Where better to look for words of wisdom than the rear bumper of a moving vehicle?
I may be cynical, but it seems to me that if your political philosophy can be summed up in a bumper sticker it might just be a little superficial. Here are some of my favorite examples:…
Article comments
26 - Steve S
Please don't be disingenuous. That bumper sticker is saying that the people who claim to have 'Family Values' are actually full of hate.
No, it's not Dave. When someone says 'hate' is not a family value, that is NOT saying that all those who have family values, hate. THAT is disingenuous.
For an example, if someone says hate is not a religious ideal, it would be ludicrous to assume that they think all religion is all about hate.
it actually shows that those who are condemning hate are actually practicing unreasoning hatred at the same time.
Nonsense. I doubt anybody else could buy this line of logic. If I say that hate is not a value, that does not mean that I hate anything at all. You are saying that the people who put up the bumper sticker 'hate' those they disagree with. You have no clue as to how they feel. I happen to know a great many people in my community who have that bumper sticker and they don't hate anybody.
27 - David Flanagan
Dave,
Good post. About a year ago, I think, I put up something similar called, Liberals: Architects of The Bumper Sticker Generation, where I said some similar things. No party really has a corner on the market for bumper sticker slogans, but what concerned me the most at that time was that it was very tough to debate someone when the only response I could get from them regarding the need to take Saddam out of power was, "No Blood for Oil!!!!!"
Impedes debate, don't you think? We have to be on guard against this habit, no matter what your political ideology.
Thanks,
David
28 - Anna
My rule is that only music-related stickers go on the bumper and trunk door above the bumper of my car. The rear window lower corners have become small political statement areas.
I think my favorite band sticker on my car is for the folk-pop trio Girlyman, which took on a new meaning thanks to Ah-nold.
I'd list all the stickers I have on my car, but I'm sure I'd miss a few.
29 - The Theory
my car has some crazy cool bumber stickers... mostly music related. The coolest is the cover of Bjork's "Medulla" album.
My newest one says "Girls Rock." I like it's cuz it's true.
30 - Mel
My faves are:
Everything is happening at once and it's all on time.
&
If you don't have a government grant, get one.
31 - Jim Carruthers
Reminds me of a conference I was at in Chicago, and at meeting with people from Michigan and Wisconsin, when the topic turned to cars, admitted I don't have a driver's license. What? don't you people have taxi cabs, busses, streetcars, trains?
Which means if you are staring at bumper stickers and license plates, you just might be in hell and don't know it.
32 - Mike Kole
I'm glad people like Dave put the Badnarik sticker on the car. Whenever I pass someone on the highway (I'm a leadfoot) sporting a libertarian sticker, I give them the thumbs up. They usually seem puzzled about it until they see mine.
I always have one that says "Do the math, vote Libertarian", and I post local LP candidates' stickers when in season.
33 - DrPat
I like the inventive, creative and humorous stickers, the first time I see them.
I giggled for weeks over "Landscape the White House/Remove the Bushes", "Free Tibet/Get Yours Now" and "Save the Spotted Salamander/Shoot an Owl".
An in-law has "Proud Member of PETA/People Eating Tasty Animals". I like that, it's clever.
But take them seriously? They're not philosophical statements; they're more like whims glued to your car.
34 - Dave Nalle
DrPat: But take them seriously? They're not philosophical statements; they're more like whims glued to your car.
Yep, but that's the problem. A lot of peoples level of political insight is dismayingly whimlike and easily summed up in a bumper sticker.
Dave
35 - Eric Berlin
Another fairly good Star Treak sticker on cars, the style of a university sign: Starfleet Academy
A not so cool one: School of Hard Knocks
36 - Eric Berlin
By the way: our cars are anonymous as can be... I'm too bloody neurotic to have it any other way.
37 - DrPat
I trust you do have a license plate, Eric. (I know what you mean, though - you don't glue your whims to the bumper of your car.)
38 - Dave Nalle
I actually know of a person in our local Libertarian Party who doesn't have a license plate because he believes the state doesn't have the Constitutional right to issue them. From what I hear he spends a lot of time in court.
Dave
39 - Eric Olsen
cars as sticker farms are different matters and typically on the pre-owned vehicles of the young - sort of like passenger guitar cases. I don't have a problem with those but be aware you have reduced your resale/trade-in value
40 - Shark
DaveNalle: "...A lot of peoples [sic] level of political insight is dismayingly whimlike and easily summed up in a bumper sticker."
Dave's curb-level of insight and dismayingly [sic] whimlike philosophies:
"Badnarik '04
UN with a slash through it
Single Action Shooting Society Sticker
NRA Sticker"
(Implicit message: "Beware: I'm a marginalized nut with a gun.")
41 - Eric Olsen
I am very leery of sloganeering in general, finding it to be a dangerous combination of consumerist and totalitarian impulses
42 - Dave Nalle
Sharl: (Implicit message: "Beware: I'm a marginalized nut with a gun.")
Many guns.
