Thursday , April 18 2024
Talking deer, watchful daffodils, and the high price of fuel.

Satire: The News in Pictures II

Welcome to “O Caption! My Caption!” Blogcritics’ examination of news, sports, and politics by utilizing the most efficient and time-saving method: looking at pretty pictures and deducing what happened based on the pixels.

Archaeologists cleared away the fire and brimstone before putting a surprising discovery on display in a church at Vasteras, Sweden. The salty remains of what is believed to be Jesus Christ were found outside what used to be the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah, challenging biblical accounts of Christ’s first appearance on Earth.

↓ Babies in bathwater are lined up for the ceremonial throwing out of with.

↓ “What do you think we should get?” “I’ve got a hankerin’ for Tequila.” “Fine, then. One bottle of Tequila and a lemon.” “Don’t we need salt?” “No, we have salt.” “You talkin’ ‘bout that salt lick in the forest?” “No, I’m talkin’ ‘bout that Bible character they dug up two pictures ago in this ridiculous photo caption essay.” “Jesus Licking Christ, you’re gonna burn in hell for sure.” “What do I care, I’m a deer.”

↓ Cleverly disguised surveillance cameras keep a watchful eye on the Bank of England in the City of London.

↓ After a particularly nasty fall, a dazed and confused bull rider thinks he’s up to bat at a Texas Rangers game.

↓ The leading representative for Nippers Eradicate Rebel Forces (N.E.R.F.) stands at the ready.

↓ Speaking on condition of anonymity, the very tired mother of 74 brothers said fertility treatment doctors were behaving unethically long before Octuplet Mom Nadya Suleman came along.

↓ The world braces for an onslaught of granted wishes, world peace, and millions of people to deliver on their once-flippant dares now that pigs fly.

↓ Peter Tuplin, of the Royal Air Force Station Thruxton airbase in southern England, became the first pilot in the world to retire in mid-air.

↓ A man awaits a job interview and looks around nervously in the hope that no one notices the Playboy hidden in his copy of Career Builder.

↓ Star light, star bright, first star I weed eat tonight.

↓ Germany’s €4,000,000 ($5,285,098.96) national emergency vehicle fuel allotment didn’t go far.

About Diana Hartman

Diana is a USMC (ret.) spouse, mother of three and a Wichita, Kansas native. She is back in the United States after 10 years in Germany. She is a contributing author to Holiday Writes. She hates liver & motivational speakers. She loves science & naps.

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