Wielding the rounded, overly-inflated football, the ref began the match with the least traditional jump-ball I’d ever seen, ricocheting the pigskin off the ground and into the air for the “ruckmen” to snag.
And thus, I began watching my first game of Aussie Rules football.
Now, let’s get back to that kwerky kangaroo konnection. Unlike rugby or gridiron, throwing isn’t allowed in Aussie Rules, so the players are instead forced to emulate their favorite bounding beasts. The most common types of passing between teammates are punching or kicking — which just so happen to be two styles of martial arts that feral kangaroos are usually known for. Furthermore, if the ball-carrier is forced to take more than an allotted amount of steps, he must resort to the kangaroos’ means of transport: bouncing (the ball).
Still, just like Shawne Merriman's knee, the game has some kinks to work out. Not only could no one tell me exactly how much time was in a quarter — ranging from 28-32 minutes, it’s apparently at the timekeeper’s discretion — but throughout the match, these random, irritating little men decided to interrupt the action at the most inopportune times. It turned out these roly-polies were actually the trainers and waterboys, distributing drinks and medical tape and all looking about seven feet shorter than the athletes.
Aside from those annoying little people — somehow, only two got run over during the action — the aspects of soccer, basketball, and marsupial blended to create a free-flowing, highly-physical spectacle that, by the game’s close, brought me to my feet. From the booming, no-look kicks, to Sydney’s main enforcer throwing his weight (and elbows) around — seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if this dude was the inspiration for Ed Norton in American History X — the entire three-hour contest was remarkable.
It may sounds blasphemous, but I think it could be argued that Australia rules football.
Oh, one last kangaroo korrelation. Just because it goes well with kangaroo, barbecue sauce does not make an Aussie Rules pigskin taste any better.
Article comments
1 - Rob de Santos
Great take on your first AFL match. When you get back to the states, you can find a whole community of fans of the sport at AFANA. Americans and Canadians who are converts to the sport along some Aussie ex-pats. We're also glad to answer questions about the game.
2 - Ben Cyphery
Casey,
When you make it back to Portland, please get in touch [Personal contact info deleted]. We would love to have you cover one of our games next year; the 2008 season just finished and the 2009 season starts in March.
Cheers,
Ben