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The Picture “Dick” Cheney Doesn’t Want You to See

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First Infamous Cheney Pic to Hit the Blogosphere

It was with hesitation that I decided to post this picture of our Vice President Dick Cheney.

When the picture was first published it caused a furor. Cheney himself asked that reporters not use the picture.

He is, as one can plainly see, fully clothed. The clothes, ahem, do not hide certain Cheney characteristics that are hard to ignore.

Now the picture is floating all around the Blogosphere and it’s time it be posted to Blogcritics that it be memorialized forever.

To those who think the VP isn’t a real man, well check out, softly and don’t be too obvious, the area between Cheney’s legs.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

More pics of week HERE

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About pat fish

  • http://journals.aol.com/vicl04/VictorLanasINADARKTIME/ Victor Lana

    All I can say is that it’s reassuring that DICK, our ersatz Commander in Briefs, lives up to his name.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    This is icky. I don’t like stuff like this. Please don’t do it again.

    This is almost as stupid a moment in our political discourse as the similarly idiotic burbling about Bush’s infamous “Mission Accomplished” dress-up flight suit, complete with bunched up parachute package. Oooooh, the nation’s leaders are so well hung! It sickens me that any person, no matter how apolitical, would resort to the basest fetishism of authority. I generally like Maureen Dowd, but I think even a good writer like her easily falls into this sort of mindless potty talk discussion of politicians. I got so sick of hearing Maureen talk about how much more “macho” Bush was than Kerry in her coy, Manhattan darling oh-so-cutesy dialect that I wanted to yell at her to go sleep with Bush already and get it out of her system. Dingy broads. If you’re a guy and you’re checking out Presidential package, you’re beyond help.

    Keep in mind Dick Cheney is morbidly obese and he has VERY thick thighs and protrusions of fat that wouldn’t be found in a normal body.

    That is all.

  • Nancy

    Eeeeeeewwwwwww…enough to make me lose my lunch. However, much as I despise Cheney, Bob, I have to disagree that he’s morbidly obese. A little heavy, perhaps, but not morbidly obese. But I do think he needs to switch from boxers to jockeys.

  • Eric Olsen

    Sticky Fingers is brought to mind

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Nancy, baby, he’s had a BAZILLION heart surgeries. His cholesterol is higher than Courtney Love. His obesity is threatening his very survival. He may not weigh 300 pounds, but weighing 250 pounds and having multiple bypasses doesn’t seem like a recipe for health.

    That is all.

  • Nancy

    Bob, I go by pictures of him. He’s overweight, yes, but not morbidly obese. As for health, well, IMO the sooner he kicks off the better, & I’m sure his soul will go straight to hell where it belongs. Yeah – he’s too heavy for his optimum health, but he’s not morbidly obese. Altho this argument is stupid, because I really can’t stand him and don’t give a rat’s ass if he’s healthy or not.

    Eric – what is sticky fingers? Thanks.

  • RosieL

    What you see is not what you *think* you see. *DEPENDS*….maybe the fit isn’t so good. (Hey, he’s not the only old guy to have to wear them.)

  • Eric Olsen

    damn, good point Rosie

  • http://www.magicjunk.com/blog/ Mark Sahm

    That picture gives hope to Ron Jeremy running for political office.

  • Nancy

    If it isn’t what we think it is, then what else could it be? A roll of thigh fat? I don’t think so….

  • http://www.magicjunk.com/blog/ Mark Sahm

    Ever see The Breakfast Club? Maybe Cheney was hiding his “doobage” there.

  • http://wisdomandmurder.blogspot.com Lisa McKay

    Perhaps he’s like the Conjoined Fetus Lady on South Park.

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    After experiencing this Dick Cheney is my hero.

  • hah

    The picture is way too dark for me to see anything except for his smiling face. It’s hard for me to believe that he can crack a smile.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Rosie’s a genius. I didn’t think of that. It could be that his Depends shifted or bunched up, hence the request from his staff. Incontinence is fairly common for a man his age.

    That’s a better theory than the penis one. Whose penis is shaped like that anyway? That’s not a penis, you simps.

    Nancy: you shouldn’t wish bad health on anyone, no matter how bad they are at governing.

