The PBS documentary "Breaking The Silence: Children's Stories" is about child victims of abuse, especially those who have been given to their abusive fathers by the courts. Fathers' and men's rights activists have predictably protested the airing of this documentary, and have demanded that it either not be aired, or that they get so-called equal time to air their side of the issue. Their side is full of unsupported nonsense about women being as abusive as men, women frequently "alienating" men from their children, and women lying frequently to get restraining orders to use as leverage in court in abuse, divorce, and custody cases. PBS is not required to present every side of an issue, especially a side that has no reputable resources to back its point of view. The fathers' rights point of view already gets media coverage. Protective mothers who are seeing their abused children being given to their abusive fathers by the court don't get much media coverage, and this documentary provides them with much needed attention. PBS has given attention to these moms and children that they desperately need.…
Article comments
26 - a child advocate
The problem with PAS is that it is generally gender bias. If what men are calling for is an equal ground, stating that the cards have been stacked against them with regards to Child Custody, perhaps the statistics for all the States should be taken into consideration. The naïve notion that Mother’s are provided custody simply based on the “fact” that they are better able to provide “nurturing” for the children as gone out fifteen years ago. In fact more than 70% of child custody cases the children are awarded to the father. Also, let’s be fair then, put it on equal ground and start prosecuting Father’s on P.A.S. Yes P.A.S is a very cruel form of abuse, as is the lack of possibilities for the voices of those who have truly been abused to be heard. P.A.S. has created an all but impossible road for those who have been abused (for all humans) to travel. When we refuse to allow police reports, previous Court orders, and witnesses to enter the child custody court process, stating that all of this is bias against the alleged abuser, what hope do any of us have left for alleviating the issue of bias or abuse? We should all look toward a solution of creating a level playing field, rather than spending precious time with colorful name calling reducing all involved to infinite wisdom, and think about how this is affecting the children involved;(both Father’s and Mother’s). Children are not possessions to be owned. They are living, breathing human beings, with both God given and Constitutional rights and should be treated as the precious gifts they are. I urge all of you to look in the eyes of a child involved in a custody dispute. Daddy and Mommy using the child as some sort of tug-of-war and take note of the fear placed in those eyes by the individuals who are supposed to be the protectors. What kind of example are you setting? Abuse knows no gender, no side to take; however, does know a pain that will never completely be gone. Dragging children through PAS when abuse has occurred will leave countless children with scars lasting for generations. These children grow up to be your lawyers, Judges, police officers and Doctors. Think about them now, or hear them when you are as venerable as they once were. We all grow old….
27 - tonysprout
[edited] Trish, this so called documentary is full of man hating vitriole. The whole thing smells to high heaven of fish.
Why do we need DV laws? Assault has been against the law, but the police and judges weren't doing their jobs.
When it comes to equality in child custody, the police and judges aren't doing their jobs still. If courts followed their own laws, men would contest custody on a much larger scale. Lack of money and bias in the system hinder men from seeking custody. We need laws in the same vein as DV to make these courts give men a chance at custody. In spite of the fact that a few men contest custody. they still lose 90% of the time.
You want to discuss numbers, Trish? How about 58% of all child abuse is committed by females, most of them the mothers who supposedly have the best interests of the children at heart. See the following:
Author(s): National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse and Neglect Information
link
Year Published: 2005
Perpetrators
Approximately 80 percent of perpetrators were parents. Other relatives accounted for 6 percent, and unmarried partners of parents accounted for 4 percent of perpetrators. The remaining perpetrators included persons with other (camp counselor, school employee, etc.) or unknown relationships to the child victims.
Female perpetrators, who were mostly mothers, were typically younger than male perpetrators, who were mostly fathers. Women also comprised a larger percentage of all perpetrators than men: 58 percent compared to 42 percent.
Of all parents who were perpetrators, fewer than 3 percent were associated with sexual abuse. More than three-quarters of perpetrators who were friends or neighbors committed sexual abuse.
28 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Regarding child abuse, what should be looked at is the amount of time mothers vs. fathers spend with children. To quote another commenter when a similar copy/paste by another men's/fathers' rights activist was pasted on another one of my posts, "women make up a disproportionately high number of primary caregivers, and most of them are that way, not due to any custody challenge, but just because the father is absent or does not care to be the caregiver. This is especially true of single, low-income teen moms. Given that the stats on single parenthood are heavily weighed towards this demographic group, it is no surprise that they make up a disproportionate percentage of abusers.
