There are strange and mysterious tales about Peeps, those once innocent marshmallow confections being involved in all manner of unseemly situations including the persistent rumors of Peep show pornography. As this writer has a reputation for maintaining a family friendly reputation, we will delve no farther into this obscene and undoubtedly ill-advised situation.
Internet rumors persist that even those august professorial types at Emory University have studied the nature of the beast, but such urban legends are hard to trace if they are indeed true. The Peep home office does claim over 200 web sites dedicated to Peeps. Unfortunately a sampling of these web sites proves that many have broken links, making one wonder if some sort of a Peep cover-up exists. If so, what are the delicious confections hiding?
What kind of hideous experimentation has been conducted on these innocent creatures, all in the name of science? Perhaps the Peeps Research site can help explain some of the horrendous indignities perpetrated on the innocent bunnies and chickies.
CAUTION: This site shows vulnerable Peeps answering nature’s perpetual call. This voyeuristic adventure into a handful of innocent Peeps attempting to better themselves is part of ongoing experimentation, done in the name of science, from Peep Research. Their site is not for the faint of heart as it shows perfectly innocent peeps being forced to endure such traumatic experimentation as smoking, consuming alcohol, and being placed into a vacuum.
Such disgusting activities do make one question whether this experimentation was done in the name of science or simply yet another way to degrade the Peeps in question. Further investigation reveals the objectionable site in question does indeed belong to actual scientists from Emory University - Gary Falcon and James Zimring.
How such degrading things can be done to such innocent beings all in the name of science is sickening. Fortunately, more Peeps are joining the artistic community, where they are featured in award-winning films such as Lord of the Peeps. Lord of the Peeps features an unheralded, but well-grounded actor by the name of Figpeep. For more information about him, please visit FigPeep Lives. Peeps are also musically inclined and have been known to parody the Monkees.
Fortunately, impresarios are now endeavoring to lift Peeps from their artistic gutter and bring them into the mainstream of artistic life. Shaun Vecera in "The Peep Manifesto,” once wrote, “Anyone can put a Peep into a microwave and fry its butt, but it takes a true genius and inspiration to turn that yellow pile of stuff into something worth hanging on.” While the tone is rather patronizing and brings to mind the recent series of commercials manipulating cavemen, at least Vecera is attempting to shine the light of hope on an oppressed species.
Article comments
1 - Kaonashi
Thank you for your thoughtful and amusing insight into those wonderful Peeps! And I loved your links!