Officials from the San Diego County Health and Human Services Agency were at a loss to explain why a four-hour session was unattended by those it needed feedback from and intends to help. The session was one of a series conducted by agency officials, held to assess the best way to spend millions of dollars in fiscal year 2009 to meet the mental health needs of the military, former military, and their families.

About 30 people attended last Tuesday’s forum. Of these, there were mental health providers, veterans’ advocates, and those who work for agencies that deal directly with war veterans. To open the forum, Alfredo Aguirre, director of the county’s adult and children’s mental health department said, “This is an opportunity to focus specific resources for this (military) population." Aguirre said this to a room void of those to whom he was speaking.

In a North County Times article about the meeting before it was held, forum leaders said they knew why military servicemembers don’t seek services (i.e.: because they want to avoid being stigmatized and avoid adverse effects on their career; because they don’t know what’s wrong). Still, the forum leaders were flummoxed by the lack of military participation. I’m flummoxed by the inability to connect the dots.

I can explain why they (and some of those from their Commands) didn’t show up - and you (forum leaders) don’t even have to ask. There’s reason one why you had no-shows. You didn’t ask. You told them to come to you - even after saying you had knowledge and understanding of servicemember hesitation and refusal to seek services, and even after saying you were aware of Command neglect.

Those who work with the homeless, substance abusers, and abused children know you cannot reasonably expect those in need to first meet your desire. It’s telling enough that you couldn’t be bothered with going to them. Must you then also express what can only be described as insincere bewilderment?

You know the answers to your own questions. You said as much before the meeting, and still you don’t know what to do next. That’s such a bungled approach, one wonders if you aren’t all students of the federal government. Those in need may well not know they’re in need, but as educated, experienced, and trained persons of the help professions, why don’t you know?

What you’ve done (and what has been done by many civilian and military “help” agencies) is the opposite of a magician pulling a rabbit from a hat. Those in need are tired of their problems reappearing before their very eyes - unsolved and unresolved after each and every assist.

Article Author: Diana Hartman

Diana (nee Gulick) Hartman is a freelance writer, mother of three, and a (Ret.) U.S. Marine spouse. She is a Wichita, Kansas native and currently resides in Böblingen, Germany. She is a contributing writer to Holiday Writes.

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