Even as very small children we are taught to treat others the way we would want to be treated. This was the golden rule in my first child’s kindergarten class and something we strive to teach our children at home. We all encourage our children to make friends and accept each persons differences. No name calling, fighting or making others feel less of a person simply because they are different. Yet, how often do we apply the rule to ourselves?
No, I am not saying we as adults go into the office and start taunting office mates or poking fun of Judy and her high-water pants. I am saying, how often are we treating ourselves the way we want people to treat us? Most women do not. Just consider how often you look in the mirror and make a face or have a negative thought about yourself, thoughts about your hips, your thighs, that extra bit of fat under your chin or wherever it is that you stare at and think about.
Imagine walking into the office and having your boss walk up to you and compliment the outfit and then follow the compliment with “If only you did not have that fat on your inner thigh! Boy, then you would look great in those pants!” Aside from the fact it would be obvious sexual harassment in your cubicle the idea of someone being that rude is laughable. Yet, you don’t think twice when you say things like that every morning when you try on your clothing.
I once read that the most conversation we have in any given day is with our own selves. We repeat, without mercy, our own perceptions of self as we go about the day. Would you say those thoughts to your child? I have three young girls in my charge. That means I have three people recording my actions on a constant basis so they can learn how to think and feel and act as a woman. I am their role model and coach for the future. I cannot turn in the mirror and act disgusted with that fold of fat that won’t seem to stay hidden behind my bra strap no matter how many times I adjust that strap. I am their voice of reason when the media bombards then to look a certain way when they are older. Yet, I still think those thoughts from time to time and forget just how cruel it is to do to oneself.
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