"Breaking The Silence: Children's Stories" is a documentary airing on PBS that brings much-needed attention to the plight of abused mothers who are trying to protect their abused children from their abusive fathers. The American Judges Association has reported that "studies show that batterers have been able to convince authorities that the victim is unfit or undeserving of sole custody in approximately 70% of challenged cases."…
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— go to most recent comments76 - Julia(member of NANCM)
Arizona dad,
I tried to go to your group but kept receiving a DNS error; please email me the link from your group; i would be interested in participating in this chat.
77 - Adryenn Ashley
Larry said:
"There should be a study of how many daughters grew up without fathers around so they don't know how to engage in a healthy relationship (bonding to any man that pays them attention)..."
I did that study as my thesis in college. I surveyed only daughters of single mothers and found that there was a significant reduction in: self esteem, ability to maintain relationships with men, and understanding and acquisition of the skills needed for long term relationships. The women surveyed were all raised by single mothers without any involvement with their fathers, nor were their mothers remarried. What I heard over and over was that they longed for a husband, but upon interviewing them after the survey, found that they had unrealistic expectations of the men they wanted.
The interesting aspect of this is that single daughters of single fathers had significant difficulty establishing relationships with women, and had trust issues.
Basically I think the outcome is that without unrestricted unfettered access to both FIT parents, children will have less positive outcomes. It doesn't matter if its fatherlessness or motherlessness. The fact is that women have the majority of sole custody, so it is easier to study the outcomes for fatherlessness. If the gender bias was reversed, we'd see similar outcomes. What kids NEED is to know that THEY can see who they need when they need and not be given a hard time about it. Those children have similar (nearly identical) outcomes as children from in tact families.
So, I think the key is to accurately define abuse in terms of the kind that can affect children and vigorously protect them from that. But as a woman, I do not have the constitutional right to not be insulted. If I don't get along with my husband that's not ALL his fault. If he's a jackass, and I married him, and I had kids with him, that's not ALL his fault.
But if one parent has a temper, that parent should get help, regardless if its the mom or dad. If BOTH parents are required to go to counseling for communication to reduce the occurance of conflict, that would reduce the incidence of violence. Why are we willing to let things go til the last minute? Why are we not out there recruiting women who are unhappy in their marriages and teach them the skills they need to be happy in the marriage they have?
We have to get over this win at all costs way of divorcing. This means men AND women. I know plenty of women who got royally screwed, and I mean are in desperate need now, who used to be millionaires. Their husbands scammed the court. The court either went along or looked the other way or was negligent. Or the attorney violated their oath and should be disbarred. None of that is happening. Why are those women still in poverty? Greed.
It goes both ways. As long as we allow women to exploit the system for financial gain, women are going to be hurt when the men figure out the rules of the winning strategy and turn the tables. Lets change the rules and not allow ANYONE to exploit our children.
78 - MOM
here
Volunteers Combine Efforts to Raise Attorneys Fees for Appeal for 9-year-old Girl
A group of volunteers focused on child advocacy is actively recruiting members nationally to help raise money for attorneys fees in an unusual way -- by selling candy bars.
(PRWEB) October 27, 2005 -- Kandy 4 Keyarah is a nationally growing grassroots group of volunteers who are organizing to raise attorneys fees for Keyarah's appeal through selling candy bars and hosting benefits events. With volunteer representatives in Illinois, Ohio, Kentucky, Georgia, Florida, Washington and Colorado, they are actively seeking volunteers to lead the growing effort in other states as well. ?We will not stop until we see justice served,? said Ava Ivy, Illinois Volunteer Leader, ?and this child returned to her home. We will reach our goal, if we have to, one candy bar at a time.?
One such benefit event is a Koncert 4 Keyarah! Benefit Concert scheduled for November 19, 2005, at 1 p.m., at the Westin O'Hare Hotel, 6100 North River Road, Rosemont, Illinois, which will hopefully raise money for Keyarah's appeal fund as well as raise awareness of this growing problem within the nation's family courts system. This kick off activity in the Chicagoland area will spotlight Keyarah, a 9-year old girl, an unfortunate victim caught up in court actions within the family courts system between Washington and Kentucky states. Keyarah?s biological father was granted sole custody. According to Keyarah?s mother, Darla LeNoir, a disabled army veteran diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 1997, she just wants justice served and family law adhered to. ?I haven?t been able to speak to my daughter via telephone since January of this year, and I?ve only been allowed to see her twice with a supervisor present ? and that was in July,? she said. ?I just want to make sure my child is safe and happy.?
79 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Adrynne, that sounds like an interesting study. Did you account for the types of fathers who were no longer present in these children's lives? Why where they no longer there? What was the quality of the relationship the father had with the mother while they were still together, and why was he no longer in the picture?
Could their reasons for abandoning their children have influenced their children's views? It's highly unlikely that forcing a father who wishes to abandon his daughters would change their point of view towards men and relationships if he were forced to maintain a relationship with them. If a man who does not want any involvement with his children is forced for one reason or another to remain in contact with them, wouldn't it stand to reason that these men would not be happy about the arrangement? And that dissatisfaction would influence their daughter's views?
How old were the women? Were they college-aged, like you? Did you take into consideration the life changes they were going through as they entered college (if they were in college), as in growing into young women, moving out of the house for the first time, going to college and the stress that accompanied it? If they were not in college, did you take into account the period of life they were living in? The stress of a new job, living on their own as young adults, trying to obtain credit in their name for the first time, serious relationships for the first time in their late teens and twenties, possibilities for the first time of actually becoming engaged and getting married, and the stress that goes along with those life changes, etc.?
How long of a period of time did you study these young women? Did you account for economics (poverty, class, race, etc.)? Did you account for the education levels of the mothers? Did you account for the education levels of the daughters?
I think your study likely shown a case of correlation does not equal causation. There are many reasons why young women may not have the kinds of views of men and relationships that you described in a single parent setting, but study after study has shown that the most important factors regarding child and young adult well-being are the economics, the mother's education level, and the life satisfaction of the mother. Isaacs, Montalvo, and Abelson found that "the cumulative body of social science research does not support the presumption that frequent and continuing access by both parents lies at the core of the child's best interest. What counts is not the quantity of time, but the extent to which the access parent and child have a relationship in which the child feels valued. The regularity and predictability of visits is more important than frequency of visits."
