I’m sick and tired of all the hand-wringing and whining going on in the liberal media over the supposed “crisis” in Burma. Seriously, who cares? Let the Burmese worry about Burma, I always say.
Here’s a typical example of the kind of biased reporting I’m talking about, from the Daily Mail:
[T]he bodies of hundreds of executed monks have been dumped in the jungle …
Well, yeah, duh. There’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for that. Only the blood of monks can quench the thirst of the mighty teak tree. And teak is one of Burma's major exports, to make futons and stuff. Therefore, this is simply a logical extension of that country's farm policy. Don’t these journalistic fools know anything about basic agriculture?
The most senior official to defect so far, Hla Win, said: "Many more people have been killed in recent days than you've heard about. The bodies can be counted in several thousand."
Oh, cry me a river. Sounds like a typical weekend in Detroit, or Newark.
Reports from exiles along the frontier confirmed that hundreds of monks had simply "disappeared" …
So? Even Buddhist monks need to take a vacation every once in a while. They probably all went to Bangkok for some much needed R&R. Monking can be a very difficult and stressful job.
A Swedish diplomat who visited Burma during the protests said last night that in her opinion the revolution has failed.
Liselotte Agerlid, who is now in Thailand, said that the Burmese people now face possibly decades of repression. "The Burma revolt is over," she added.
Well, it’s comforting to know that at least Europe has already given up.
"People are scared and the general assessment is that the fight is over. We were informed from one of the largest embassies in Burma that 40 monks in the Insein prison were beaten to death today and subsequently burned."
Article comments
— go to most recent comments1 - meemalee
Far from being "satire", this article is actually incredibly offensive.
I'm not talking about the parts which are obviously meant to be "humorous" - I'm referring to the serious points which I believe you are trying to make:
"They’ve had a military dictatorship for like, what, 45 years or something? So I guess the people there must really like that form of government, to have kept it all this time"
The military junta seized power in a military coup in 1962 and have ruled as a dictatorship ever since. In 1990 in the only election allowed during this period, the opposing National League for Democracy won with a landslide 80%+ of the vote but the election was annulled and the NLD leader was put under house arrest (and has been for over a decade).
Each time the Burmese has tried to overthrow the junta since then (most notably on 8.8.88), it has responded by slaughtering unarmed civilians.
No-one "likes" the dictatorship, except the dictators themselves.
"Western values (like democracy and free speech and non-butchery of unarmed protesters)"
These are not "Western values". These are basic human rights which are being denied to the Burmese.
Please think a little longer before you speak lightly of such issues.
2 - Ruvy in Jerusalem
RJ,
Sometimes even droll humor crosses the line. I know the point you are trying to get across - but it just don't work. Massacres and rivers of blood are never funny....
3 - YeHtut
When some people come in to your house, shoot your brother, take his computer, and they say 'if you make your move, you mother will be next'.
And no one knows your brother's death. Coz, he was burnt in crematorium before no one can confirm that he is dead.
Then you will understand.
4 - JHK
This is not only offensive, it's bad humour. Sorry to say..
5 - Simon
There is a fine line between humour and being offensive. Unfortunately for you and the rest of us, you've fallen very short of being funny.
Writing what you like under the label of satire may cover your backside, but it lets everyone know from the outset you are a bit of a coward.
6 - Iain
This is not satire.
Please remove the actual photo of a murdered monk. If you ever have to go through the horror of having a family member of friend murdered whilst standing up for freedom and justice I'm sure the last thing you would want is to see their photo on a blog like this.
Tasteless.
7 - Buphus
Badly-written and offensive, whatever point you were trying to make.
8 - Dave
Oops, looks like your phone number and address can be found by searching for your e-mail address.
I hope it doesn't end up on the support burma group with 270,000 members!!!
9 - Sophie
i'd say i have a fairly healthy borderline dark sense of humour but this is sick. tasteless, insensitive and utterly ignorant. arsehole.
10 - Doug Hunter
I think your post brought up valid points. Nothing is so sacred as to not be subject to criticism or satire. Good job! (Now hide those personal details before some nutjob starts harassing you)
11 - troll
this: *Anyway, who are we to impose our own personal, subjective beliefs upon the proud people of Burma? Surely, attempting to impose Western values (like democracy and free speech and non-butchery of unarmed protesters) at the point of a gun would be nothing more than cultural imperialism. Interfering in the government affairs of a sovereign nation like Burma would require unmatched arrogance on our part. (And I suspect some of the people most loudly calling for action against Burma secretly have an eye on that country's massive rice reserves.)*...is the core of the article and is satirical
the rest reads kinda like...well...like comparing a blown up vet to a thalidomide baby
RJ - are you in therapy for that ol' personality disorder - ?
12 - Wagaung
What an obvious example of the gross injustice of this world that some subhuman specimen like this one would probably not suffer the same fate as those incredibly brave and selfless fallen monks of Burma?
13 - meemalee
poster #14 (troll) - you're completely right - the part you've quoted is satirical when quoted in isolation, but the rest of the post is in just bad taste.
As for the photo of the monk used to "illustrate" this article, if you look at the jpeg's properties, you'll see that it's been "hilariously" named by the blogger
"deadmonktryingtoswim"
14 - bliffle
Satire depends on a humorous exposition of some idea through exaggeration, but the author of this article seems utterly humorless. Thus, the article just ends up sounding bitter and shrill.
15 - Ruvy in Jerusalem
JR
I've read many satire magazines. I'm sorry, kid, this is the kind of thing that gets ripped up before ever seeing the printer. This is one of the real dangers of running a magazine of this kind.
I'm not writing to criticize you. I think you've figured out that you've done far better work by now. But you've seriously hurt people by what you have written here.
And who the hell edited this piece? Editors are there to do more than just make sure the graphics, links and spelling work! There are some rare instances when communicating with the writer and telling him/her that piece is not appropriate for publication and suggesting serious changes is also part of the job.
"i have your details cocksucker and i'm coming to get you....."
Who knows? You might just save he writers life.
16 - Lumpy
beautifully swiftian. if you can piss off this many idiots you're doiing something right. pity they aren't bright enough to direct their rage at the right target.
17 - Silver Surfer
Dave: "I hope it doesn't end up on the support burma group with 270,000 members!!!"
Facebooking for bad taste.
18 - Dave Nalle
People. Satire is not funny. It inspires uncomfortable laughter. This article certainly fits the definition of satire because it illustrates the outrageousness of the situation in Burma, not because it's humorous in any way.
It troubles me that there are people out there so literal minded that they don't see the difference between satirizing something and endorsing it.
Dave
19 - Silver Surfer
Maybe they do, but they just think RJ's piece is bollocks (sorry RJ, but you know, there's only one thing worse than having people talking about you ...)
I didn't expect humour, didn't find any, and didn't think it was the kind of thing that should be satirised anyhow.
That's just me, though.
20 - Ray Ellis
Your crude attempt at trying to draw an analogy between mass murders in Burma and our involvement in Iraq makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.Further, it's utterly tasteless, and smacks of a disregard not only for Buddhists, but all people who place human rights above personal agendas.
If the regard for human rights has become so diluted that we can't see beyond an "I'm alright, Jack" mentality, we're in serious trouble as a dominant species on this planet.