NFL Week 17 - Shame On You - Page 4

Part of: NFL Picks of a Thoughtful Fool

You know, the Bills really seem to have trouble playing in bad weather. Hello, you're in Buffalo. Did you design your team with global warming in mind? The Bills pooch-screwing cost me on both the money line and point spread. On the spread I still came out okay.

4-2 versus the spread making the season record 33-20-2, or $7130 returned from a $6050 layout for a profit of $1080, assuring us of an up year in the point spread. Yea for me!

The money line, however, fell to pieces, as expected. For a layout of $500 we got back $230 for $270 loss bringing our annual profit to $761.99. With the Week of Shame upon us and the havoc it reeks on the formula...Ward, I'm worried about the money line.

Fins lose! Fins lose! Fins lose! And secure first pick in the draft. But that's not necessarily a good thing. It means you are either going to drop 30 million on some untested kid or you are going to have to convince another team to give you some combination of personnel & picks for the right to drop 30 million on some untested kid. How Parcells handles this mess will be the drama of the off-season. The Dolphins need help at just about every position, with the exception of running back which is probably the least important, so who knows? I'm just hoping we get regular post-game interviews with the Vice-president of Football Operations. I'm sick and tired of bland coaches. We didn't have one serious press conference meltdown all year. All we can do is watch those inane Coors Light commercials and reminisce.

And finally, let me say that I was glad Troy Smith got a decent game in for the Ravens — not good, but decent for a first start, by which I mean he didn't throw an interception or make a fool of himself. He performed much better than the first overall pick JaMarcus "the Giant" Russell. If Billick is smart we'll get to see Troy Smith again this week, so we probably won't get to see Troy Smith again.

Spread Picks (spreadsheet)

We now enter the Week of Shame. The week when the causal link between quality and victory is turned on its head. The week when the mighty paragons of honorable competition happily mail it in. It's even worse this year since so much is already decided. The hated Titans are favored over the Colts, the Redskins are favored over the Cowboys, Carolina is favored over Tampa Bay, Houston over Jacksonville, even Atlanta is favored over Seattle. All this on the assumption that the superior teams are just going to roll over to get their stomachs tickled instead of risk and injury. Interestingly, Green Bay is still favored over Detroit. I'm not entirely sure how to read that, but I suspect it's just another swipe at Matt Millen.

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Article Author: David Mazzotta

David Mazzotta is author of the comic novels Apple Pie and Business as Usual.

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Article comments

  • 1 - Matthew T. Sussman

    Dec 28, 2007 at 11:57 am

    Since it's Week 17, and you're ahead, shouldn't you be resting your picks and just put in the backup?

  • 2 - RJ Elliott

    Dec 30, 2007 at 10:39 pm

    Vince Young has no guts.

  • 3 - david mazzotta

    Dec 30, 2007 at 11:16 pm

    Well, it could have been worse. Looks like I break even on the point spread and drop around half my cushion on the money line.

    You're right Suss. I should have just taken the week off.

  • 4 - david mazzotta

    Dec 30, 2007 at 11:26 pm

    Yes RJ. Which QB was it that had to have his linemen carry him to the line of scrimage in a key game a few years back?(Was it McNabb?) Doubt we'll be seeing aything like that from Vince.

    On the other hand, if Young can't run, he just guy in pads who throws like a girl.

    Now I hate the Titans even more.

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