Well, my 42-0 drubbing prediction in Week One didn’t necessarily pan out. I’m going to tell you, fair reader, something I never told my ex-wife: I was wrong. I’m sorry. Your butt doesn’t look fat in those jorts.
It looks like Week Two is gonna be just as tough as Week One for the Pats, if not more so. Mostly for me, since I’m gonna have to wake up at ten in the morning like a freakin’ cow-farmer. One of the disadvantages of living on West Coast time.
On Sunday morning, the Pats travel to the breathtaking Meadowlands to take on the New Jersey Jets. The battle for first place in the AFC East. It’s on..
Who’s got the edge in Week Two? Let’s go gandering:
Quarterback – This matchup is a teenage girl’s cream dream. The dreamy Tom Brady against the foxy Mark Sanchez. Hold on, lemme get my manhood back. As amazing as Sanchez was against the Texans, you just don’t bet on rookie QBs. Although technically, playing at USC, he’s been a professional football player for some time now. Edge? Pats.
Backfield – Thomas Jones is the best back on either side on Sunday. But the Pats platoon looked great at times on Monday. Fred Taylor came back from the dead, Larry Maroney came back from the deader and Kevin Faulk didn’t Faulk up. Thomas Jones and Leon Washington, though, will be a significant upgrade over Fred Jackson’s performance in Week One. Edge? Jets.
Receivers – Dustin Keller and Jerricho Cotchery aren’t bad; but the Pats receivers blow them out of the water. Randy Moss is already off to a rousing start and Ben Watson had two clutch touchdowns in the final two minutes. Wes Welker and Joey Galloway are the question marks. Welker just seemed to be off for the entire game on Monday; and I’m not quite sure Joey Galloway showed up. Still, Randy alone will out-catch the Jersey Jets. Edge? Pats.
Offensive Line – I can’t express enough how old and past-their-prime our O-Line is. It’s Sebastian Vollmer Time. Please install The Berlin Wall, we need him desperately. The Jets, on the other hand, have a man named D’Brickashaw, which scares the hell out of me. Alan Faneca, Nick Mangold, Brandon Moore, Damien Woody; the Jets line is one of the finest in the league. A rookie quarterback couldn’t be luckier. Unless he was dating Hilary Rhoda. (To the Google Image Search engine!) Edge? Jets.
Article comments
1 - Grampie Bob
You were right about Hilary Rhoda but wrong about the Pats. Brady is going to be wicked-pissa-awesome this week; Welker will be Welker and Moss will be "Rician".
2 - GA
Soooo into the Pat's
Get a grip....