Without going into all the details (which I already provided to the Polizei so leave me be!), there was an unfortunate incident at a sandwich shop near my village this evening. Suffice it to say, I take great issue with suicide-stupidity.
By the time a person is twenty-one years old that person should know better than to say something stupid like “People who commit suicide are selfish/lazy.” Even if people who committed suicide were selfish/lazy, uttering this statement when one doesn’t know for absolute sure that no one within earshot has lost a loved one to suicide is some hell-bound bad manners.
It’s illogical to conclude that someone who has committed suicide was selfish/lazy to do so. The people who think this way have never known the peril of intense self-loathing on that level. Having led a relatively decent life has somehow skewed their perspective. They’ve never looked in the mirror and been so revolted that they would desire to kill much less successfully kill the source of that reflection. Relatively speaking, they’ve known nothing but good times. If one was able to recover from a traumatic event(s) in one’s life, one’s life has been good. Maybe one’s life hasn’t been great, but obviously not as bad as others. People who committed suicide knew no such good time when it counted most. They did not recover. To add insult to injury, some living jackass comes along and berates what was already thought by the suicidal person to be a big fat nothing. Good going. Kick ‘em when they’re dead.
Let’s take a look at what is heard by the loved one left behind. But before we do, let’s put aside the idea of letting jackass off the hook just because he/she didn’t know there was someone around whose loved one committed suicide — they should’ve at least asked first. Of course this begs the question “Who the hell would ask such a thing?” Who the hell indeed! If one isn’t willing to ask, then where does one get the will to voice an opinion? Or is it that one has absolutely no consideration for other people’s feelings? Let’s look at that. The unspoken sentiment behind the already inhuman statement “People who commit suicide are selfish/lazy” is “So what that his/her suicide caused you tremendous grief and that it may take you years to recover from your loss — take heart in knowing what a selfish, lazy, inconsiderate person they were. How could you have loved such a person in the first place?”
One doesn’t have to have a degree in psychology to rightly conclude these people have no boundaries. As willing as they are to invade your boundaries, they’ll likely (subconsciously) allow you to invade theirs for lack of any communication skills or empathy from which to rebound back. So I say have at it. Exploit at will. They say your loved one’s suicide was selfish/lazy, tell them they’re way too short/fat/tall/thin/dark/light to ever be loved by a decent human being. When someone violates the decency code by making fun of or commenting negatively about something you can’t help, give it right back. Or, if you’re standing in line at a sandwich shop, start sobbing uncontrollably in which case the focus will turn to them because they are in a better position to answer others when they ask, “What’s wrong?” If the jackass lies, eke out what they said as best you can and watch the fireworks begin.
The important thing for everyone else to remember is that you don’t have to have lost a loved one to suicide to put jackass in his/her place. If you’re feeling froggy, do it on behalf of all those who did suffer that loss but aren’t emotionally stable enough to do it themselves.
Nobody likes anybody that makes somebody cry. But I sure did, er, do love to see a jackass squirm.