Dick Cheney has made sacrifices for his country. Did you know, when he was tapped for the Vice President position, he was registered as a voter in Texas? That effectively barred him from running for office, as the US constitution prevents president and vice president coming from the same state. But did Dick give up? Did he turn down a job he probably didn't even want? No, unlike some people mentioned in this letter previously, Dick didn't think about himself. He thought about his country! He knows the meaning of the word "sacrifice." So, he took a long and arduous trip to the backwoods of Wyoming to change his voter registration.
That took gumption, not to mention good ole-fashioned American Ingenuity. Traits to be admired, I might add.
A May 2, 2002 report from 'CorpWatch' stated: "Cheney made a fortune in the oil industry when he took over as chief executive of Halliburton, the world's largest oil services company in 1995. In 1998 he took home $4.4 million in salary and benefits and in 1999 he was paid $1.92 million, according to the company's own financial reports. In May 2000 he cashed in 100,000 Halliburton shares to net another $5.1 million and then sold the rest of his shares in August 2000 for $18.5 million, adding up to a total of almost $30 million in just two years, a fortune for a man with no previous experience in running a company, let alone an oil multinational."
It was written by a man - or woman - calling himself (or herself) "Pratap Chatterjee". Sounds Iraqi to me. Or maybe a person from India. Not that there's much difference. They all hate what America stands for, and they all hate Dick.
It's just another example of bashing the CEOs - both former and current - of Corporate America. These people with inferior bank accounts sure like to sling mud. All in yet another attempt to keep the rich white man down. History is filled with such attempts, but hear me and hear me well - We Shall Overcome!
Are we so morally bankrupt that we fault a man for making a buck? If not for that little "nest egg" how do you think Dick would be able to make ends meet now, what with the comparative pittance he's paid as Vice President? You should thank your lucky stars that Dick doesn't have to worry about money, so he can concentrate on the more important issues. Like blowing Iraq back to the Stone Age. And making more money - not just for himself, but also for all the god-fearing Americans he knows personally.
Article comments
1 - san
I love this part, even though it makes no sense, especially at the end.
"He fancies himself a writer but, mostly, he makes stuff up. Real writers don't have to make stuff up. That's why they are called writers!"
Beware exalted novelists of the age: you are not writers!
This whole experiment with Internet terminals in psychiatric hospitals must stop. It's not working out. I understand it was supposed to be therapeutic, but until these people can be trusted with belts and shoelaces, they shouldn't have Internet access.
And I thought it was "Make Fun of the Cheney's" day, not "Humiliate Yourself Via E-Mail" day.
Thanks for the fun.
2 - Eric Olsen
I wonder what our own Kate Sherrod, who lives in Wyoming and "knows" Dick Cheney has to say about all of this.
3 - Craig Diehls
Remember Buddy Hackett? Some people yearn for the past so much they can taste it. We are now going through a phase where these people are in power.
4 - foolio
this one did not have the "USDA Satire" approval label but that is still no reason for you fine folks to have missed that it was satire. (not as entertaining or thought provoking as Eric's "What she really said" post.)
much love to all (especiall satirists)
one big fool