queen.”  I’m disgusted by the people who are interested in this story.

The Royal Family’s position has no constitutional validity, so we can’t even define Prince Charles as a diplomat.  People out there live with real problems, but somebody had the good fortune to be a Duchess and is still not pleased by what chance gave her.

By the way, they say Julius Caesar was homosexual; The Roman soldiers used to call him “Rome’s Queen”. As you can see, this is not what people retain. If you do something great in your lifetime, you will be remembered for the good things you did. You should be worried by what they say about you just in case you are doing nothing else in your life, which is Prince Charles’ case. But he shouldn’t be concerned about it because he probably would not be remembered at all. Of course my sons won’t know about him. I don’t talk about useless people, I don’t talk if not needed, I don’t talk just to exercise my diaphragm, even if I am doing it now.

The Prince Is gay?  Who cares?

Just for the dummies who still do not understand who I’m talking about: the gay Prince is the man on the left:

Not the man on the right:








Or at least, he’s not the gay prince this article’s about!

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  • zingzing

    “Prince’s image was all about androgyny.”

    yep. and “if i was your girlfriend” was about his idea that if he was a woman, his girlfriend would be more open with him. gender-fucking was just one part of his game. you’ve got to understand the woman, or at least try to. but he’s never saying he wants to sleep with a man* (although he wouldn’t mind being a woman if it meant he could sleep with a woman, so i guess you could get from there to “gay,” although i’d bet that’s not what our friendly author was trying to say).

    *”when you were mine” kind of gets close, although he’s only saying he’d sleep with his ex immediately after her new man was done screwing her, although that may be taking the lyrics a little too literally. the man’s a nuanced songwriter, but obviously straight, even if he is twisted.

  • personally i call it nosassmartasyouthinkblogging. it’s really not clear what you are going for at all.

  • Hold on, zing. You’re not being fair. For Christ’s sake, look at the photograph of His Purple Highness at the bottom right on page two of this article. I don’t care how much of a stud he was, Prince’s image was all about androgyny. On one of his earliest breakout crossover hits, “I Wanna Be Your Lover,” the androgyne affirms, “I wanna be your brother,” but compounds our bewilderment by adding, “I wanna be your mother and your sister, too.”

  • zingzing

    sorry to break it to you, but prince (the musician) is most definitely a ladies’ man. have you ever listened to his music? man loves the ladies. he’s very comfortable with his sexuality, which may lead you to believe he’s gay, as he likes to flaunt it, and flaunting it has somehow become some sort of gay signifier. not that it is. but anyone who gives a moment of thought will come to the other conclusion. just one moment.

    seriously, this article is about a tabloid article. pathetic “journalism” only has only made this more pathetic. you should be ashamed for thinking this is real news, as well as for being a bigot for no good reason.

    whoever greenlighted this article needs a punch.

  • Lemme see if I’ve got this straight.

    New style of blogging … new way of writing … common denominator: Figurative Senses.

    “Will make you ponder mostly about notions I’ll only hint you.”

    Up first: a satire about HRH The Prince of Wales.

    Or, rather, about a tabloid article called “Prince Charles Is Gay!”

    Not that you would buy this rag or anything so vulgar. You found it on a plane.

    Nevertheless, you read it and were shocked.

    Not by the prospect of a Gay Prince. Rather, “by the fact that magazines even think about making profits with such a trivial story.”

    Personally, you’re disgusted by people who are interested in this story.

    Personally, you don’t talk about useless people, “even if I am doing it now.”

    “The Prince is gay?” you write. “Who cares?”

    Certainly not you. That’s why you wrote a 527-word blog about it.

    Certainly not me. That’s why I wrote a 270-word comment about your 527-word blog.

    So why does it feel like you’ve wasted my time? Perhaps because I haven’t the foggiest idea what you mean by “Figurative Senses.” Sounds deep. I’m dumb.

    And why am I not pondering about notions at which you’ve hinted? Whatever hints you dispensed, I missed. Again, I’m dumb. And useless, of course.

    What I am left to ponder is that SnuffWords is neither a new style of blogging nor a new way of writing. It’s an old way of blowing smoke. It hints at nothing, serves no purpose, and fits comfortably on my list of Top 10 Things to Avoid from Here On Out.

    Have I got that straight now?