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Sundance Film Festival 2010: Opening Weekend’s “Bottom Five”

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I’ve never sat down to come up with a top ten list before in my life. Thankfully, when the list you’re compiling consists only of 10 films seen for a column such as this, it makes things far easier. While choosing which films to see while braving the weather in Park City, Utah over opening weekend of the 2010 Sundance Film Festival (coincidentally celebrating its 25th anniversary this year) one can read all they want into synopses but it may never fully prepare you for what you’re in for.

While some of these have already been picked up for distribution, there are many that may never see a national release and could head straight for a deserved direct-to-video death (at least in one case). A few will undoubtedly be picked up in the long run and rightly deserve so while others probably won’t but more than deserve to. I have tried to come up with the best way to lay out the list and think the best way to go about things is to split it in half and start with the bottom of the heap…

10. Southern District (Zona sur)

The less said about this, the better. Here is a film so rancid, contrived, and flat-out boring that even if writer/director Juan Carlos Valdivia had centered his entire movie around the voyeuristic sex scenes it would rightly earn itself the ultimate death of the MPAA’s much dreaded NC-17 rating. If you think sitting around listening to the rich whine and moan about how hard life is or how much it sucks that your mom would never understand why you would rather live life as a poor outcast lesbian in Bolivia is enjoyable, then you desperately need to have your head examined. This is such a disgusting display of humanity that even a somewhat interesting cinematic technique can't save it. (The camera literally seems to be positioned on a lazy Susan and just slowly spins around the room while characters do whatever they think is necessary to carry the scene to another dull fadeout where you wish it was you fading out instead.)

9. Daddy Longlegs

Thankfully, nothing else seen was nearly as bad as Southern District. While co-writers/directors Ben and Joshua Safdie have not quite created the tell-all about growing up with a crazy father (the Coen Brothers’ A Serious Man was far better) it at least isn’t a complete disaster. Ronald Bronstein plays far-from-father-of-the-year Lenny who only gets to see his two boys Sage and Frey (played by real-life brothers Sage and Frey Ranaldo) two weeks a year. They all get in trouble together and ramble through life learning nothing from their experiences and try to keep it together long enough that the boys’ mother doesn’t snatch them away early and stop Lenny from having any visitation rights at all. The ending is far too ambiguous and there’s an excruciatingly out of place dream sequence that is even more so due to the hand-held camera style at work for the last 80 minutes. Ronald Bronstein comes off as the second coming of Denis Leary but it is only in voice.

8. 7 Days (Les 7 jours du talion)

The French have definitely been giving America a run for its money when it comes to the horror genre. While some are far better than others, at least they have moments of unexpected poignancy and even better, true instances of reflection on human nature. This is, as expected, the case in director Daniel Grou’s 7 Days. Working from a script by Patrick Senécal  adapting his own novel, it makes you wonder if the fact that the original source happens to be a novel is why the film is so contemplative and realistic in the way it deals with doctor Bruno Hamel (Claude Legault) exacting revenge upon Anthony Lemaire (Martin Dubreuil) after Lemaire has raped and murdered Hamel's daughter. While some have culled this into the genre of “torture porn,” it never gets anywhere near as brutal or disgusting as those true torture porn films. Lots of the violence even happens off-screen so you never see it, or even hear much of it either. Legault as Doctor Hamel gives a riveting performance even if the script starts to flounder around by around the fourth day.

About Cinenerd

A Utah based writer, born and raised in Salt Lake City, UT for better and worse. Cinenerd has had an obsession with film his entire life, finally able to write about them since 2009, and the only thing he loves more are his wife and their two wiener dogs (Beatrix Kiddo and Pixar Animation). He is accredited with the Sundance Film Festival.
  • J.Sal

    What the hell are you doing in Sundance, to be there and to write about it you have to know something about cinema, and clearly you are as ignorant as Jason Friedberg

  • http://www.johnrobertholbrook.com Sundance 2010

    Fashion Designer John Robert Holbrook ( J.R. Holbrook ) selects the 5 best and worst dressed celebrities that attended the 26th annual Sundance Film Festival January 21-31, 2010.

    5 BEST

    1 RYAN REYNOLDS – This man has golden era movie star style and looks! Why is he married again? He could be the new Warren Beatty!

    2 KATIE HOLMES – Elegant, slender, talented and TALL! I wondered if she smacks Tom around? Her film “The Romantics” was a lot of fun! Katie’s game is ON!

    3 JOAN RIVERS – She is the original funny girl and style guru! She is a hard act to follow. She is the reason I started The Sundance Fashion Review in 2002!

    4 MARISA TOMEI – A graceful, ageless beauty that has great taste. Her clothing brought out her beautiful skin, hair and smile!

    5 JESSICA ALBA – The Sundance home run hottie! Amazing coat over a warm, elegant casual outfit! Loved it! Her film, “The Killer Inside Me”, traumatized me for days!

    5 WORST

    1 ADRIAN GRENIER – The line from “Devil Wears Prada” came to mind when I saw him, “I asked for clean, athletic and smiley and they sent me DIRTY, TIRED and PAUNCHY! He acts to big for his britches and there are many examples of his bad manners throughout the festival!

    2 BILL GATES – He is the worst dressed billionaire! He was dancing at a house party trying to be hip and cool and it was totally not natural for him. The girls at the party were laughing at him and it took him right back to high school! Sorry Billy.
    ** On an amazing note, Bill Gates donated 10 billion dollars today to immunize the world children! Awesome!

    3 KRISTEN STEWART – She looked great in the movie “The Runaways” but her personal clothing choices were off. She was always hiding her face from the crowd like a vampire. I guess that is what happens when you have a shy actress portray a fearless musician!

    4 TILDA SWINTON – I would have liked to have seen her in more feminine clothing to offset her extremely masculine features.

    5 MARK RUFFALO – Guy-rilla! Did you make your own clothes on your family compound!? He looks like one of the cast members of “BIG LOVE”! Pull it together!!!

    BEST COUPLE
    Fergie & Josh Duhamel – All I can say is GLAMOROUS! They are the new Brangelina!

    WORST COUPLE
    Tommy Lee Jones & Chris Cooper – A lot of talent that looks TIRED! I did love their film “The Company Men”!