Home / Stop the Presses: Celebrities We Are Completely Sick of Hearing About

Stop the Presses: Celebrities We Are Completely Sick of Hearing About

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From CNN to the Enquirer, from Larry King to Barbara Walters, celebrities are in the news constantly. This is intriguing, to a point, but it often changes from intriguing to just annoying. This is particularly true when it comes to certain celebrities, celebrities that are shoved down our throats whenever our mouths are even slightly open. The following is a list of some of the celebrities who are always in the news, even when they shouldn't be.

Lindsay Lohan: Is it just me, or is Lindsay Lohan's recent arrest an attempt on her part to make sure other scandalous stars don't get anything she doesn't? I can just picture her, over a hushed conversation with her manager, saying, "Paris got to go to jail; now I want to!" But, of course, she is innocent of any wrongdoing — those drugs in her pocket weren't hers. I'm sure it's true, I know I often have cocaine in my pocket, only it's not so much cocaine as it is pocket lint.

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen: As a twin myself, it's possible that the Olsen twins make my list because I'm jealous: hell, my twin sister and I couldn't even score a Doublemint commercial, much less a billion dollar empire. Sure, they were cute when they were young and they obviously have made the right business connections, but do we really need to hear about everything they're doing? Now, do yourself a favor, and talk about my sister and me instead.

Britney Spears: I have to admit, the press coverage of her recent OK magazine interview was pretty entertaining. I particularly enjoyed the image of Britney wiping grease from fried chicken on her several thousand dollar rented dress. But, why is everything Britney does reported?  At first it was mildly interesting, now it's just kind of sad.

Brangelina: Yes, he's gorgeous. Yes, she's beautiful. But still, I'm a little Brangelina'd out. Now, I will admit, it's nice to see positive press about celebrities: their humanitarian efforts are wonderful and we can only hope that the publicity of their actions will help others follow suit. Yet, do we need to hear about their vacations or turn the pages of every newspaper hoping for a daily update on a possible wedding?  No, I'd rather just turn to the funnies.

TomKat: Ah, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, wherever there's a magazine, there will be the face of these two. I half expect to someday see the front page of the New York Times and read, "Daughter Suri has Bowel Movement: TomKat Very Pleased." Making fun of Tom doing his Oprah couch dance was entertaining and his "Placenta: it's what's for dinner" campaign was crazy enough to be intriguing, but now TomKat is getting sort of boring. I long for the days when Tom was more public with his insanity.

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About JM Jordan

  • tds

    You forgot Paris Hilton – if she fell off the radar, it would be okay with me

  • Agreed. You forgot about Katie and Peter, but then, most people do.

  • Oh good, no Paris Hilton on your list. Paris is alright by me. Conrad Hilton is thinking of cutting her off of a $60million inheritance? That is what I saw on the tube.

    Oh Paris, get it together. You did go to debutante school, you know.

  • JJ

    You seriously heard that she is getting cut off of her ineritance? That’s awesome. My parents threaten me with that, but my inheritance is like five dollars so it’s no big deal.

  • JJ, serious! I just caught it somewhere on a news report of legit nature last night.

  • Nancy

    We can hope. Who knows? It may be the making of her, to her good & ours. Maybe if she has it rough for real, she’ll end up as another Mother Teresa?

  • dinigi

    M A D O N N A. I would die happy if I NEVER heard her name again. FOUL SKANK