"See Ya" At U. of Michigan Hockey This Year - Page 2

But wait a second. I can certainly see why Michigan athletic director Bill Martin wants the chant to go. He's got parents complaining to him that they can't take their kids to attend a violent, physical game where in certain instances it's perfectly okay for one player to slam another player into the boards and pin him there (and if it's an illegal check, the penalty is a harsh two-minute ban from the game — five if it's really bad). And Martin has to either do something about it or defend the gosh darn rootin'-tootin' motherlovin' fingerlickin' student tradition.

It's this kind of behavior that makes hockey great. I mean, none of us would yell a 15-second obscenity at passersby who trips on the sidewalk? (Well, I can't speak for everyone.) Going to a hockey game allows us to release all that anger toward an insignificant, harmless goal — hoping the other team loses by creating a backstory of their goalie sucking cock. Michigan fans simply channeled this frustration into an amazingly obscene chant. No hard feelings, opposing team.

Hockey brings out the carnal spiteful prick and bitch in all of us. And since Tie Domi just retired — effectively increasing tooth retention in organized sports by 6000 percent — we need something to fill that void.

The Michigan Wolverine hockey team opens its nonconference schedule with visiting Alabama-Huntsville on October 13. Knowing certain denizens of Huntsville, we may have ourselves the most F-bomb-laden game in history. If you go, it's probably a good idea to start humming "Ahhhhhhh" right before the first face-off.

Article Author: Matthew T. Sussman

Sussman is the sports editor of BC Magazine and the executive editor of Technorati. He also writes for Deadspin and Toledo Free Press. He and Tuffy can be heard hosting the Treehouse Fort, Sundays at 12 noon ET. Plus, he Twitters. …

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