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Satire: Ann Coulter Blow Up Doll Flops

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ENCINO, California – The vitriolic blonde, right-wing author, blogger and 9/11 widow basher, Ann Coulter, is the model for a new adult toy, a blow-up doll, which debuted on November 7th, election day, and sales have been a huge disappointment for the manufacturer.

“We thought this was shooting fish in a barrel,” said Jeff Larson, owner of the Encino based Adult Novelty Superstore. “We read the blogs, the fan sites, we know Republican guys have the hots for her, but apparently not enough to buy her doll.”

Yet another disappointment for the Republicans, the Ann Coulter blow up doll.

Although she never approved of the creation of the doll, Larson said there has been no contact from Coulter’s representatives.

The Coulter blow up doll was a manufacturing challenge, a direct result of her skeleton-like appearance and Adam’s apple. “We went back and forth with our manufacturer in Taiwan and trying to get the look right required a little improvising,” Larson explained. “The neck is from a male blow up doll and we had to re-engineer a series of molds to get the look right, well, right for Ann that is.”

The grand total of doll sales was only two units, but recent news dropped that figure down to one. Chad Conrad Castagana, the man arrested for sending threatening letters to Rep. Nancy Pelosi, Jon Stewart and Keith Olbermann, was one of the two buyers.

“I saw that story on the news and as soon as I saw the name, I knew one of the boxes I just shipped would probably be coming back. I don’t think they allow blow up dolls in prison,” Larson said.

Voters sent a signal to the politicians and, apparently, that same signal is being sent to sex toy manufacturers trying to create products attractive to Republicans.

“I can tell you the Michelle Malkin doll we had in the works won’t be introduced to the marketplace anytime soon,” Larson said.

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About Poopy Caca

  • http://www.fifthdentist.blogspot.com The Fifth Dentist

    Love the pictures Poopy. Did you make those yourself?

  • http://silverstarhawk.livejournal.com Jared Wright

    Hahaha, good stuff.

  • http://www.morethings.com/log Al Barger

    This sorry excuse for a story is just more hateful leftwing Poopy. The “PoopyCaca” moniker seems to be well chosen for the quality of the writing.

    There’s no point of satire here. In what way is this a commentary, reflection or skewering of Ann Coulter? You’ve got absolutely nothing here except to say that she’s ugly. But her looks aren’t what she’s selling.

    What she’s selling is ideas, and you have no answer to any of them. I’ll take it then that the best refutation of her ideas that you can come up with is saying that she’s ugly. That’s pretty much the same as admitting that you have absolutely no answer to her.

    Still, I’m sure that leftwingers living on nothing but hate and sarcasm will consider this bit of nothing to be brilliant satire.

  • http://alienboysworld.blogspot.com Christopher Rose

    I don’t think this is satire, although it is somewhat amusing, but there isn’t really another BC category it could have gone under, except possibly news…

  • Ayn Rand Blowup Doll

    This sorry excuse for a story is just more hateful leftwing Poopy.

    Hush there Deal Albert. It’s OK. We don’t care what they think.

  • Dr. Kurt

    Sick, Dude! My libido diminishes at the thought of it. Do you think they could at least sell one to the president of Iran? He’d probably enjoy a little snuggle time with a fellow anti-semitic victim-blaming loon.

  • Baronius

    Al, you have to realize that the Left fears strong women. Coulter, Malkin, Thatcher, Rice, they’re too independent and intellectual. Liberals prefer women like Hillary, who stay in bad marriages while their husbands nail the help. The perfect liberal woman IS a blow up doll: no brains and incapable of carrying a child to term.

  • http://counter-point.blogspot.com Scott

    The award for overblown response of the year goes to Al Barger.

    Well done, Al.

  • http://handyfilm.blogspot.com handyguy

    Baronius’s comment is laughable without being even a bit funny. Quite an accomplishment.

  • steve

    I cant help but agree with you Baronius

  • Baronius

    Well sure, it isn’t like free love was a hard sale for guys. It was women who had to be convinced that consequence-free sex was a good idea. Grab a pop-tart on the way out; give me a call if you need a ride to the clinic. Liberalism made marriage disposable and all holes equal.

    Take two women: one, a confident, intelligent woman who wants marriage and kids and won’t settle for less. Let’s call her Laura. The other one, we’ll call Monica, she’s outgoing, romantic, and naive for a teenager. What kind of an upbringing did each one have? What kind of a man would be attracted to each one?

    Which woman would let herself be treated no better than a blow-up doll by a sexual predator?

  • zingzing

    the left hates strong women! no, the right hates strong women! no, the left works for women’s rights! no, the right works for women’s rights! no, the left hates women! no, the right hates women! the left hates! the right hates! the left! the right! left! right! left! right!

  • http://www.morethings.com/log Al Barger

    Brother Baronius, comment #7 was an outstanding answer to this nonsense story- with more wit in a couple dozen words than the author managed in several hundred.

  • Joe

    I don’t see a problem – they’re bound to out-sell the Helen Thomas sex dolls.

  • George B King III

    O’Reilly wouldn’t touch one. That alone speaks volumes.

  • Ayn Rand Blowup Doll

    Ann Coulter is too intellectual? In my day, plagiarism, misattributions, and opinions served up as fact were actions to be looked down upon.

    She’s doesn’t deserve to carry my support hose.

    Albert dear, we need a new tube of K-Y.

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ Elliott

    That picture of Ann seriously should not have been allowed by the editors…

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ Elliott

    “The perfect liberal woman IS a blow up doll: no brains and incapable of carrying a child to term.”

    ROTFL!

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ Elliott

    “Grab a pop-tart on the way out; give me a call if you need a ride to the clinic. Liberalism made marriage disposable and all holes equal.”

    Dude, that is GREAT!

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ Elliott

    “they’re bound to out-sell the Helen Thomas sex dolls.”

    LOL!

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ Elliott

    Look, PoopyCaca does his little left-wing “satire” every once in a while…and that’s cool. The article itself is never particularly funny, but the comments section is always worth a look.

    And I commend him for that! :)

  • Vincent

    The main problem with the right is they can dish it out but they cant take it. Of course this is a stupid articule but come on its about Ann, it has to be stupid. It’s always funny to see when someone defends Ann by saying the other side is being stupid, mean or is name calling. I wonder if you removed these things for any of Ann’s books what would be left ( nothing) Come on if you cant take it dont throw it.

  • Valery Dawe

    # 11 “Liberalism made marriage disposable and all holes equal.”

    Henry V111 was a Liberal?? Baronius wins the Wallace Simpson inflatable roommate.

  • pleasexcusetheinterruption

    Al, you have to realize that the Left fears strong women.

    I suppose this is why the SOCIALIST party of France just nominated a married, independent, strong, attractive, successful woman, Segolene Royal, to run for President? Makes perfect sense to me..Maybe it’s a french liberal thing. How many other gross generalizations can we come up with?

  • Clavos

    peti, NOTHING the French do is a standard of exemplary, or even sane, behavior.

    Fromage, anyone?

    Mon Dieu!

  • Big Bopper

    Well I’d shag it…..

    Big Bopper.

  • http://www.yahoo.com Frank

    You know, sometimes Ann is just kidding when she says things and because of those things she says, people start talking about issues maybe they normally wouldn’t?

  • johnny five

    you leave my girl friends alone. they would never say anything bad about you. all they do is take it all the time!!