There was a news report that came across the wire yesterday (4 Jun 2007) about a farmer in Germany who sued some kids who were lighting off firecrackers. The farmer claimed that it made his ostrich impotent. The judge ruled against the farmer, stating he could see no connection between the firecrackers and the impotent ostrich.
I read on and on with great amusement as the mainstream media tries to decide what to do about the Barry Bonds problem. The rumors have been swirling around Bonds since 2004, and the tide is rising these days to a crescendo.
His crime?
- He is about to break the all-time career home run mark of 755 set by Hank Aaron.
- Many people think he is a nasty guy.
Here’s my take – If Bonds did anything illegal and you can prove it, charge him. If he broke the rules of baseball and you can prove it, suspend him. For Bud Selig and Hank Aaron to act all high and mighty and saying they won’t show to watch Bonds break the record makes them both look like petulant children.
And here’s why.
Major League Baseball (MLB) has known about the rampant use of steroids by professional baseball players for over ten years. Bud Selig knew about it. Hank Aaron, a prominent baseball guy, had to know it too.
Neither are idiots, but they are playing ones for TV.
Ten years ago, though, Bud and Hank didn’t know two things:
- Steroids work.
- Steroids are bad for you.
When it became apparent that they may be working, MLB looked the other way because the increase in offense was creating a resurgence of interest in baseball, and this was much needed after they called-off the World Series in 1994.
Then, in 2005, Mark McGwire raised his right hand and told Congress he would not discuss his past. Rafael Palmeiro shook his finger at the congressional committee and declared he had never done steroids (although he did let his teammates stick a B-12 vitamin shot in his butt from time to time), and Sammy Sosa muttered unintelligibly.
The only credible witness was Palmeiro, who shortly after tested positive under the new enforcement program. He is now out of baseball.
So, who takes the fall? Well, somebody has to pay. In 2004, MLB decided it was Barry Bonds who would be their fall guy. He had the season home run record of 73, but at his age, there is no way he will get close to Aaron’s career record, right?
Wrong. Nasty, surly old Barry Bonds is going to break baseball’s greatest record, and Bud Selig stomps his foot and says he’s not going. Henry Aaron then stomps his foot and whines if Bud’s not going, I’m not going either.
Fools.
Why?
First of all, it is universally assumed that steroids make you better, and this is simply not true. If Barry Bonds did take performance enhancing drugs, is it a stretch to say that they may have hampered his production and he may have hit over 800 home runs by now?
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