,
80 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Adrynne, I just realized that I came across a bit too dry in my comment to you. I'm really interested in your study. I'd like to hear more about it. I tend to ask a lot of hard questions when it comes to any study, no matter who does it. I still think it might be a case of correlation vs. causation, but I'd like to hear more from you.
81 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Mom, do you have any other information about that case other than the press release? I get press releases from moms all the time, and they usually don't give enough information. I need more information about that case if I'm going to determine if it's worth looking into further, and then forwarding it on to my colleagues. It's easiest to just e-mail me the info. You can find my e-mail address on my blog. My blog is linked at my name at the top of this post.
82 - Arizonadad
To Julia:
All I can tell you is I dont know what a dns error is, Just keep trying.
The first meeting turned out just as I expected, not a single damned one of the more than 50 people I personally invited showed up, This makes it very clear why their marriages broke up, they can not commit to marriage why expect them to comit to doing something that could help all of our children! What a waste all of these loud mouth do nothings are.
83 - Arizonadad
The DNS error may be that for some reason it may need to be typed in differently Try link
84 - MOM
Isn't it ironic that fathers praise judges for finding mothers such as Brigette Marks guilty of PAS yet they do not want to commend judges for finding fathers guilty of abuse. The Marks case is a textbook example of how fathers use these claims of PAS to take children away from moms who are only seeking to protect the children. Also the fathers praise the custody evaluators for accusing the mothers of PAS, then turn around and accuse these same judges and evaluators of being biased if they go against fathers and want them kicked off the bench or jailed. If these experts are so wise and wonderful where is the praise when they go against dads?
85 - Robert Brown
I believe that how men and women treat each other will be reflected in their treatment of their children. Most unbiased studies show men and women batter each other at about an equal rate. Gender-feminists have been quite successful at having the facts hidden. The following scholarly study is one example.
REFERENCES EXAMINING ASSAULTS BY WOMEN ON THEIR SPOUSES OR MALE PARTNERS: AN ANNOTATED BIBLIOGRAPHY
Martin S. Fiebert
Department of Psychology
California State University, Long Beach
SUMMARY: This bibliography examines 174 scholarly investigations: 138 empirical studies and 36 reviews and/or analyses, which demonstrate that women are as physically aggressive, or more aggressive, than men in their relationships with their spouses or male partners. The aggregate sample size in the reviewed studies exceeds 163,800.
86 - Robert Brown
Dr. Fiebert's complete study may be found at: link
87 - Robert Brown
WOMEN ARE MAJORITY OF PERPETRATORS OF CHILD ABUSE AND NEGLECT
�Child Maltreatment 2003� is available on the Children�s Bureau website: link
Who are the perpetrators of child abuse and neglect? Who typically abuses and neglects children?
Answer
Most States define perpetrators of child abuse and neglect as parents and other caretakers� (such as relatives, babysitters, and foster parents) who have harmed a child in their care. It is important to note that States define the term �caretaker� differently. Harm caused to a child by others (such as acquaintances or strangers) may not be considered �child abuse� but rather may be considered a criminal matter.
According to the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System�s most current report, �Child Maltreatment 2003,� of the approximately 906,000 child abuse and neglect victims in 2003, the largest percentage of perpetrators (79.7 percent) were parents, including birth parents, adoptive parents, and stepparents. Other relatives accounted for an additional 6.4 percent, residential staff for .2 percent, and day care providers for .8 percent. Unmarried partners of parents accounted for 4 percent of perpetrators while foster parent accounted for .5 percent of perpetrators.
In 2003, 58.2 percent of child abuse and neglect perpetrators were females and 41.8 percent were males. For the most part, female perpetrators were younger than male perpetrators; of the women who were perpetrators, 43.8 percent of females were younger than 30 years of age as compared to 33.1 percent of males.
Approximately 83.9 percent of victims were abused by at least one parent. An estimated 40.8 percent of child victims were maltreated by their mothers acting alone; another 18.8 percent were maltreated by their fathers acting alone; 16.9 percent were abused by both parents. Victims abused by nonparental perpetrators accounted for 13.4 percent of the total.
88 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
It doesn't surprise me that fathers' rights activists feel very threatened by this documentary. It will go a long way to show how Parental Alienation Syndrome is junk science being used as a weapon by abusive and angry and controlling men against their ex-partners. The American Psychological Association has come out against alienation. Bold emphasis is mine. This is from the APA's website:
It is also not true that women and men are equally abusive. Fiebert's list, which was just copy/pasted here, has been circulating on men's and fathers' rights web sites and mailing lists for years to insinuate that women are just as abusive as men. It simply is not true. Those studies overwhelmingly use the problematic Conflict Tactic Scales (CTS) to come to their conclusions. Measuring the Extent of Woman Abuse in Intimate Heterosexual Relationships: A Critique of the Conflict Tactics Scales, by Walter Dekeseredy, describes numerous problems with the methodology of the CTS. There is also "The Problem With Proxy Measures: The Inaccuracy of the Conflict Tactic Scales and Other Crime Surveys in Measuring Intimate Partner Violence by Joan Zorza, Esq.", which was published in Domestic Violence Report in 2001. It's not available online. It reiterates many of the same concerns as the DeKeseredy article. Domestic Violence Report is very well respected in the legal community. It has a wide circulation, and it's articles have great impact on how the courts operate.
While it has its uses, the CTS should not be misused to "prove" that women and men are equally abusive. No one in the medical establishment with any credibility, nor anyone in the domestic violence community, buys the men's/fathers' rights line that women and men are equally abusive.
Regarding child abuse, what should be looked at is the amount of time mothers vs. fathers spend with children. Despite spending considerably less time with children than do mothers, fathers do a substantial amount of child abuse. Also, mother are most often cited for neglect. Fathers are most often cited for abuse. Child abuse should not be condoned no matter who does it. This documentary takes a good, hard look at one population that does it - abusive fathers. Abused children and the mothers who are trying to protect them finally have found a voice with this documentary. All the child abuse statistics related to mothers won't change or negate that.
Spamming and trolling comments here with cut/pastes of documents found on men's/fathers' rights web sites about child abuse by women and propaganda about women being as abusive as men does not negate from "Breaking The Silence: Children's Stories". Finally, word is getting out to the public, to legislators, and to court personnel about the serious problem of abused children being awarded to the custody of their abusive fathers. Fathers' rights activists don't like that, and they have been attacking this documentary before it even aired.