    That is all.

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    Good Lord…

    I’d be all smiles if my pants fit like that! ;-P

  • MCH

    Remember Charles Durning’s role in “Best Little Whorehouse in Texas”?

    “Boots…hat…sock…”

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Man, RJ loves him some penis.

    Just kidding, pal.

    That is all.

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    We finally have the proof we need that Dick’s got balls and everyone’s got their panty hose in a bunch! Geesh.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Worst thread of discussion ever.

    My breakfast burrito is rapidly congealing. I am Jeff Albertson.

    That is all.

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    How much cholesterol is contained in a breakfast burrito? Perhaps you should switch to a high fiber based breakfast. Oh, and who is Jeff Albertson? Pardon my ignorance.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    He’s Comic Book Man.

    Banned, all of you, banned! Could that sunset BE any more orange?

    That is all.

  • Jewels

    No wonder they call him Dick. Yep.

    Morbidly obese; come on! Anyway once ya get the pant shot who looks anyplace else! Yep.

    I knew a boy in high school (even after all these years, just can’t forget him). Immediately thought of him when I saw the pant shot. Yep.

    Is that a hairbrush in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Yep.

    A few things came to mind as I looked at this pic. The mystery of why his wife stays though, solved. Yep.

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    LOL!

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    I think we now know what scared Mary away from men, too.

  • Jewels

    Re: post 7, Rosie.
    What you see is what you get. I don’t think it Depends on interpretation. I think it can be Depend-ed on that ol’ Dick (sorry, lost my train of thought…oh there it goes…) is just sitting there hangin’ out having a nice cold glass of … milk.

  • RogerMDillion

    way to lower the bar

  • http://victorplenty.blogspot.com Victor Plenty

    Flattery, Roger? Naming it a “bar” will get you nowhere.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Please make the madness stop. Please.

  • Jewels

    Victor, you are so right, and it is hanging kinda low.

    Roger, darling, what do you expect with this subject matter.

    And to Bob A. regarding: “Whose penis is shaped like that anyway? That’s not a penis, you simps.” take another gander before you slander. He’s wearing old guy dress pants, which are loosey-goosey anyway. And he is hanging loosey…Much Love.

  • http://victorplenty.blogspot.com Victor Plenty

    Actually I agree with the bunched up diaper theory proposed by RosieL, when I’m in my lucid moments. Sorry, Jewels.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Jewels, my dear, don’t make me do this. Please.

    It’s so icky.

    It’s a massive sideways bulge (wider than it is long) with no phallic shape whatsoever and it’s the same width from his crotch covering most of his left thigh. I think Rosie’s a genius — it looks like a bunched up adult diaper more than it does a penis. Trust me, girls.

    That is all.

  • Duane

    Nigel Tufnel: We’ve got armadillos in our trousers. It’s really quite frightening.

  • Jewels

    Duane! There you are! Am I surprised you showed up in this wonderful thread?! Armadillos? That might be it. A pretty big one too.
    Haven’t had a man ask me yet if I want to pet his armadillo, although you guys can be pretty inventive. :)

  • Duane

    Just a quick dip in the pole … er … pool. I’m with Bobabooey on this one, and outta here

  • http://victorplenty.blogspot.com Victor Plenty

    Nice single entendre there, Duane. Smooth.

  • Jewels

    Bobba,
    Well I had to go and get scientific, never leave any ‘stone’ unturned. (So to speak) I took the photo, set it up in my computer, did an enlargement; I differ with you sir, there is indeed an indentation between the ‘armadillo’ in the old guy trousers and his thigh. Hate to break it to you, there is armadillo outline. EW.
    Curiousity can kill a cat. Meow.

  • RogerMDillion

    “Roger, darling, what do you expect with this subject matter.”

    I don’t expect anything anymore around here, just disappointed that this counts as a BC post.

    It’s something I’d expect in a forwarded email from someone new to the Internet. Maybe next we can see a letter from someone in Liberia looking for money or a chain leter to help a sick kid.

  • http://copygodd.blogspot.com copygodd

    catheter?
    colostomy bag?
    tucked prehensile tail?

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    and why hasn’t this traumatized Dobson?