Dave
43 - Eric Berlin
I am very leery of sloganeering in general, finding it to be a dangerous combination of consumerist and totalitarian impulses
Couldn't agree more, Eric... yet that's what politics has seemed to have devolved to. It's the unrefined black & white, good & bad, my way or the highway attitudes that get things into dangerous territory. This phenomena, and gerrymandering, are largely responsible for the loss of civility and 'political divide' we see today.
44 - Eric Olsen
E, I would agree except both predate the Republic
45 - andy marsh
I have US Navy Retired(3), life is good, CMLF (cape may lewes ferry) CBBT(chesapeake bay bridge tunnel),CM(cape may), VB(virginia Beach) and a flag.
I guess all you get from that is that I travel on I13 alot and I did a little time in the Navy.
46 - BRICKLAYER
A simple rule to live your life by:
stear clear of anyone sporting a sticker of Calvin (the cartoon character, not the religious dude) urinating or praying.
Oh, and anything with a "No Fear" or "Fear This" sticker on it.
47 - Eric Olsen
and anyone with a variation of the "my kid ... " sticker as well
48 - andy marsh
how about the my kid can whip your honor student ones?
49 - Eric Olsen
yes, that is the one I pull out the tire iron for
50 - andy marsh
I used to have 2 on one car I had, one said, mean people suck, the other said nice people swallow. It was suggested that I might want to remove them once my daughters were old enough to understand them.
51 - Nick Jones
I haven't got any bumper stickers on my vehicle, but here are the best ones I've seen:
In Boston once, during my college years: Jesus is Coming, and Boy is He Pissed!
On my way to work, running late and cranky about it, I'm cursing the old biddy driving under the speed limit in front of me. I look at her sticker, I'm Only Driving This Way To Piss You Off, and I burst into laughter, completely dissolving the bad mood I was in.
52 - Mark Saleski
...nice people swallow
funny andy, i was going to mention this....one time not too long ago i drove up behind a car that had that very same sticker on it.
the car was full of very young and very hot girls.
i thought to myself.....
"cripes...i'm old"
53 - RJ
"What's delusional about not being rich enough for a tax break?"
Uh...because everyone paying federal taxes got a tax break under Bush?
54 - RJ
"cars as sticker farms are different matters and typically on the pre-owned vehicles of the young - sort of like passenger guitar cases. I don't have a problem with those but be aware you have reduced your resale/trade-in value"
My car is 11 years old. It's the only car I've ever had.
When I first got it, and it was in good condition, I NEVER put any bumper stickers on it.
Now that it's a complete Piece Of Shit (POS), I just don;t care anymore. So I put stickers all over the rear bumper...
55 - Shop Right
Re: Eric O. / Comment 6 - Funny, I've never heard any expectant mother refer to what she's carrying as a "fetus".
As for political bumper stickers, perhaps VISUALIZE WORLD PEACE takes the cake. Visualizing it, OK, not likely, now what?
56 - Eric Olsen
it's called anthropormorphism and projection: calling a seed a tree doesn't make it so
57 - Denise
I like anything slamming JANE FONDA.
AMERICAN COMMIE BITCH
Or KICK JANE OUT
58 - Breanna
you missed the point of the no one died when clinton lied..
the point is, they tried to impeach him for lying.. yet no one's doing shit about bush and thousands of people have died due to his stupidity (dealing with the levees and dikes in NO) or by following in his daddy's footsteps. IRaq.
when you look at it that way, it makes all sorts of sense right?
no one's calling bush a liar.. just an idiot.
59 - JLR
I like the fruit loop mobile. The bearer of hundreds of stickers. The 19 year old girl with blue hair and multiple metal piercings always driving some tiny (very tiny) econo box in the slow lane. The car is covered with stickers from bands that no recognizes even as a band name, and has so many other crazy fruit loop political and philosophical stickers there is barely any paint showing on the rear of the car.
The utlimate joke is the the loop has lowered the value of her econo box even more and made her box impossible to sell. Bonus points if she has the little male fruit loop sissy friend in the passenger seat when you pass her.
60 - Curt
Bush Lied and people have died!!! Clinton's lie didnt get anyone hurt. Bush has to be the stupidist president ever!! We would be better off with Nixon in office lol. Thats not saying much though. Trust me he knew that the information given wasnt accurate and was told so!!! but before he took office his aggenda was clear..invade Iraq at all cost. He even was qouted as saying..."I care nothing of public opinion I am doing what I think is right for the American People" Who the hell is he to tell me what he thinks is right!!!!??? Dont I pay his Salary as do the Majority of Americans that oppose of this war!!!???? If I was a business owner and I told my people to do something and if they said no!! I am going to do what I think is right ofr you, I would fire their ass right off the bat!!!!! We need this man impeached he is a danger to our lives!!! Clinton on the other hand was doing his job throughout the impeachment process and didnt spend most of his time defending himself like BUSH!!! Bush has caused thousands of lives and so much debt has been been built up, 40% of our debt has been through the obsorbtion from foriegn countries!!!! We are selling our fredom to foriegn countries!!! Thats all we are accompishing by this war!!!! Our souls sold to the highestbidder, that being the same ones that are harboring terror!!!!
