A burble in the space-time continuum results in a script from the future sent back to today. The script is for Rocky XX. As the film begins...
Rocky Balboa finds himself in a retirement home. It turns out to be a meeting place of former opponents who are roughly the same age, though Rocky, brain-damaged from his previous bouts, is the one in need of the most urgent care.
Remarkably, Apollo Creed, Mr. T, Drago, and Tommy Gunn all maintain housing at the same place. No that it matters. Theyâ€™re just â€śchillin'.â€ť They know better.
Enter the only real boxer in the group. At first he isnâ€™t recognized. But the secret canâ€™t be kept forever. While one of the nurses removes a bandage over a portion of the manâ€™s head, the unmistakable sign of a partially torn ear emerges. Of course, itâ€™s Evander Holyfield.
One day, Rocky bumps his wheelchair into Holyfieldâ€™s. Rocky mumbles an apology but Holyfield, whose hearing, like his career, is not what it once was, interprets it as a challenge.
The match is brutal. Dentures careen from walls, injuring a staff member from the center. Rocky, borrowing a tactic from Tyson, attempts to gum Holyfieldâ€™s ear until it drops off. Like Rocky V, it doesnâ€™t work.
The match ends with the Centerâ€™s doctor administering a heavy dose of thorazine to the â€śfightersâ€ť and the two fall asleep in much the same way the audience did in the last Rocky motion picture.
Sure, the plot is lame. But so is Holyfieldâ€™s apparent decision to step into the ring again.
As if James Toney and journeyman Larry Donald had not been convincing enough in reminding Holyfield that his career was deep-sixed long ago, we hear that Evander will be in a match with another punching bag; Jeremy Bates. Shame on the Texas Department of Licensing.
Like Stallone, who canâ€™t stop making the Rocky movies (yet another movie deal pending), Holyfield canâ€™t hang up his gloves. The retirement home movie could be fun, but none of the alternatives will be.