Next we have the taboo pair; Congressman Mark Foley and Senator Larry Craig. Foley, the newspapers said, had once been seduced by a priest when he was in his pre-teens. He went on to live a half-open, half-closeted sexual existence, until he was busted for sending sexually salacious emails to young male congressional pages, resulting in his resignation and disgrace. I don’t think there is enough there for a successful movie. The Craig thing comes close to being movie material, a comedy for sure, but one scene in a stall in a men’s toilet in an airport cannot fill the time required for a full length movie, wide stance or not. Nor does the spectacle of a US senator holding a press conference with his wife at his side declaring that he is not, and has never been, a homosexual. We’d need to know more. It may be odd, but there is no hint of Foley and Craig ever hooking up, politically or otherwise, and until there is some evident of this occurrence, there isn’t a movie here either.
John Edwards was seduced by an ambitious groupie in a weak moment (I like John Edwards) and made to behave in a particularly bad manner. Sexually cheating on a wife sick with cancer is really atrocious and nearly unforgivable for his wife, but completely unforgivable for those of us (like myself) who admired him and had hoped that he would have emerged in some role in the Obama Administration, working to alleviate poverty in America. There are many mysterious elements to this tale, such as is the baby his, but not yet the stuff of a good Love Story movie.
Senator John Ensign screwed his Chief of Staff by screwing his Chief of Staff’s wife. Now that’s some low-life stuff. Then his family paid nearly a hundred grand to the victimized family. That sounds criminal, but no movie here.
Of all the recent cases of political infidelity, Mark Sanford is the purest, and most wonderful; the one which would make a lovely movie. A middle-aged married governor, enchanted by a shapely Argentinean with marriage problems, is struck instantly and insanely with the recognition that she is his “soulmate,” the one person in the entire universe whose existence completes his existence; answers all the mysteries of the galaxies, proves the existence of God and perhaps, teaches him to tango. In the governor’s own words, “This is a Love Story.” And what a tearjerker of a movie it would make. This is also a story with multiple emotional dimensions which will hook the viewer’s interest.
Article comments
1 - roger nowosielski
For some reason, Horace, I happen to think you're speaking with a fork-tongue (and I'm not being critical, mind you; I rather like it).
One clue - in addition to your thoughts on human vulnerability a la Shakespearian tragedy:
"Of course, the movie would have to deal with side issues, such as the governor lying to his staff, disabling the tracking device on his state-owned vehicle, using state money to visit his lover, and explaining about all those other women he admitted “crossing the line” with . . ."
Nice job.
2 - Elvira Black
Very nice job indeed, Horace. I'm as mystified as to why a gov would turn down needed stimulus money as why anyone would so flagrantly ramble on about his private love life for all the world to see, esp when a certain air of, oh, hypocrisy adds such spice to the proceedings...
I smell book/movie deal! Either get it out there first, or contact the gov or his handler's to see what you can work out. If he wrote a book, I think it would need some serious editing, judging by his ramblings and emails.
3 - Baronius
I get your point, but I think that Foley, Edwards, and Spitzer each merit a movie, and McGreevey’s wife’s story would be perfect for Lifetime Network.
4 - Joanne Huspek
Remember this when pitching your movie: you need a compact tag line. Boil down this beautiful article into a sentence, and you're on Easy Street. I'd suspend my usual "I'll wait til it comes out on DVD" just for you.
5 - Baronius
"Sometimes you're so busy running for office...that someone can run away with your heart."
6 - Doug Hunter
"I'm as mystified as to why a gov would turn down needed stimulus money"
Probably for the same reason I wouldn't take money from the mafia... too many strings attached and a feeling that once you've made a deal with the devil you'll never be through with it. On the other, it's actually much worse than the mafia scenario because you have to pay for it at the point of a gun, whether you elect to take it or not. (not to mention there is no law to turn to because they are the law)
7 - Elvira Black
Nice one, Baronius!
8 - Silas Kain
"Sometimes you're so busy running for office...that someone can run away with your heart."
Hmmm. I guess running away with one's heart is better than stuffing one's wallet with special interest money.
As far as Mark Sanford goes, I love his "transparency". It's refreshing to know that a few Republicans of the Far Right actually have romantic urges. I wish the GOP and the media would just get off the personal life shtick. What a politician performs in the confines of his/her bedroom should just stay under the sheets. Keep it out of airport mens rooms and the Enquirer.
9 - Clavos
What a politician performs in the confines of his/her bedroom should just stay under the sheets. Keep it out of airport mens rooms and the Enquirer.
That discriminates against exhibitionists.
Don't they have rights, too?
10 - Silas Kain
Good point, Clavos. I rescind my statement. Exhibitionists are people, too. And besides there are quite a few that I'd love to see in action. I'll leave that to your warped imagination.
11 - Clavos
Wait, wait, Silas, I've only just begun!
Don't get ahead of me here!
12 - Silas Kain
Oh, Dear God, I've unleashed the beast within Clavos. Now which of the four horsemen would this be?
13 - Dr Dreadful
It's little known that there are actually five Horsemen - Death, War, Famine, Pestilence, and Derek. They never really found a job for Derek. It's hard to take you seriously when instead of a mighty steed with flaming eyes and flashing hooves you get a Shetland pony to ride.
(Damn, I'm writing a book blurb, aren't I? Promising. Excuse me for a year and a half or so...)
14 - Baronius
Huh. What would the fifth horseman do? It would have to be something trivial enough to leave out of the Bible, but still some kind of burden to mankind. I got it - Windows Vista!