89 - silverside
Re: Stats on child abuse. Trish is correct, that women make up a disproportionately high number of primary caregivers, and most of them are that way, not due to any custody challenge, but just because the father is absent or does not care to be the caregiver. This is especially true of single, low-income teen moms. Given that the stats on single parenthood are heavily weighed toward this demographic group, it is no surprise that they make up a disproportionate percentage of abusers. But guess what? When kids are in SINGLE-FATHER HOUSEHOLDS, they are EVEN MORE LIKELY TO BE ABUSED.
From NIS 3rd National Incidence Study:
Family Structure. Children of single parents were at higher risk of physical abuse and of all types of neglect and were overrepresented among seriously injured, moderately injured, and endangered children. Compared with their counterparts living with both parents, children in singleparent families had:
a 77% greater risk of being harmed by physical abuse (using the stringent Harm Standard) and a 63% greater risk of experiencing any countable physical abuse (using the Endangerment Standard);
an 87% greater risk of being harmed by physical neglect and a 165% greater risk of experiencing any countable physical neglect;
a 74% greater risk of being harmed by emotional neglect and a 64% greater risk of experiencing any countable emotional neglect;
a 220% (or more than three times) greater risk of being educationally neglected;
an approximately 80% greater risk of suffering serious injury or harm from abuse or neglect;
an approximately 90% greater risk of receiving moderate injury or harm as a result of child maltreatment; and
a 120% (or more than two times) greater risk of being endangered by some type of child abuse or neglect.
Among children in single-parent households, those living with only their fathers were approximately one and two-thirds times more likely to be physically abused than those living with only their mothers.
In addition, because women make up the vast majority of caretakers, they tend to be held responsible for neglect, which is defined as a form of abuse by HHS, even if the father resides in the home. Note that HHS defines neglect loosely; it can mean failing to get the kids to the doctor "on time"--and that in a country without health insurance. Not to excuse neglect, but very often, it's another name for being poor. When actualy physical abuse is separated out, MEN ABUSE MORE THAN WOMEN. Same study as above:
Abused children presented a different pattern in connection with the sex of their perpetrators than did the neglected children. Children were more often neglected by female perpetrators (87% by females versus 43% by males). This finding is congruent with the fact that mothers and mothersubstitutes tend to be the primary caretakers and are the primary persons held accountable for any omissions and/or failings in caretaking. In contrast, children were more often abused by males (67% were abused by males versus 40% by females). The prevalence of male perpetrators was strongest in the category of sexual abuse, where 89% of the children were abused by a male compared to only 12% by a female.
Also note that multiple studies have shown (cites available upon request) that men, MOSTLY FATHERS, are responsible for 70-90% of the cases of shaken baby syndrome, one of the leading causes of infant mortality. These are mostly teen dads, or dads in their twenties. Often low-income. So these guys are even worse than their girlfriends of the same demographic group when it comes to taking care of kids. Maybe she was "guilty" of not having enough food in the home or not having the house clean enough. But at least she didn't shake the kid till he was brain-damaged or dead. In fact, mothers were the LEAST LIKELY perpetrators of shaken baby syndrome.
90 - Robert Brown
RE: The Countess
Dr. Fiebert's work was not copied and pasted. The comments section on this blog did not hold the complete document. I posted the link to his work.
Dr. Fiebert's work is not the only one that shows a high incidence of abusive women.
No one is denying that men are abusive. Those who are truly interested in domestic violence only desire to show the true scope of this problem.
Of course gender-feminists only want to see one side of the issue, but slowly the truth is being brought to life.
But of course Dr. Fiebert has an agenda but gender-feminists do not.
Countess, just because you don't personally know of any men or boys abused by their wives/mothers does not mean it does not exist. Men/boys rarely report the abuse they receive by women/mothers.
Countess, could you give me a rough estimate of how many men/boys have been abused by women? What sort ofbatterers programs are available for women who abuse their spouses/children? Are these programs helping abusive women deal with their anger/abusive behaviour? What sort of shelters are available to men/boys abused by women/mothers?
91 - Robert Brown
Countess, do you call everyone who disagrees with you a troll and a spammer? At least you acknowledge the fact that women are responsible for some domestic violence and abuse of children. Most gender-feminists refuse to acknowledge women's violence.
92 - Robert Brown
LESBIAN BATTERING
The patriarchy can not be blamed
SAME-SEX BATTERING
Domestic violence occurs within same-sex relationships with the same statistical frequency as in heterosexual relationships.
[Editor's note: Just provide an excerpt and a link to the source, please.]
93 - silverside
What sort of shelters are available for men abused by women?
Shelters are used to house persons made homeless by domestic violence. Virtually every study on the causes of homelessness ranks dv as a major cause of homelessness for women. For men, it has NEVER ONCE even registered on the radar. Not one study. Men are typically homeless for causes related to mental illness, often coupled with alcohol and/or drug abuse.
In fact, looking at homelessness overall, men make up a significant number of homeless persons, especially the CHRONIC homelessness--persons with more than a year of homelessness or multiple episodes.
If you have a concern about homeless men, then address the needs of these guys, although admittedly, they are a difficult population to work with. But why work with a difficult population, when you can fuss about a made-up, so minimal they they don't even register in the statistics population? Men are not homeless because their wives beat them, though sometimes they have a history of abuse towards others, which is why no friends or family will take them in.
94 - Robert Brown
MALE VICTIMS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
The vast majority of recorded incidents of domestic violence are of men on women. Society, although aware of the male victim, treats him as a joke. In realty he is a man in fear, a man in isolation, a man stigmatized as weak. Why? Because he does not conform to the stereotypical male image.
In law, a male victim faces two obstacles; firstly to prove he is a victim, and secondly, to ensure that his children are protected and do not become the new victims. Men very often remain in an abusive relationship for the sake and protection of their children.
Most men react by staying silent. Often this silence is encouraged by factors such as fear of ridicule and the realization that it is unlikely his partner will be evicted. Even when a man has proved he is the victim it seems his only course of action is to leave the home. He is then separated from his children and often experiences difficulty in obtaining realistic and regular contact with them. He is in fact treated as the perpetrator rather than the victim.
95 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Robert, you spammed the same men's/fathers' rights nonsense on my blog as you have here. I banned you and removed some of your spam from my comments. I won't allow my blog to be used for anyone's personal soapbox. If you want to post endless documents you find on men's and fathers' rights web sites, start your own blog.
