Well, it appears as if the future of Lebanon's government is in the hands the people. And I'm not talking about democratic elections, no no, my friend, I'm talking about American Idol-style popularity. Ryan Seacrest has expressed little interest in moderating the civil unrest, however, so the Lebanese people have had to abandon their text messaging campaigns in favor of a more traditional approach.
Since former Prime minister Hariri was killed four weeks ago there have been multiple rallies expressing either anti- or pro-Syrian sentiment. The first major rally in Martyrs Square demanded a full pull-out by the Syrian military. Another rally last week, organized by Hezbulla and much larger than the previous week's gathering, showed support for the Syrian-backed government in Lebanon. And finally, today the largest gathering to date amassed to again turn the tide of visible public opinion, demanding a full Syrian pull-out of Lebanon.
Reached for comment, Randy Jackson said of the latest demonstrators, "You know, it was hot, dog. You got shown up last week, but you really hooked it up this week."
Only time will tell if yet another, larger pro-Syrian rally will take place to sway public opinion back. Until then, it's all up to the American viewing public. The numbers to call, according to FOX, are:
1-800-SYRIA-NO
1-800-SYRIA-YES
Phone lines will be open after tonight's evening news broadcasts.
Reuters: Anti-Syrian Protesters Flood Lebanese Capital
THIS POST IS SATIRE, FOR ALL THOSE WHO ARE GOING TO TAKE IT SERIOUSLY AND BE ANGRY.
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Article comments
1 - Eric Olsen
very nice Travis, it's just not that far from the truth - all the players involved know this is being played out in the world "Idol" court of public opinion
2 - RJ
This is truly incredible, when you look at the numbers. Over 500,000 raving lunatics show up at a pro-Syria demonstration, and then over 750,000 protestors show up at an anti-Syria rally. Both rallies were within, what? 10 days of each other?
And Lebanon has less than 4 million total residents!
Presumably, both rallies were pretty much mutually exclusive.
So you've got over 30% of the population in the streets between these two rallies!
While Lebanon may not be truly democratic (yet), they are procticing a form of "street democracy" which is a magnificient thing to behold...
3 - Dave Nalle
Those huge numbers may be somewhat off. No one has managed to do a legit count. However the Hezbollah demonstration today only pulled about 2000 protestors, so either they've used up the last of the Saddam's money, or something funky is going on.
Dave
4 - Eric Olsen
they had enough cash to shoot one impressive wad, but that appears to be it, although I don't think Syria is finished with trying to destroy themselves via Lebanon