The Next Food Network Craze - Page 2

Author: ElissonPublished: Apr 07, 2011 at 2:29 pm 1 comment

Cupcakes are lovable enough. They’re tasty, they’re cute, and they appeal to the little kid that lives in the back of your brainstem. But it’s only a matter of time before some other appealing nostalgia-laden food comes along and throws those dopey little cakes under the bus. Chef Michael Symon seems to think it’s the doughnut that will next take its place in the sun. I have an even better idea.

Funnel cakes.

Yes, funnel cakes. What is a funnel cake, after all, but a free-form Jackson Pollockoid doughnut? Like any kind of sweet fried dough, funnel cakes start right off tasting great, and they can only get better with a little Cheffy Pizzazz. (Never mind the calories. With their high surface area-to-volume ratio, funnel cakes are grease-bombs of nuclear proportions.)

I can imagine Michael Symon’s funnel cake: made from batter impregnated with exotic spices, dusted with cinnamon, confectioner’s sugar, and ancho chile powder. Hell, I’d eat one in a heartbeat.

And it’s only a matter of time before the stores start popping up. Gigi’s Cupcakes? That was last week. Now, everyone’s flocking to Elisson’s Funky FunCakes™. (Even the name says “fun”!)

Just wait a few months and tell me I’m wrong.

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Article Author: Elisson

Elisson is the nom de blog of Steve Krodman, author of Shorts in a Wad: One Hundred 100-Word Stories. Steve lives in the steaming suburbs of Atlanta, Georgia with his wife and cat. He is partial to good food, fine wine, tasteful literature, and Ridiculous Poetry. …

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  • 1 - Ian

    Apr 08, 2011 at 9:46 am

    I also confess to being a Food Network junky, but the food seems to be vanishing from the network.

    The trend is increasingly towards renovation projects, food cart races, and attempts to beat records.

    I think the current direction is mainly fruit-cake.

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