Spamming like that is akin to shouting. You can't drown out the fact that this documentary is airing and is getting the attention of legislators and courts. "Breaking The Silence: Children's Stories" finally gives abused mothers and abused children a voice - one that has for far too long been drowned out by fathers rights activists who have more time and more resources on their hands than they do.
I have already more than sufficiently shown your copy/pastes for the misrepresentations that they are, as has Silverside. I don't feel a need to continue. Nothing you have copy/pasted here negates from the documentary or its main points. It's clear that men's and fathers' rights activists feel threatened by that documentary. Otherwise, they wouldn't attack it and spam unrelated nonsense the way you have.
96 - Robert Brown
So Silverside, there are zero male victims of domestic violence. Tell that to those vicitimized by women.
Don't be so sure that male victims don't register. Of course they don't register on official gender-feminist lists. That might entail facing the fact that both men and women are victims.
Nice that you are concerned about homeless men though.
97 - Robert Brown
Of course Countess, you call the facts 'nonsense'.
I did not comment one way or the other on the PBS show. But we are all well aware that there is/can be media bias. I do not feel threatened by one television show.
I could show you many, many studies that counter the gender-feminists inspired stats. They are out there for anyone who truly wants the facts on domestic violence. Besides, numbers are not important, people are, male and female.
Really, men/fathers have more money and resources than mothers/women. Don't you have NOW? What government funded agencies exist for men and boys?
I didn't realize I was banned (lol) from your blog. I noticed you removed articles that you didn't like, which is your right but I stand by what was written, ie. the stats on lesbian violence.
I do have my own blog. Perhaps you will take a minute and have a look at it. You might even learn something new.
98 - Robert Brown
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE MYTHS ARE VIOLENT
The gap between public perception about domestic violence (DV) and its reality is astonishing. DV was recruited as a weapon in gender wars, but those who live in glass houses should not throw stones.
In 1984, Diana Russell claimed that 54% of women were the victims of sexual abuse. In 2000, an advocacy group claimed that one in three women around the world have been physically assaulted by their partner. The horrifying statistics keep coming, and varying, but all insist that men are an inherently serious problem.
We rarely hear of the hundreds of serious, academic studies on intimate violence that have been done over the last 35 years. They do not serve those using violence for their own abuse of others. The most authoritative studies are the three Nation Incidence Surveys commissioned by the Department of Heath. While the rate of mild violence, such as slapping or throwing a magazine, are about the same per year for each gender (around 20%), women commit over twice the severe partner assaults as men: punching, kicking, and threat or use of a weapon: 4.6% of women and 1.9% of men.
[Statistics are cited from the DHHS National Incidence Report on Child Maltreatment, and DOJ 1994 report, �Murder in the Family�]
99 - Robert Brown
Countess wrote: Otherwise, they wouldn't attack it and spam unrelated nonsense the way you have.
Isn't there a saying that goes something like the 'kettle calling the pot black?
Unrelated nonsense? LOL
100 - Robert Brown
This excellent article is in pdf form. See link below.
DISABUSING THE DEFINITION OF DOMESTIC ABUSE: HOW WOMEN BATTER MEN AND THE ROLE OF THE FEMINIST STATE
Over the last twenty-five years, leading sociologists have repeatedly found that men and women commit violence at similar rates. The assertion that "the phenomenon of husband battering" is as prevalent as wife abuse is confirmed by nationally representative studies, such as the Family Violence Surveys, as well as by numerous other sources. However, despite the wealth and diversity of the sociological research and the consistency of the findings, female violence is not recognized within the extensive legal literature on domestic violence. Instead, the literature consistently suggests that only men commit domestic violence. Either explicitly, or more often implicitly, through the failure to address the subject in any objective manner, female violence is denied , defended and minimized.
Written by Linda Kelly, Professor of Law, Indiana University of Law
(Florida State University Law Review, Volume 30)
Complete report found at: link
101 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Robert certainly feels threatened by anyone that points out the truth that the vast majority of domestic violence is committed by men against women. I have never said that men aren't abused. They are, but their abuse is not as common as male violence against women. That's not bad or good. It doesn't negate from men who are abused. That's just a fact.
Still, men's rights advocates don't like it. That's why he's posting stuff he has found on men's and father's rights mailing lists, the sole purpose of which is to undermine violence against women. I recognize one copy/paste from MenWeb. Another one is from was originally from Menstuff.
By the way, Robert, those stats aren't cited directly from the report "Murder In The Family". They have been taken out of context by the men's rights regurg you have copy/pasted here. You're wasting your time spamming this crap all over this blog post. Find another hobby.
102 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Robert, the Kelly study (which was published in a law review and not a medical journal) relies on research that used the Conflict Tactic Scales, which I have already pointed out have been cited for having serious methodological problems. The CTS tabulates individual physical "hits" without taking them in the context of the abusive incident or the abusive relationship. Domestic violence is about much more than physical violence. It includes emotional, legal, mental, economic, and verbal abuse. It is a cycle of abuse that cannot be reduced to isolated "hits". Dekeseredy has already discussed all of this in the article I had linked to.
Here's more:
Many social scientists consider CTS data "probably the best available when it comes to estimating the incidence and prevalence of woman abuse in the population at large" (Smith, 1987, p. 177). Yet, quite a large number of researchers have criticized the CTS for the following reasons:
* The CTS rank orders behaviors in a linear fashion, from least serious to most serious. In doing so, it incorrectly assumes that psychological abuse and the first three violence items (e.g., slaps) are automatically less injurious than the items in the severe violence index. Many strongly object to creating what Liz Kelly (1987) calls a "hierarchy of abuse based on seriousness" because emotional abuse is often experienced as more harmful than physical violence (Chang, 1996; Kirkwood, 1993), and a slap can often draw blood or break teeth.
* The CTS works from an ideological base that presumes that violence is family-based, rather seeing the issue as one of male violence directed toward women.
* The CTS only asks about several specific types of abuse, but does not ask about many others. Many researchers fear that respondents will not report abuse that is not asked about, such as scratches, burns, and sexual assault.
* The methodology of the CTS is simply to count the raw number of violent acts committed. What it cannot tell us is why people use violence. Thus, CTS data almost always report men and women as equally violent, and thereby miss the fact they use violence for different reasons. Women use violence for a variety of reasons, but a common one is to defend themselves. Men typically use violence to control their female partners (DeKeseredy, Saunders, Schwartz, & Alvi, 1997; Ellis & Stuckless, 1996).
