Wanted: New FEMA Chief. No experience necessary

My significant other is between jobs at the moment. But I have no doubt he will find something soon. He's highly respected professional, has a wealth of experience in his field, and has a most impressive resume. Anyone who hires him can be assured he will perform his job with skill and sense, drawing upon the knowledge he has acquired over the years.

Unlike, say, the next employer of defrocked FEMA head, Michael Brown. Brown, who was recently relieved of command of the New Orleans relief effort by the Commander-in-Chief, had no experience in the field, and thus, had acquired no discernable skills. Anyone perusing his resume would have immediately been struck by what it didn't include, most notably, anything which might have equipped him for the job. However, thinking ahead, the ambitious Mr. Brown decided to plug the gaps with some judicious (or, as it turns out, injudicious) padding.

Even so, there is no disguising the fact that Mr. Brown's sole previous experience for helming America's emergency rescue body was his 11 years as--and I couldn't possibly make this up--"the commissioner of judges and stewards for the International Arabian Horse Association".

That's right. The guy who was supposed to co-ordinate and manage the rescue of victims of hurricane Katrina used to work with horses. And he wasn't even in charge of the whole horse organization, only one of its branches.

But maybe I'm being hasty. Maybe supervising horse judges for 11 years was a really rigourous job which put Mr. Brown's managerial skills to the test every day. Maybe keeping tabs on the disparate facets of horse judging was an extremely challenging task which sharpened Mr. Brown's judgment and honed his ability to make quick decisions in difficult circumstances--decisions upon which the lives of horse judges and their judged horses depended.

Let's go directly to the source, shall we, and see exactly what the job involved. Here's how a spokesperson for Mr. Brown's former employer described the position to a reporter from the Boston Herald:

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  • 1 - marc

    Sep 10, 2005 at 4:01 pm

    "had no experience in the field."

    If your willing to discount his performance last year when 4 major storms struck Fla. and the Gulf coast within 6 weeks. A performance that for the most part was praised by most of the press and others.

    But there is a good side, Arabian horses are said to be standing by for their "General" to reassume his previos position.

  • 2 - Jewels

    Sep 10, 2005 at 4:17 pm

    Brown was disliked by many people in the I.A.H.A. (International Arabian Horse Assoc.). I have been a member of I.A.H.A. Am I surprised to be hearing his resume' and creds may not be all he touted them to be? No. He should be out of a job. He'd do well in 'network marketing'...

  • 3 - Victor Plenty

    Sep 11, 2005 at 4:17 pm

    I should put in my resume. I've had conversations with people who raise Arabian horses. Maybe that qualifies me to be the head of FEMA.

  • 4 - scaramouche

    Sep 11, 2005 at 6:36 pm

    Victor Plenty--It might also help if Michael Brown had been your roommate in university.

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