In an attempt that Intelligent Design (ID) theorists' claim will definitively disprove Darwin's theory, ID proponents will attempt to mate humans and chimpanzees to "empirically test Darwin's theory" in the words of one ID theorist. Under the controversial plan, female volunteers will copulate with male chimpanzees. ID proponents predict that none of the women will become impregnated, thus refuting Darwinism.
The project is a joint endeavor hosted by the Intelligent Design Network (IDN) and the Discovery Institute. Both organizations have been highly critical of Darwinian evolution, arguing that observed complexity indicates the existence of a designer. Critics claim that ID is not a scientific theory. This experiment, project leaders claim, "will prove the scientific grounding of Intelligent Design."
"Evolutionary theory is nothing but a lie," said IDN founder William Harris. "They've been saying man came from monkeys for years. Well, we're about to disprove that. If a monkey can't successfully impregnate a human woman, then we're not related to them."
Current evolutionary theory holds that humans and chimpanzees descend from a common ancestor. Scientists also claim we share roughly 98% of our DNA with chimps. As a counter-argument, Harris and colleagues point to preliminary research showing that a young woman's uncle is not a monkey as supportive of their claims.
"We know God made us special," says Reverend Fred Phelps. "We don't need no fag scientists tellin' us otherwise! But if this will shut those idiots up, then let's do it!" Rev. Phelps' statements were met with a resounding "Hallelujah" from the project team.
The project will begin later this year after a three month screening program to choose the female volunteers. According to the plan, the Discovery Institute and IDN will hold a cross-country interview process similar to that of Fox's reality hit American Idol.