* The CTS only situates violence and verbal aggression/psychological abuse in the context of settling conflicts or disputes (note again the preamble above). In doing this, it ignores a large number of control-instigated assaults that do not have their root in conflicts or disputes. Even worse, it may miss attacks that "come out of the blue" with no external reason or dispute to mediate. These attacks, whether physical or verbal violence, may be as or more highly injurious as those that stem from conflicts or disputes. The CTS, although it may accurately count numbers of blows struck, overlooks the broader social psychological and social forces (e.g., patriarchy) that motivate men to abuse their female partners.
-----
As suggested above, the CTS does not provide adequate answers to this question. Much worse is that many people think that the answers the CTS provides do in fact deal with this question. The data that arise from the use of the CTS are commonly, and problematically, used to show that violence in relationships is "sexually symmetrical" (Dobash, Dobash, Wilson, & Daly, 1992). In other words, by simply counting the number of blows struck, the data appear to show that women are just as, if not more, violent than men. Unfortunately, this crude methodology can hide as much or more than it can illuminate (Schwartz & DeKeseredy, 1993).
These problems can be avoided by including questions about motives, meanings, and contexts in different sections of the CTS or CTS2. For example, DeKeseredy and Kelly (1993) placed the following three questions after both the first three and the last six violence items in the CTS, as part of a national study to measure the prevalence of violence in Canadian university and college dating:
On (the following) items, what percentage of these times overall do you estimate that in doing these actions you were primarily motivated by acting in self-defense, that is protecting yourself from immediate physical harm?
On (the following) items, what percentage of these times overall do you estimate that in doing these actions you were trying to fight back in a situation where you were not the first to use these or similar tactics?
On (the following) items, what percentage of these times overall do you estimate that you used these actions on your dating partners before they actually attacked you or threatened to attack you?
In analyzing the data generated by these questions, DeKeseredy et al. (1997) did not find support for the sexual symmetry thesis. Rather, a substantial number of women reported that their violence was in self-defense or "fighting back." These findings are consistent with Saunders’ (1986) study of battered women. Thus far, the sexual symmetry thesis has only been supported by those using crude measures, such as the CTS with no further questioning.
The most important point of this paper is that the bulk of the research in this field has simply counted blows (who hit whom, and how often). The CTS2 speaks to one context issue (but only one) by asking about injury. A light slap may be different than one that jars loose several teeth. A push out of the way is different than a push down a flight of stairs. However, the survey still does not easily differentiate between a victim fighting back for her life, a survivor retaliating, and an instigator of violence without cause. All are considered violent. Even the more recent strategy of asking who struck the first blow (purportedly to tell who is the aggressor and who is fighting in self-defense) can be hard to place in context. When a woman has been beaten 30 times in the past and knows from her husband’s behavior that a beating is coming within minutes, and further knows that if she strikes first she will end up being hurt less, does that mean that the violence is the woman’s fault?
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Men and women are not equally abusive Robert, and your repeated postings of stuff you find on men's and fathers' rights web sites won't change that. I suggest you stop now and watch a nice, pleasant movie.
103 - Robert Brown
No Countess, I do not feel threatened, the truth is on my side. I have never undermined violence against women. I know it is a serious situation but your ideology prohibits you from understanding the other side of the issue so you accuse me of cutting and pasting and taking things out of context. That is totally untrue. I don't know where you have come up with this cutting and pasting. These are legitimate articles albeit ones that you don't like. I have been around gender-feminists long enough to know that anything they dislike they ridicule or dismiss as just not possibly true.
Why can't you at least be rational and admit that professionals other than gender-feminists produce statistics. Your desire to vilify men is transparent. Are you saying that Dr. Linda Kelly's research is invalid?
I don't think I am wasting my time. It obviously hit a nerve with you. Sometimes, Countess, the truth hurts.
I have many hobbies, I don't need you to tell me to find another one. I will not tell you to find another hobby. Keep writing. I know I will
104 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Robert, studies that find parity between men and women regarding domestic violence rely exclusively on the Conflict Tactic Scales. I have already demonstrated how problematic the CTS is. The majority of of domestic violence is committed by men against women. Nothing you post here is going to change that.
You really need to calm down. Try listening to some Enya, or something.
105 - Robert Brown
I know, Countess, you aren't gonna like these stats either
HUSBANDS AND WIVES ASSAULTING EACH OTHER AT NEARLY SAME RATE
What domestic violence presenters don’t tell you
How many know that the same research which is used to say that a woman is severely assaulted by her husband/boyfriend every 15 second in this country, also indicated that a man is severely assaulted by his wife/girlfriend every 14.6 seconds.
(Straus, M. A., 1977)
How many know that although most Archival research (data which comes from police arrest reports, hospital records, judicial reports, and domestic violence shelters usually set up to help female victims) indicates only a small percentage of male victims of domestic violence, that the vast majority of scientific Survey research continues to indicate that husbands and wives are assaulting each other at nearly the same rate, a range from 35 to 50 percent male victims.
(Straus, M. A., 1977; Steinmetz, 1978; Brutz & Ingoldby 1981; Makepeace 1981; Makepeace 1983; Elliot, D. S. et al., 1985; Straus, M. A., & Gelles, R., 1986; Meredith et al. 1986; Szinovacz, 1987; Barling et al., 1987; Mason & Blankenship, 1987; O’Leary & Arias, 1988; Malcolm, G., 1994; Dunn, K., 1994; Coochey, J., 1995; Carrado et al., 1996)
How many know that when Feminist groups and domestic violence workers are exposed to these facts they will immediately minimize the importance of these studies by raising the argument that even if women do assault their partner it is usually for reason of self-defense, yet they produce no scientific research to support this claim other than some case studies or anecdotal information. Although limited, scientific research data suggests that only 10-20% of women assault their male partners for reasons of self-defense. Domestic violence shelters are likely to see these women and are less likely to see the 80-90% of women who assault their husbands/boyfriends for reasons other than self-defense. Interestingly, about 30% of the men said they assaulted their partner in self-defense.
(Carrado, et al., 1996; Sommer, 1992)
How many know that survey research suggest that women who are assaulted are 9 times more likely to report to police and 5 times more likely to tell a friend/relative than men who are assaulted by their wives. (Stets, J. & Straus, M. A., 1990) In general only about 8-10% of women who are assaulted and 1-2% of men who are assaulted report the assault to an agency/authority. (Fontes, 1998) This is likely why archival data indicates more female victims.
