For those so inclined, there is an article that painstakingly, soberly, fascinatingly details a North Korea "on the verge of collapse," as "entering its death throes," a country whose children are 20% shorter and lighter than their contemporaries in South Korea after years of malnutrition, a country whose economy has been dying since the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991
This is not that article.
Instead I would rather talk about what an unhinged loony fuckwad "Dear Leader" Kim Jong Il is. As his people starve, freeze, and prepare for the chaos of collapse, Kim is worried about their hair:
- The short-hair campaign actually was launched in October, but it reached new lengths Monday when state-run Central TV began ridiculing nonconformists as unhygienic, anti-socialist fools. It comes as North Korea's dictatorship struggles to tighten its control over information, monitor its population and dictate cultural tastes.
State TV even derided violators of the order by name and address, calling them "blind followers of bourgeois lifestyle," and exposing them to jeers from other citizens.
"We cannot help questioning the cultural taste of this comrade, who is incapable of feeling ashamed of his hair style," the station said Monday, showing a man identified as Ko Gwang Hyun, whose unkempt hair covered his ears.
"Can we expect a man with this disheveled mind-set to perform his duty well?" the announcer asked.
....Among the campaign's hairdos and don'ts: Hair must be kept no longer than two inches. The only exception is for older men, who are given an extra four-fifths of an inch to hide baldness.
The dictum claims that long hair hampers brain activity by taking oxygen away from nerves in the head.
North Korea's campaign does not mention any rules for women and gives no explanation as to why their long hair would not result in reduced brain activity.
Article comments
1 - Joe
I just read this article by Nicholas Kristof that dovetails nicely with this, here.
There's kind of a (for lack of a better term) poignant mention of Lil' Kim's son trying to get into Japan with a fake passport to visit Disneyland Tokyo. In a former career I had several opportunities to visit South Korea and apply some scrutiny and analysis to the goings on in the DPRK. I think they're finally on the brink of collapse, but that's what I was saying ten years ago, too.
2 - Eric Olsen
thanks Joe! that article does the job for sure, with facts and insight and logic and stuff, unlike this one
3 - Joe
Oh no, I think it supports the larger premise of how eff'ed up the cult of personality is. Actually, Kim hasn't appeared in public for a few months and there's speculation of some type of coup or overthrow. As they're action's invite all sorts of conspiracy, I'd throw in mine: that Kim recently underwent chemo-therapy or is going bald which has brought on the regime's sudden interest in sportin' a tight 'do.
4 - Tim Hall
North Korea is less a nation than a nutball religious cult. Think Waco, Texas, only with nukes.
5 - Eric Olsen
a religion draining adherents
6 - sapere aude
Yes, it is now illegal to have long hair in N. Korea. But N. Koreans have always been funny that way. I heard the rats taste great in that country-- it's all in the marinade.
7 - RJ
A military coup would be a wonderful thing, methinks. Some rational (though autocratic) leadership there might actually end this crisis.
8 - Al Barger
No one knows what it's like to be the bad man, to be the sad man beneath the short bouffant. Doesn't quite have the ring of The Who, I suppose.
Perhaps we could just settle for a little chorus of "I'm So Ronery."
9 - Eric Olsen
there is a severe disconnect between the bizarre buffoonery of the leadership and its mind-bogglingly stilted and retarded propaganda machine (which sounds like John Candy in Volunteers) and the very real danger of its military capabilities and nuclear threat - it's much more fun to focus on the buffoonery
10 - Dawn
The funniest thing ever is seeing little Korean boys with these nubby haircuts. It reminds me of kiwi fruits - or adolescent nutsacks.
In a way, that sort of describes Kim Jong Il: an adolescent nutsack.
11 - Eric Olsen
that'll be the next post!
12 - L. Cue
careful Dawn, your real close to "Tsunami Song" territory, would hate to see blgocrtics get heat from Asian Media Watch for that little Korean boy haricut/nutsack comment....
I'll never look at a Korean man the same after that comment...nutsack haircut..(LMAOAAOI=laughing my azz off and ashamed of it)
13 - HW Saxton
Yeah, but just think of all publicity!!!
Just joking. It was a pretty funny rip
but it's an ultra-fine line between just
tasteless and racially hateful.