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Satire: The News in Pictures XX

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Welcome to "O Caption! My Caption!", Blogcritics' examination of news, sports, and politics utilizing the most efficient and timesaving method: looking at pretty pictures and deducing what happened based on the pixels.

Let’s go scare the crap out of that old lady who keeps shooting at us.
(M And Y/Caters News/Zuma Press)

I’m telling you, there’s nothing wrong with the plumbing. This
only happens when that Johnson kid comes over to visit.
(Mohammed Alhadab/The Daily Iowan)

The Grim Reaper family enjoys an afternoon outing.
(AP Photo/Gero Breloer)

Dude, turn off the smoke machine.
I did.
Well, then things just got interesting.
(Chris O'Meara/Associated Press)

I didn’t do it! I was fwamed, you gotta beweive me!
(Frank Augstein/AP)

When Condoms Attack
(AP Photo/Lee Jin-man)

This kind of thing happens when you live next door to a hobby shop and leave your windows open. It’s really my fault for leaving leftover Twizzlers on the counter. They always think it’s a landing strip, but of course they never get clearance so they just whiz around up there for a while until it’s time to go back and refuel.
(Rachel Jessen/The Daily Iowan)

Exterminators who watched a lot of Teletubbies
when they were young do things a little differently.

This metaphor would work a lot better for me if the “other end”
didn’t pay for our infrastructure, public education and the military.
( AP Photo/Jim Cole)

An intense search.
(AFP/Getty Images)

So she was all like, “I’ll cut you bitch!” and I was all like, “Oh no you di’n’t, ho!”
(Paul Martinka)

Wow. The child is already in the hospital. Must he
also require a visit to a mental health facility?
(Johnny Hanson/Chronicle)

Ha ha, I love monkeying around with you. Get it?
As soon as we put this crackpot in the van I’m going to kick you. Hard!
(Fabrice Coffrini/AFP/Getty Images)

Did I forget to put on deodorant this morning? No, of course not. I’m only three!
(Getty Images)

EZ my AZ!
(Tina Fineberg/AP)

Sorry. Not one of you is smarter than a piece of furniture. The chair gets the prize.
(Jason Henry)

Hold still. You have a bug on your back!
(Zoo Basel)

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About Diana Hartman

Diana is a USMC (ret.) spouse, mother of three and a Wichita, Kansas native. She is back in the United States after 10 years in Germany. She is a contributing author to Holiday Writes. She hates liver & motivational speakers. She loves science & naps.
  • Nice job. That first one has to be Photoshopped. And I was the squirrel shooter.

  • No, no, That’s the rare (and endangered, I might add) coconut squirrel found only on certain small Malaysian Islands and posh areas in and around Park Slope in Brooklyn. (Although, genetically, I’m told they are actually more closely related to the giant Malvolian Mustard Seed Rat – now extinct.)

    Usually quite playful, they are said to occasionally display an unexpected vicious streak often attacking one and all willy nilly and seemingly without provocation, ramming peoples exposed ankle bones with their extremely hard heads, especially if someone in the vicinity is found to have been drinking a hot Chai Double Skim Mocha Latte.

    They are believed to carry some equally rare diseases including a virus that causes nose polyps in short haired miniature Pomerpoos and deadly hives in certain crustaceans and northern mollusks. No known maladies affecting humans are as yet known.

    The only thing that may have been Photo Shopped is the grass which in Bali has (or so I’m told) more of a pinkish hue.

    Check your local Wikipaedia outlet for more info.


  • Boy, I wasted a really great comment. It just doesn’t pay to dabble in culture.