How many know that most assaults between partners are mutual 48.6%, men only 25.5%, and women only 25.9%. Or that women are more likely to stick the first blow against their intimate partner, as reported by women themselves. (Straus, 1997) One study showed that 83% of the couples studies engaged in "bi-directional or mutual physical aggression."
(Jennifer Langhinrich-Rohling et al., 1996).
How many know that 60% of women who are arrested for domestic violence against their husbands have previous criminal records.
(Jurik, N. C., 1989; Jurik, N. C., & Gregware, P., 1989)
How many know that although women are seven times more likely to report they needed to see a doctor as a result of being assaulted by their husband (Gelles, 1996), one does not know if they are seven times more likely to actually be injured by their husbands than husbands are by their wives. Only 3% of the women reported they needed to see a doctor and only 0.4% of the men reported they need to see a doctor as a result of being assaulted. (Straus, M. A., 1997) Women are nearly twice as like to use an object when she assaults a male partner which can equalize the level of injury he receives.
(Straus & Gelles, 1986)
106 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Waste your evening copy/pasting men's and fathers' rights regurg to your heart's content, Robert. You obviously feel so threatened by a feminist who posts the truth about those issues that you feel it necessary to drown out any valid information on those subjects with men's rights nonsense. Nothing you've posted is anything I have not seen before. You are like most men's/fathers' rights activists in the kind of behavior you engage in. I have better things to do than to keep responding to you. I've sufficiently gutted what you've posted so far. I'm going to enjoy "CSI" and "Without A Trace" that I taped last night, and it's dinner time.
107 - Robert Brown
Thanks for the music suggestion, actually I prefer Clannad over Enya, although I think the lead singer of Clannad is Enya's sister. To each his/her own, I guess. Any movie suggestions for this evening?
108 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Ohhh, Robert, Clannad. I like that group. I have one of Maire Brennan's solo CDs. My husband prefers Enya, but we listen to both.
A good, under-rated movie that's perfect for Halloween is "The Devil's Backbone". It's about children living in an orphanage during the Spanish civil war. There is a ghost in the orphanage. My description doesn't do the movie justice. This movie deserves more attention than it gets. You can find it at Blockbuster, in the foreign film section. It's in Spanish with English subtitles.
Now, onto "CSI" and "Without A Trace" and dinner. Enjoy your movie, if you watch it.
109 - Robert Brown
Countess, thanks for the movie suggestion, sounds like a good one.
I don't think you have gutted anything. The posts are not meant for you. Don't waste your time responding to them.
My only hope is that maybe one person that reads this will do their own investigation and come to their own conclusions after reading both sides of the issue. There are two sides to this issue.
I would, though, like to know what your idea of cutting and pasting is. I always thought that it entailed taking paragraphs from different articles and putting them together. I have not done that. For anyone interested, I will gladly send the URL.
Since you do admit that men and boys are victims of domestic violence do you support shelters for these men and boys being made available? Do you agree that these violent women should, like their male counterparts, be made to seek treatment? Should these violent women loose custody of their children if they are the sole abusers? Presently, the system denies that women are abusers and therefore are not obligated to receive treatment for the violence they inflict. How can the problem of family violence ever be solved if women are not accountable for their criminal behaviour? I will not even touch the rash of women teachers who have recently been sexually assaulting young boys.
Again, thanks for the movie suggestion!
110 - Arizonadad
In my case I was not permitted an evidenturary hearing or permitted to prove anything. My ex wife is trained in the deadly martial art form of tae kwon do and is ex military. I am a viet nam vet. she admitted under oath that during our 9.5 year marriage I never laid a hand or her or the children. she had threatened to kill me during one of her psychotic episodes.
111 - Eric Olsen
Robert, please stop copying and pasting whole news stories from other sources - thanks
112 - bhw
I would, though, like to know what your idea of cutting and pasting is. I always thought that it entailed taking paragraphs from different articles and putting them together. I have not done that. For anyone interested, I will gladly send the URL.
Robert, I'm an editor here at Blogcritics. What you're doing IS copying/pasting because you're ... um, copying, verbatim, content from another source and pasting in as a stand-alone comment here at Blogcritics.
Please make your own point, and feel free to back it up with other sources if you'd like. But please do stop dumping large volumes of content from other sources without making any commentary of your own.
Oh, and each time you do quote a from another source, make it a short exceprt and include the URL. Do this every time. Nobody should have to ask for a link.
113 - SaraJaneSteel
I think using these gender-based statistics is really besides the point. It's no earth-shaking revelation that a child can be abused by the father AND/OR the mother. These stats of "the likelihood of child abuse is more prevalent when the child is left with the father" or vice versa reduces this to a petty battle of the sexes. There's seems to be such a blame-fest going on no one appears to be paying attention to the very reason this topic is up: the CHILDREN.
IMHO: in this case (child abuse), I believe that either parent (in some cases, BOTH parents) are ill-prepared, under-educated, under-funded and in all other ways UNFIT to even BEAR children, to say nothing of RAISING them. I see what's going on in front of me, and it gets worse with each generation: For the most part, parents don't know WHHHAAT THE FFFFUCKKK they're doing!!!!
Oh, but the parents raise up in defense "I know what's best for my child"...."I WANT the best for my child"...But how do they REALLY know what's best?? Where did they get thier qualifications? People seem to take for granted the (erroneous) belief that having a functional pair of reproductive organs equates parental qualification. That, in that instant they magically become aware of what to do, what to provide to give the best possible upbringing for thier child.....But history has shown this is simply not true. The innate sense animals have when they bear young is something that is not fit for comparison...And WANTING the best for your child is not only not enough, it just may be something that is too tough to actually deliver (or even figure out) and the "parents" just can't cut it...(and I can't help but be reminded of the old saying, the road to hell is paved with good intentions).
I see it as so tragic that these parents' skill, mettle and sense of responsibility (or lack thereof) is only questioned AFTER the child is born and not before...but by then it's far too late. And the only planning these types of parents make is stocking up on diapers and milk formula, the preparation, setting aside room for a crib.....IF THAT!! The rest is seemed to be made up as they go along. Can you see what's sorely lacking? The way I see it, a parent isn't really raising a child, he/she is raising AN ADULT...And if this endeavor isn't treated as such, there will be repercussions that will more than likely carry on when YOUR child becomes a parent. Your deficiences will become THIERS. I have a hunch that if these parents would look in through the right end of this scope....there would be a shift in thier consciousness (however small) and this negative spiral would begin to slow...if only a little bit.
