Ohio University Is Proof You Are Stupid

Part of: MACrimony

Ohio and Georgetown / Getty ImagesI can't explain why Ohio University beat Georgetown by 14 and you can't either. Hell, I'm still trying to figure out how they even won the MAC tournament. But now they're one of 48 teams left in the country still playing for a championship.

You're going to hear all these astounding facts about Ohio U.'s team, and if you veg out to SportsCenter on a nightly basis you may know many of them by now: they were predicted to finish last in the MAC East. They finished 7-9 in the conference and seeded ninth out of 12 teams in the MAC tourney. They needed overtime to win their first round game at Ball State. Armon Bassett, their leading scorer, transferred from Indiana after being kicked off the team.

Now for some more arcane trivia. Bassett and starting forward DeVaughn Washington began the season suspended, while two other players were also disciplined after being caught with marijuana during a traffic stop, and one of those guys was eventually dismissed from the program.

And that's all you really know. Because none of this equates to a team that even has their shit together, let alone to a team that could hang 98 on the Big East Tournament runners up and then — on a day of myriad buzzer-beaters and center-court dog piles — calmly shake hands with their opponents as if they were supposed to win like this.

This is not the team I saw in person last month. On February 4 the Bobcats beat Toledo 65-58 in overtime. Toledo was a bad, bad team. (I could write 2,000 words on Toledo's season, but I'll relegate it to two numbers: 4 and 28.) For this game Ohio dressed just nine players since Washington was — surprise! — suspended yet again.

But coach John Groce wasn't done dishing out punishments. Ohio's message board says that Bassett was sent to the locker room in the second half for a lack of hustle. I don't recall this, but he was subbed out with plenty of time left and never played again, finishing with five points. As the game progressed, UT's big men kept fouling out (they were literally down to one guy taller than 6'6", and he was a pipecleaner) so by default, Ohio won the game. That near-loss to the awful Rockets was hardly a wake-up call, since their next game was a nine-point loss to Eastern Michigan. There were absolutely no warning signs of Ohio beating Georgetown. So don't feel bad, and simply know that they will play Tennessee in the second round on Saturday.

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Article Author: Matthew T. Sussman

Sussman is the founder and former editor of Blogcritics Sports. Twitter: @suss2hyphens

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Article comments

  • 1 - Chris

    Mar 19, 2010 at 9:20 am

    Wow, is this what journalism has become in the US? A few one liners and a premise/conclusion that makes Fox News look unbiased. If anyone actually wants some real news coverage, I would check BBC or NPR. They even have better sports coverage than this site.

    Best regards,
    counting down until they delete this message.

  • 2 - Mike

    Mar 19, 2010 at 12:43 pm

    I agree with the above statement

  • 3 - Mike

    Mar 19, 2010 at 12:45 pm

    This guy tries to make 90% of his articles witty and "humorous" instead of actually writing about the topic

  • 4 - Lude

    Mar 19, 2010 at 1:36 pm

    you might be right i do now feel dumber after reading this terrible article.

    you are plain and simple a hater. you are simply jealous that your chocolate rockets only won four games the entire year! look at the bright side there is always next year LOL!

  • 5 - Matthew T. Sussman

    Mar 19, 2010 at 3:28 pm

    I'm incredibly happy that Ohio has represented the MAC by finally winning for the conference and turning it around after being in shambles to start the season.

    And I've read comments from fans in February who said they were never more ashamed to be a Bobcats fan until this season. Then they go and beat Georgetown. It's boggling. It's insane. It's remarkable.

  • 6 - Geosota

    Mar 19, 2010 at 5:21 pm

    Chris/Bob - May I provide some friendly advice? If you are going to comment under two names, a) make them a bit more creative, b) don't make the same level typos in each, and c) introduce a little dissonance between your two voices.

    Personally, I felt this piece perfectly captured the zeitgeist pervading Ohio and her diaspora. Unemployment is up again, but we just had a congressman sell his vote on healthcare for ride on Air Force One. The bit about the Ohio/Toledo game was hysterical.

  • 7 - Hirosota

    Mar 19, 2010 at 5:36 pm

    Geosota-san - Everything you say is almost true. Toledo game classic tragedy, not funny.

    In Japan we love Ohio sport and contrasulate Ohio University. We have drinking game. Ohio means "good morning" in Japanese. Every time sport presenter say "Ohio" we say "Ohio" and drink sake! Funny part is it makes "bad morning" like Washington DC after Georgetown loss.

  • 8 - barga

    Mar 19, 2010 at 8:19 pm

    All I know is that I am getting psyched up for the Ohio OSU game

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