President-Elect, The Reality Show

The Magical Hanukkahtime Section Variety Hour is an eight-day cruise through every section at BC Magazine except the one where the author has any knowledge whatsoever. On the seventh evening: BC Politics!

We sure had a fun election. We had mudslinging, backstabbing, rumor-mongering, and camera-winking. Barack Obama gathered more votes than John McCain, and the country will change thusly. I guess that's one way to pick our president, but a lot of people were clamoring that these two were not really the best candidates our system has to offer. Heck, even Obama himself said that college football shouldn't be limited to two teams with a chance to win it all. You've got pundits out there demanding legitimate third parties to be put on the ballot, and voter turnout could always be higher. But most folks only get a chance to usher in one of two fine Americans.

Meanwhile, American Idol is raking in the Nielsen ratings while churning out star after consistently talented star. And the only industry to piggyback on the success of this model is other reality shows. (Well, at least the ones that don't have access to bimbos willing to take their clothes off.)

The concept just might be the thing to pick a president out of a larger talent pool. That way Washington outsiders can actually be more than a one-term U.S. senator. They can be computer programmers, welders, insurance salesmen, or NBA studio analysts. We'll never know if they have what it takes unless we give them the means to convey their message to registered voters who hate the Internet.

Here's the rough draft of the idea, while TV producers, think tanks, and lobbyists are allowed to fill in the logistical details, with all proceeds deposited into my checking account:

Applicants would try out in local debates, get voted into larger debates, and so forth, until about April of the election year, in which 11 candidates are featured in the nationally-televised premiere of President-Elect. The field is whittled down every four weeks when the lowest vote-getter is eliminated. How do they prove themselves? Well, challenges throughout the electoral season include:

Article Author: Matthew T. Sussman

Sussman is the sports editor of BC Magazine and the executive editor of Technorati. He also writes for Deadspin and Toledo Free Press. He and Tuffy can be heard hosting the Treehouse Fort, Sundays at 12 noon ET. Plus, he Twitters. …

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