This problem has progressed so far for so long, I can't think of any solution that wouldn't be considered austere.
Two words: parenting license.
You require a license for driving a car, operating a gun, etc...yet you have 1,000,000,000x more potential in creating scarring, life-altering damage when you have an impressionable mind of a young child in your very hands and you just happen to have NO IDEA what the f you're doing. That PBS documentary illustrates this very point quite well. If after the series of screenings, interviews and examinations for the parenting license you do not pass, your right to reproduce would be revoked.
*sigh* I know, I know... "*gasp* How dare you! That's the kind of thinking that's fit for the Chinese government!! How very un-American of you to even suggest such a thing!!"
But I can't help but see how much...not only pain, anguish and trauma this would spare, but the kind of pain, anguish and trauma that perpetuates itself like a cycle from one generation to the next as it often does with child abuse and childraising by unfit parents.
America is supposed to be 'the land of freedoms' but that definition shouldn't include 'freedom to abuse your rights', particularly one's reproductive rights. But idea of American freedom by it's very foundation was built upon "good intentions" and look at things now.The things our forefathers wished for us to revel in and pass on has slowly degraded over the years...American law is so ridden in loopholes. Our rights compromised, twisted and contorted to the will of whichever politician is in power solely to further thier agenda. America has become a perverted shadow of it's former self. Our forefathers didn't seem to anticipate the greedy and malignant side of human nature...Oops, that sounds like another topic for another time.....
114 - Arizonadad
Is that it is the corrupt incompetent courts that are fueling the fires of abuse. the corruption is so frustraghting is truely drive some over the edge. Sciety itself is creating so much presure on the family unit that no one 40 years ago had to deal with. If you ask people to get back to basics, some have no understanding of what that is. How much less expensive is it for a family to own one car, how much less expensice is it for the entore family to set down at the dinner table together. the list can go on and on it boils down to a true basic family system with relatives close by and a one income family not trying to keep up with the joneses Kids being spoiled with every electronic toy on the market. spending quality family time together. Instead we see the malls full of unsupervized teens or out way after dark very little time where the family really interrelates with each other. something has to change and i believe that is the fact that divorce is so easy to get.
Our correctional facilities work so well that instead of closing them down they are continualy building more. Our courts are so corrupt no one can expect justice if they can not afford to make some attorney rich. I think I speak for many people when I say it is time to take our country back from the power brokers, the major corporations and the out of control government. what happened to all of the good paying middle class jobs. The primary best paying job right now is the divorce mother working full time to support herself and three kids on child support and working so many hours she can not take the time to supervise her own children. Either we start controling divorce or it will continue to spiral to destruction. Our society will not tollerate much more.
115 - Robert Brown
I apoligize for the cutting and pasting. I am relatively new to blogging and am just learning the etiquette. Thanks for taking the time to explain.
116 - Silenced mother
"Breaking the Silence: Children's Stories" uncovered the tip of an iceberg that has been hidden from the public's view for the last 20 years. I write this letter because I'm concerned that a few critics of the documentary are purposely or inadvertently shifting attention away from the rest of the iceberg.
One critic of the documentary, who started a group called "Fathers and Families", recently organized a letter writing campaign to persuade others to write letters to criticize PBS for airing the documentary.
I appreciate the documentary and I think the issues it covered were clearly defined. Family courts are the only forums available for handling custody and visitation cases. Many family courts are not able to appropriately handle custody and visitation cases involving abuse because:
- There is a lack of adequate training and a lack of minimal standards for those responsible for handling domestic violence and sexual abuse cases in family courts and related offices;
- Overwork, a lack of attention to details and no oversight in abuse cases contribute to uncorrected errors that eventually skew histories of abuse cases;
- There are a lack of clearly defined effective roles for children's attorneys in abuse cases; and,
- The "parental alienation" scam that's frequently used as "a legal tactic" for abusers takes full advantage of the environment created by the factors mentioned above.
The individual organizing the letter writing campaign to criticize PBS wants others to share his opinion that the documentary is against fathers in general. He attempts to gather support for his cause by appealing to the "us against them" mentality and replaces the most important question of: "How we can better protect abused children in family courts?" with his own question of: "Who is more abusive?".
He states that "statistics show" that mothers are more abusive than fathers. Unfortunately, he distracts attention away from the main message of the documentary by using child abuse statistics out of context. While "neglect" cases comprise most of the reported child abuse cases and mothers are held responsible in most "neglect" cases, he has conveniently ignored the explanations and definitions provided with those statistics that give meaning to the numbers. For example, according to information provided with the statistics from the Department of Health and Human Services, mothers are held responsible for most "neglect" cases - which include accidental injuries and "failure to protect" cases - because mothers are typically the primary caregivers of their children.
Perhaps the most important statistic the critic of the documentary ignores is from Childhelp USA. That is: "The actual incidence of abuse and neglect is estimated to be three times greater than the number reported to authorities." Based on what we know about domestic violence, childhood sexual abuse and the way our family courts handle abuse cases, one could conclude that many - or most - unreported abuse cases involve battered mothers and abused children who are afraid to report abuse.
To help us to better understand the statistics about child abuse in relation to the national scandal addressed in the documentary, the following questions about the statistics should be considered:
Why aren't the majority of child abuse cases reported? Who are the abusers and who are the victims in the unreported cases? The documentary shows a small representation of thousands of mothers who, trying to protect their children from abuse, are said to have variations of "PAS" and are accused of "neglect" and "emotional abuse" for trying to protect their children from further abuse. How many reported "neglect" cases are actually cases involving protective mothers? How many mothers are charged with "neglect" for being unable to protect their children from abuse?
Thanks to the airing of the documentary and the dialogue that will follow, the public will not continue to be swayed by the smoke and mirrors thrown up by those who use statistics out of context or by those who use the "PAS" scam in their own cases or by those who use the "PAS" scam as a cottage industry to make a living in the family court system. The airing of the documentary has empowered many victims of the "PAS" scandal with the hope that congressional investigations and family court reforms will take place as a result of the airing of the documentary.
I cannot sign my name at the end of this letter. Like the mothers in the documentary, I am a protective mother who has been effectively silenced. After five years living this nightmare, I still cannot believe this is happening in this country in this day and age. I feel like I am living in a holocaust. Please investigate this national crisis and do everything you can to help. Please encourage others to do so as well.
Thank you for reading this letter.