61 - Clavos
Eric #9:
Normally, I'd agree with you on that point, but just the other day I saw one that I think both you and bhw #22 would have enjoyed. It was on a late-model BMW 700 series, and said:
"Was His"
62 - Nancy
My only bumper sticker says, "GET OFF THE DAMNED CELL PHONE & PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR DRIVING!"
63 - m. a. clark
I suppose this comment will get deleted right off but it is not intended to be seen by anyone except dave, whoever he is. first off most of your comments/articles should be banned per your own policy, ie. "comments that are some combination of pointlessly vulgar, vile, cruel, without redeeming qualities, and an embarrassment to the site." the bumper sticker article was exceptionally stupid. who in the hell takes bumper stickers seriously? no one except idiots, and people who just don't know any better, the latter which includes most of the us population as a result of our fine education system that does not teach kids how to think anymore. it only trains them. of course the us government does not want a thinking population. anyways i take it, out of the two, you are an idiot. bumper stickers are just a humorous way in most cases, serious in a very few, to state your opinion of what is most likely a complicated issue in a few words. your stupid example of the tax sticker was more lame than the sticker. the individual that put the sticker on his vehicle was just stating in a couple words that he did not like the tax system, that it was unfair. and you know very well that there are us companies that do make millions that do not pay a cent of tax. just because they are incorporated in a foreign country does not mean that they are not american companies. i think anyone that is a us citizen should pay income/profits tax regardless of where the money comes from or where the company is registered/incorporated. if it was up to me there would not be any goddamned privately owned companies anyways and every cent of pure profit would go into the country's' budget. be no more motherfuckers making several million dollars a year as a child starves to death in atlanta. don't even try to bring up the tired old lame argument about people needing incentives to create. i owned a company for 20 years with 5 to 18 employees. when a job was completed i took out a certain percentage for reinvestment into the company, (advertising, tools, etc) and all the costs associated with that job down to and including vehicle and equipment depreciation, fuel, insurance, etc. what was left was split up amoung the employees based on seniority. foremen received bonuses. i made about ten percent more than my top man. when i retired my starting painters made about 30 dollars an hour. and because i paid the way i did i had the best, most dependable painting crew in the city. i could have kept around 500 dollars a day more than i was but i didn't. it was really a lot more complicated that this but in real simple terms so that you can understand, i thought it was more important for my men's children to be well taken care of than for me to be driving a new lexus every year instead of the new lincoln that i bought every three years. i had a good life and i still did a lot for a lot of people over twenty years. motherfuckers making a lot more than they need should have to pay taxes, and a lot of them. fuck a greedy bitch and anyone who supports them. back to bumper stickers, i have a couple on my truck and they are only meant to let people know in a very generalized way my views on a particular issue. my views on patriotism would probably take up at least 20 8.5 x 11 sheets of paper yet i have a sticker that breaks them down into two words, "fight patriotism". of course you can't express a complicated issue in just a few words you moron and anybody that takes a bumper sticker as someones complete view on an issue is a moron. it is impossible to express any idea completely, no matter how simple, in just a couple words, such as a sticker i saw the other day, "somewhere in texas a village has lost its idiot". that short statement would take volumes to express, but most people would get the general idea, except you it seems. i don't suppose your parents ever accused you of being too bright did they? i just cannot believe how idiotic people, (americans), are anymore. i am no raving genius that's for sure, yet i still see the stupidity. how can only a very few others see it. the vast majority don't see it. you need to find you another job, something that does not require a mind because you certainly are no writer, at lest not one that can be taken seriously
64 - Dave Nalle
Clark. I'm glad we agree that people who put simplistic bumper stickers on their cars without thinking them through are idiotic.
Now if we could just agree that paragraphs make rantings easier to read we'd be getting along swimmingly.
i am no raving genius that's for sure,
Quoted for truth.
you need to find you another job, something that does not require a mind because you certainly are no writer, at lest not one that can be taken seriously
You think this is my job??? You really are clueless. But then you thought an article which is clear and obvious satire was meant to be taken seriously, so there's probably no hope for you.
BTW, there's zero chance your comment will get deleted. It's going to stay on the internet forever and haunt you with its stupidity for years to come.
Dave
65 - Christopher Rose
Now then Dave, don't be so rude to the guy. Just cos he's misguided doesn't justify such ignorance.
He could easily make the mistake of thinking this was your job, just as you make the mistake of assuming that people are superficial for using bumper sticker slogans. Play nice now.
66 - Dave Nalle
Overkill you may think, but consider that the inability to use paragraphs properly is a sure sign of a dangerously disordered mind. Better to nip the whole thing in the bud, I say.
Dave
67 - Wayne
I have a sticker that says:
Jihadis can't kill us...If they're DEAD
Support the troops!
and I just ordered a sticker that says:
F
The Democrats
also there's my other favorite:
Except for ending slavery, Communism & Nazism...
War has NEVER solved anything
So all you idiot Fascist/Progressives can kiss my ASS
68 - Mark Saleski
i have a bumper sticker that says "Kill all Extremists"
69 - Andy Marsh
I have two...one says mean people suck...the other says...nice people swallow!