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    This whole topic is traumatizing and icky, but I’ll go to a man who is an ultimate expert in penis.

    Steve, what say you? Depends diapers, bulge of thigh fat or penis?

    That is all.

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    If it’s a penis, someone’s taken a mallet to it recently.

  • http://www.bobice-bolieve.blogspot.com Jewels

    Roger, if this post is so reprehensible why can’t you stay away? Granted it is not on par with some of the other articles we have on BC but sometimes you just should cut loose. Look at Dick.

  • http://alienboysworld.blogspot.com alienboy

    That may be Cheney but it sure ain’t no dick

    ;-)

  • with karate ill kik ur ass

    y is it that most of the ppl commenting on this thread r male?

    question to males here: do u keep ur thingy to 1 side and/or down ur trouser leg?

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    I believe most men prefer to keep theirs in a box if possible.

    I just sling mine over my shoulder to avoid any back pain.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    When did Steve become a Borscht Belt comedian?

    He’s funny today. I like the new vaudeville Steve with the one-liners.

    That is all.

  • http://www.bobice-bolieve.blogspot.com Jewels

    Steve S., I think Bobba really has a thang for you… Every reference to Dick (Chaney) he calls on you. Interesting. I understand about avoiding backpain. Good you can sling that thang over your shoulder – my “backpain” ‘issues’ have to stay right where they are…so speaks my Jewish heritage…

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    “and why hasn’t this traumatized Dobson?”

    Certainly would explain why Dobson treats the Veep with such respect and decorum. Deep down, Dobson has penis envy.

    “y is it that most of the ppl commenting on this thread r male?”

    Because males are completely obsessed by two things: emptying their bowels and the size of their schlongs.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Jewels: Oy vey, honey.

    I’ll let Steve explain why he’s an expert on penis.

    I do love him, but not in that way.

    That is all.

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    I have no idea how I got the label, but since I never win anything I’d like to walk down the runway at least once before I have to hand the crown back.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Now do you understand, Jewels? Picture the sash and tiara and the hip turn and the wave and the pouty face.

    That is all.

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    gosh Bob, when you picture me in a pageant, you really go all out. I’m flattered.

  • http://www.bobice-bolieve.blogspot.com Jewels

    I adore men in tiaras and eyeshadow. You sashay down that runway and hold that crown high Steve S.!

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    Enough about Cheney’s dick. Please stop the madness.

    Will some celebrity PLEASE threaten to sue so we can close this topic down for good? Mr. Vice President, I’m begging you to threaten legal action.

    That is all.

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    No wonder his wife is such a big cunt.

    (rim-shot) ;-P

    Please don’t ban me! “Cunt” is an awful word that only horrible sub-humans use. I’m sorry!

  • /mt/none.com Dick Cheney

    So what if I have a big cock!

    I am Dick!

    I live to screw the world!

  • http://ww.bobice-bolieve.blogspot.com Jewels

    Nice try, but no Dick.

  • http://www.magicjunk.com/blog/ Mark Sahm

    Booey: You should find a celebrity cameltoe to balance out this madness.

  • /mt/none.com Dick Cheney

    Well at least I have a go at W once in a while…

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    Mark, say hello to Paris.

  • /mt/none.com Dick Cheney

    Lynn has a nice beaver

  • /mt/none.com Dick Cheney

    seems like a good fit to me…

  • http://www.magicjunk.com/blog/ Mark Sahm

    Hello Paris! Ah, the cosmic balance has been restored to its normal insane functionality.

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    Oh my God… I am going to be very very ill.

  • http://www.magicjunk.com/blog/ Mark Sahm

    The question is: which ill is worse? Paris or Cheney? If you’re straight, it should be Cheney… even if it’s obviously a wave of Photoshop magic.

  • Jewels

    OK with Cheney it’s a mystery, Paris it’s a “tu-tu”. There is NO doubt about what we are seeing in that sweet little photo. She shaves. Angelina, you might have to step aside.

  • with karate ill kik ur ass

    well she will hold her skirt up wont she.

  • http://none.com Bob A. Booey

    What a hosebag. That camel toe wasn’t hot at all.

    That is all.