117 - Arizonadad
So you belong to which female groups that are making every effort to stop the progress mens groups are trying to make. there are men in the very same place you are with their history of the silver bullet technique being used to destory their relationship with their children and ruining their careers and destroying their lives for nothing more that being divorced from the extremely vendictive women they were married to. do not cry on my shoulder, I have had three children abducted by their mothers and everytime have proven they lied, I actually got custody changed twice for good cause and still never got my children back. the issue is not gender it is the corrupt courts. I agree with you the statistics they used were misrepresented, to the detriment of the mens favor. My most recent ex had to be sued by her own parents to recover child support arrears for the two children she gave away. I totally supported all of her children for nearly 10 years, she kept the one she could force me to continue to support and gave the other two away. She uses my child support to pay what she owes for her child support. My child does without.
118 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Thanks for sharing your story, Silenced Mom. That was a very brave thing to do, considering some of the kinds of comments that have been posted here by fathers' rights activists. I hope that the documentary will educate legislators and legal personnel regarding cases such as your own. Sadly, there aren't any women's groups that focus on helping protective moms and other moms caught up in ugly custody battles. There are individuals helping out, but there aren't nearly enough of them. Once again, than you for commenting here.
119 - Loving Grandmother
Silenced Mother,
I would have to disagree with you in regard to Parent Alienation Syndrome. IT IS NOT A SCAM. I have contact with many fathers, all of whom are victims of PAS, along with their children. The sad part is, they ALL have the same manipulation, only at varying degrees, being played on them.
I have been to several single Mothers websites and I can tell you, after 3 years into this, they share their next plan of attack AGAISNT THE FATHERS, with other mothers. And then they share the laughs.
There are many, many forms of PAS. THE CHILDREN SUFFER, THEY ARE THE VICTIMS.
I do agree, there is an iceberg, but your in the wrong ocean. Stepmoms, sisters, aunts and grandmothers are speaking up for the fathers and what is going on. They see first hand the devastation and distruction of children.
The truth will be revealed.
NO one on this earth can tell me, the sick, twisted crap my grandchild is fed, IS NOT PAS.
I could also share with you court transcripts of PAS being proven in courts. It would take paint off the wall of what some people won't do.
120 - Arizonadad
Was it the Galuzo v Galuzo case the US Supreme court ruled on that ruled PAS is a reason to consider a change of custody, because 22 states have already recognized it as a valid complaint and because it passed the FREY test? And isn't it a fact that the american soiciety of psychology will not be able to add it to their list until 2010 because that is when their next changes to the list are to take place? And if the US Supreme court ruled it is a valid complaint does that make it case law for all states?
121 - Arizonadad
Well she did it again and may get away with it again. I just found out friday that my child was being relocated to georgia from new mexico. No notice of entent to relocate has been filed. My ex wife has not made any contact with me for several months. she uses our child to transmit any information to me putting our child in the middle. Her past practice has been to move just before filing for divorce, so I am assuming that husband number five will be history very soon.
So far I have contacted my local sheriff for assistance and he refused to take a report. I have contacted my state attorney General, the Sheriff in the last location, the local FBI office, my district state senator, My US senator and a local TV station. So far nobody seems the least bit interested in persuing a charge of parental interference or child abduction. One of the many reasons the custody was reversed in the first place was the number of moves in such a short period of time. My ex wife assured the new mexico judge that she had purchaseda new home and was going to continue to live in that state perminently. The judge is requored by every law on the books to enforce my change of custody order and violated some 18 state and federal laws when she refused to enforce that order. Now my ex wife is on the run again. she has terminiated all telephone contact that was ordered by the court and computer contact as well. changed our childs school in the middle of a semester. I'm sure she had to get rid of all of my childs pets, again. My daughter was on the honor roll last year, this year she seems disinterested. Her mother has destroyed the college account I set up for her. she says its ok because she is not smart enough to go to college anyway. I hope some one helps soon, one of the responsible law enforcement agencies because my ex wife is destroying our daughter. And until someone else does something I am powerless to stop her. Three states, four courts and seven judges have criminally interfered with my legal access and rights to my child. when is this going to stop?
122 - Loving Grandmother
Arizonadad,
And PBS said PAS is a legal tactic. Ya, right. This is PAS.
I would take your story to the media or find some good fathers activitists groups.
So much for your rights.
123 - MOM
I do not believe in PAS. I don't think there is a systematic effort by custodial parents to alienate their children from the other parent. I think its just parents that haven't got their issues with each other under control and are using their children to vent their frustrations. The children easily pick up on this and as they are usually living with the one parent most of the time they don't want to do anything to trigger or upset the parent they are living with most of the time so they try not to show that they care for the other parent when deep inside I believe they really do.
124 - kevin smith
Well I know PAS exists personally and as far as I know there is no debate as to wether it exists or not, just whether it should be classified as a disease or mental illness.
If 5-10% of cases involve custody disputes why cant we just do more thorough investigation,short term and long term???I would think either a TRULY abusive person,or a person exhibiting PAS,would be easily discovered by a trained expert.Especially in cases where the parties dont have the money for psychologists and experts etc.
A neutral party who is TRAINED in psychology and not a party to either side.
just my opinion
kevin
125 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Kevin Smith: "Well I know PAS exists personally and as far as I know there is no debate as to wether [sic] it exists or not, just whether it should be classified as a disease or mental illness."
True. There is no debate as to whether it exists or not. It doesn't exist. It is not included in the DSM-IV. The American Psychological Association has already written a statement that shows it does not support "alienation".
APA Presidential Task Force On Violence And The Family
[excerpt - bold my emphasis]
Family courts frequently minimize the harmful impact of children's witnessing violence between their parents and sometimes are reluctant to believe mothers. If the court ignores the history of violence as the context for the mother's behavior in a custody evaluation, she may appear hostile, uncooperative, or mentally unstable. For example, she may refuse to disclose her address, or may resist unsupervised visitation, especially if she thinks her child is in danger. Psychological evaluators who minimize the importance of violence against the mother, or pathologize her responses to it, may accuse her of alienating the children from the father and may recommend giving the father custody in spite of his history of violence.
Some professionals assume that accusations of physical or sexual abuse of children that arise during divorce or custody disputes are likely to be false, but the empirical research to date shows no such increase in false reporting at that time. In many instances, children are frightened about being alone with a father they have seen use violence towards their mother or a father who has abused them. Sometimes children make it clear to the court that they wish to remain with the mother because they are afraid of the father, but their wishes are ignored.