How to Lose a City in Ten Steps; Part Six: Anchoring an Unlawful Ship

Without any discernible means of employment, the illegals who just stepped out of the bus, minivan, or freight train are fuming. To think that they came all this way to be told that no positions are available is enough to force a few into fits of rage.

Fortunately for them, though, illegals who arrived at a more industrious time speak of how fraudulent credentials can be attained. For a fee, everything from drivers licenses to Social Security cards are available. Since almost all of the new arrivals are penniless, many turn to violent crime in order to earn the money for their necessary IDs. Eventually, they scrounge up enough cash and soon enough find themselves of well forged documents. These are then used to apply for public assistance programs, which function as a serviceable alternative to standing on an assembly line.

Even though many taxpayer subsidized illegals are able to hold their own, in the absence of an actual job they are simply bored sitting around the house or apartment day in and day out. As they typically come from cultures in which large families are the norm, and a child born on American soil is granted automatic citizenship, not an instant is wasted in bearing little ones. This fosters a perplexing scenario; illegal aliens raising their legal offspring in a social enclave of the former's homeland. Only in the United States.

The police department is still trying to find a way to dance around their overseers in city government. Election day is not far off, however, and the voters are monumentally steamed. In order to cool them off, a majority of councillors allow the police to deviate from the failed hands off policy. The chieftains over at the factories, who really run the entire show, have no opposition. Seeing as they are no longer actively hiring, and their minions will surely instruct the cops to steer clear of the plants, they have nothing to lose.

A team of detectives do extensive fieldwork and find that the facts on the ground have changed tremendously since they last attempted to tackle the illegal alien crisis. Now, a terribly frightening development has taken place, triggering step six.

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Article Author: Joseph F. Cotto

Joseph F. Cotto is a scholar and columnist from central Florida. Most often writing about political affairs, he is a member of the all-but-extinct Rockefeller wing of the Republican Party, taking conservative stances on fiscal and national security …

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  • 1 - Glenn Contrarian

    Mar 17, 2012 at 2:03 am

    It would be nice, Joseph, if you provided even a single solid example. It shouldn't be that hard, even, because even though I strongly disagree with your multitude of evidence-free assumptions in this series, you should be able to find one or two communities in, say, Texas or Arizona that could provide at least a ghost of an excuse for your assumptions (even though I'm very confident that the experiences of the vast majority of American cities have a FAR different story to tell).

    But you're not even doing that.

  • 2 - the beginning of the end

    Mar 19, 2012 at 2:05 am

    The fools on the far left and the pukes that pretend to be republicans are going to destroy us in a few short years

    Immigration, World Poverty and Gumballs

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