A few years ago, I "scored" tickets to one of the Zig Ziglar-style motivational seminars, crafted chiefly to motivate me to give them my money as a sure-fire investment to fame and riches. (Their fame and riches. My money.) I accepted the tickets for the opportunity to hear Rudy Giuliani speak. However, once inside the Reality Distortion Field (™ Steve Jobs), presentations that have been through numerous rock tumblers in Boise, Omaha, Atlanta, and Peoria kept my rapt attention despite being laden with absolute evil.
The cavernous United Center shrunk in each speaker's skilled hands, making it feel like only the lucky 12,000 attendees of this seminar knew the secrets of turning real estate and stock market investments into fully-realized dreams.
None were as skilled as Giuliani, though. His recitation of the events of September 11, 2001 made the professional speakers seem to be rank amateurs, lucky to get through their first speech on Abraham Lincoln before the bell rang. The skilled national politician spun a well-practiced tale with all the appearance of a casual fireside chat. It wasn't until his fifth mention of Ronald Reagan that I realized he was practicing his Presidential stump speech.
Just before Giuliani spoke, the second-most anticipated speaker of the day shuffled to center stage. This man had little speaking experience, so he had an interviewer to help guide him. He had little to offer intellectually, so his questions were light on content. His greatest skill involved inflicting bodily harm, not public speaking, making him a horrible choice to grace the stage with so many eloquent men and women.
Chicago Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher received the biggest cheers of the day.
Athletes of the last 20 years are trained from a very early age to hone their skills in a single sport, only occasionally breaking away from club teams, AAU teams, and year-round practices to join another sport for a few months. Players for well-heeled high schools, clubs, colleges, and professional teams receive iPods for their video study, interactive activities on laptops for remediation on difficult schemes, and even Madden-style video games to practice identifying opposition plays.
Of course, this makes them dreadful contributors to society outside their core interest. In nearly every other field than sport, this kind of devotion is met with reactions ranging from concern to the strong urge to cross the street to avoid the lunatic. Players that show any less interest in their given field than slavish devotion to the cult of sport are labeled as "lacking passion" in draft reports when their only sin is having more than one.
Article comments
1 - david
a lacking aptitude in public speaking is not absolutely indicative of a one-dimensional person.
2 - Tuffy
Excellent clarification. However, lacking aptitude in public speaking and being one-dimensional is indicative of an athlete.
3 - ben
Going to a stupid motivational seminar and complaining about its content is about the stupidest thing I've ever encountered. What's your next trick? Going to a NASCAR race and complaining that it's boring and repetitive? You just live to whine and fail, don't you?
4 - Matthew T. Sussman
I know, almost like complaining about an article online.
5 - Graham McKnight
A colorfully written article; your choice of words were a pleasure on the eye.
I am uncomfortable with the notion that the universal athlete is ineffective at addressing the public though. In the very least, they serve as a bridge between policy pushers and the masses.
6 - Tuffy
Graham, excellent point, but players are ill-equipped for that role. Also, I am similarly uncomfortable with the notion of the worker class acting as a buffer for the owner class. Let the well-compensated public relations firms handle this task.