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    Paris Hilton’s torn-up cooze is hardly attractive.

    I’d rather gaze longingly at the Yosemite Sam mid-flaps on an 18-wheeler while driving on I-95…

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    mud-flaps*

    (Darn! I ruined a good joke with a farking typo! Grrr…) ;-P

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    he asked for cameltoe and I was the one who delivered. So shuddup or I’ll flash an Olsen twin nightmare your way.

  • http://adamantsun.blogspot.com Steve S

    oh. clearing the leaderboard.

  • http://Guys Marcini

    There is nothing wrong with being hung, it is obvious that he has a big one. I got a big one. 12inch and I sure believe that is a real picture. Well, by the way, I heard he is into pedophilia. Can you guys see a little girl around, perhaps he just got excited and the projection under the pants is what we are looking at. Anyway, he may be fucking Bush, that’s why they both hate gays so much. People who are something may hate that something…..

  • Retard

    Wow you’re retarded. You’re defending him by saying he has a small penis and he shits himself. Way to go.

  • Got somethin to say?!?!

    I dunno guys, I’ve seen this picture on a million other sites and it is identical. They all say the same thing to. I believe it might be elephantitus of the penis (Filiarsis) It is possible, not that I would know because I have never even seen anything close to that! ;)

  • http://victorplenty.blogspot.com Victor Plenty

    So this topic rises from the grave again. Great.

    That photo of Paris is one of the most disturbing things I have ever seen, and that was even before scrolling down to see what everyone else was talking about. Too much has already been said about that. It’s not the scariest thing in the photo. No, you have to scroll back up to see the scariest part of the picture: the dull, flat, lifeless right eye, staring blankly at the camera.

    Sometimes that shark looks right at ya. Right into your eyes. And the thing about a shark is he’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. When he comes at ya, he doesn’t even seem to be livin’… ’til he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then… ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin’…

  • Back On Welfare

    No wonder Jeff Gannon spent so much time in the white house.

  • http://www.planetadnd.com/games/pb/loging.php chicken

    I think the photo is legit. However it only makes sense. To have the balls it took to pull the shit the Neocon swine have pulled it stands to reason ther ewoudl be a matching Phalis.

    So it is confirmed Cheney really is running the show. With Bush sitting on his lap come camera time. That is why Bush messes up his speeches so much.

  • http://www.planetadnd.com/games/pb/loging.php chicken

    oh and check out my URL :P almsot forgot to add that :) its something me and my bro made.

    so far as depends go… well that depends.

  • Jet in Columbus

    Nancy, since no one else saw fit to answer your question, Sticky Fingers is an old Rolling Stone’s album that had an actual zipper in the front cover that could be zipped and unzipped superimposed over a rather prominent crotch.

    As for the photo, Cheney probably had it PhotoShopped himself, then had it released and made a big deal to be sure it was noticed.

    I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Rush Limbaugh didn’t have it blown up to poster size and it’s tacked up to the ceiling over his bed.

    But of course that’s only my opinion

  • http://www.shortarmguy.com/cheneybulge.jpg Ryan

    Check out the bulge in the Vice President’s Pants! Guess that’s why he’s called Dick Cheney!

    Here is another link for a different pic of his bulge…check it out because I do not know how to post the pic…

    Can’t say for sure, but I’ve been pounded by guys that look like him…I think it’s a good old fashioned “hide the salami” bulge!

    Hate him, but would seriously take it any day of the week it was offered!

  • Devil

    a big, fat, cliché LOL @ all of you who think that bulge is genitalia. any parent (or anyone who’s been around toddlers) knows exactly what that pic reveals. why else would he ask reporters not to use it? the creep’s health is famously horrible– why is it so hard for people to accept that he’s incontinent and wears a diaper? it’s not like there’s ANYTHING about him that makes it implausible. the guy doesn’t wear his pants three sizes too big just to make a fashion statement, you know.

    here’s another pic that shows it better– notice the lack of “hang” and the obvious bunching up high, above his right leg. i’ve got a 3-yr-old, and i’m here to tell ya, that is 100% diaper, folks. the guy shits himself.

    and really, isn’t that exactly what one should expect from the world’s biggest asshole..?

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