Renamed "Crossfire" will be in showrooms next week.
Written by Joe Wilson
AUBURN HILLS, Michigan (PoopyCaca.com) – DaimlerChrysler announced that it is changing the name of its roadster, "Crossfire," in order to further distance the sports car from the CNN yell-fest that is also named "Crossfire," but which was cancelled weeks ago, yet continues to air live five days a week.
TV Critic Jon Stewart bitch slapping CNN.
"Crossfire," the self proclaimed "debate" show (which is to debate as Anna Nicole Smith is to enunciation) was described by Comedy Central’s Jon Stewart as "hurting America" while a guest on the show. This prompted CNN President Jonathan Klein to cancel the show and point perpetually bow-tied man/boy Tucker Carlson towards the exit.
Carlson is currently shooting sitcom/reality pilot "That’s Tucker!" for cable news channel CNMSBNC.
DaimlerChrysler spokesperson Paul Milbank made the announcement at a press conference at the corporate headquarters in Auburn Hills, Michigan. "Sales of the ‘Crossfire’ were down," Milbank said, "and our market research showed that when people looked at the car and the name 'Crossfire,' all they would see is Robert Novak’s comb over."
The car will now be known as the "Good Morning America," a solid bet by DaimlerChrysler on the winner of the morning show ratings war.
Bring The Pain.
The "dead show walkin'" continues to be hooked up to the feeding tube of whiny Paul Begala, assholebusdman Robert Novak, decaf poster boy James Carville, Bay (is that Pat in drag?) Buchanan and a flurry of Central Political-Talking-Head Casting refugees who battle with a gaggle of politicians and other blabbermouths from the left and the right who like to yell at each other.
Regarding why "Crossfire" has been cancelled yet remains on the air, Jonathan Klein explained, "We were all far too mesmerized by the personality, beauty and intelligence of Nancy Grace to notice that we left ‘Crossfire’ on the air. I’ll get to it after the Michael Jackson trial is over."
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