Julio Lugo - God has no comment.
Dustin Pedroia - Little-known fact: Every World Series champion has had a pocket-sized middle infielder with a heart of gold. This is a similar rule to the one that requires Julia Roberts' best roles to involve her playing a hooker with a heart of gold. God's just playing all the angles.
Kevin Youkilis - God's actually not too thrilled that Youkilis, the Greek God of Walks, wormed his way on the roster for the World Series. He doesn't need anyone reminding the world that polytheism used to be hip. Still, God's not gonna get uptight about it; God's an easy-going customer. We cool. We cool.
Outfielders
Coco Crisp - The Moose is a hitman for Satan. 'Nuff said.
J.D. Drew - World Series rings delivered by the Lord have the power to heal invalids. This will undoubtedly help Drew next season.
Jacoby Ellsbury - As the first Navajo major leaguer, a chance to hoist the trophy would be a nice make-good for being forced to endure being surrounded by 40,000 Cleveland fans completely devoid of irony.
Bobby Kielty - Sometimes it's important just to recognize the miracle of life itself and how much God loves all His children.
Manny Ramirez - Manny is God's reminder that there's more to His creation than the World Series. Still, God wants Manny to have another ring to put on his big toe.
Designated Hitters
David Ortiz - God likes messing with the sabermetric types occasionally, just to keep the mystery in life; Mr. Clutch is Exhibit A.
There you go, Red Sox Nation: 25(ish) reasons that God's rooting for you in October. As if the Yankees' offseason so far wasn't enough proof...
Article comments
1 - Benjamin Pray
Very funny stuff...the Shilling line kills me and Stuart...
2 - Michael J. West
Between the BoSox pennant and the Yankees' offseason, winning the World Series would merely be the icing on the cake at this point. :-)
3 - Bill from LA
God has nothing to do with who wins the game. I do know from what I have read acroos the country that the Red Sox fans are more childish than the Yankee fans. Maybe thats just an East Coast thing. Bad Sports Fans. Its only a game. I believe it only took Boston 92 years to win a World Series compared to their big brother, the Yankees who have won 26 World Series to date.
4 - C
God has nothing to do with who wins the world series, pro cancer? are you serious? You are the reason I hate the redsox.
5 - Mary K. Williams
First of all, this was a SATIRE. Even this Christian gets it. Although the cancer comment was questionable, over all - the piece was done for fun.
It must be said though, no one here in Boston says 'BoSox'.
6 - Mark Saleski
no one here in Boston says 'BoSox
...or "beantown" either.
just sayin'