Despite spending considerably less time with children than do mothers, fathers do a substantial amount of child abuse. Also, mothers are most often cited for neglect. Fathers are most cited for abuse. Child abuse should not be condoned no matter who does it.
To continue to quote the same commenter, "because women make up the vast majority of caretakers, they tend to be held responsible for neglect, which is defined as a form of abuse by HHS, even if the father resides in the home. Note that HHS defines neglect loosely; it can mean failing to get the kids to the doctor "on time" -- and that in a country without health insurance. Not to excuse neglect, but very often it's another name for being poor. When actual physical abuse is separated out, men abuse more than women."
I could post stats on abuse rates of single fathers, but I'm not going to do that because it will take me far off the topic of this post. I'm not going to waste my time in a "who abuses more" argument because that distracts from the topic of this post. I think that might be the purpose of those kinds of arguments.
"Breaking The Silence: Children's Stories" is a much-needed documentary about child abuse victims who are given into the custody of their abusive fathers. These children and their protective mothers are finally getting the media attention that they deserve. Despite a massive pressure campaign by men's and fathers' rights activists, PBS did not pull this documentary, nor is there a men's rights "equal side" in the works. This documentary is being shown to key legislators in order to educate the lawmakers about abused children who are given over to the fathers who abused them. It's a valuable educational tool.
29 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Just a reminder: please note the instruction directly above the commenting window. Personal attacks are not allowed. Discuss the issue at hand, and provide a link and an excerpt from any article you wish to bring up to make your point. Please don't post entire, long articles.
30 - kevin
it's true that Temple University psychiatry professor Paul Fink called PAS "junk science" in a July 1, 2003 Newsday interview, he explained, "There are lots of people who alienate their partners during a divorce. But it is not a syndrome, a disease or a disorder." So the claim that PAS is "junk science" doesn't mean it never happens; it just means it's not a recognized mental illness. Without Fink's full explanation, most people would assume that calling PAS "junk science" means the phenomenon doesn't happen. Dispelling that misimpression would undermine the filmmakers' point,
A copy of the "Guest Editor's Introduction" to the August, 2005 issue of the journal "Violence Against Women" was distributed at the prescreening.
Conduct studies that are carefully designed ignore any inconvenient facts. Popular techniques in this step include: 1) using self-selected rather than randomized population samples,
Come on TRISH we know u arent un-biased,so why on earth would a so-called documentary be considered anything else.
k
31 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Kevin, the American Psychological Association has come out against alienation.
APA Presidential Task Force On Violence And The Family
Psychological evaluators who minimize the importance of violence against the mother, or pathologize her responses to it, may accuse her of alienating the children from the father and may recommend giving the father custody in spite of his history of violence.
Some professionals assume that accusations of physical or sexual abuse of children that arise during divorce or custody disputes are likely to be false, but the empirical research to date shows no such increase in false reporting at that time. In many instances, children are frightened about being alone with a father they have seen use violence towards their mother or a father who has abused them. Sometimes children make it clear to the court that they wish to remain with the mother because they are afraid of the father, but their wishes are ignored.
32 - Elizabeth J. Kates, Esq.
Hello Trish,
Thank you for posting this important discussion. And sorry for my late chiming in -- Hurricane Wilma interfered...
In reading the various comments, I note that there are a number of questions raised about "parental alienation syndrome," "parental alienation," and child abuse. Readers who are interested in answers to this can access the articles under "Parental Alienation Syndrome" at the URL link.
I particularly comment here in response to the innumerate perception that if 58% of "child abuse" is perpetrated by women, individual women, and notably mothers, are more likely to be perpetrators of child abuse than are men. The statistics are kept per incident, per child. When the percentages are adjusted to account for the much higher numbers of female caregivers (compared with male caregivers), numbers of children cared for per female caregiver (compared with numbers of children cared for per male caregiver), amount of time children spend in the care of sole female caregivers (compared with amount of time children spend in the care of sole male caregivers), and types of abuse (women disproportionately are charged with neglect and "failure to protect" claims whereas males overwhelmingly are the perpetrators of severe physical abuse against older children as well as sexual abuse), children statistically are at far, FAR higher risk in the care of males than females.
Moreover, child killings by women are sufficiently rare that they tend to make major headline news, whereas murders of children by enraged men, including suicide-murders, are so common that these events tend to get buried in small local articles that just do not receive widespread attention from the media.
Another misconception that is being spread around of late is the notion that we do not need domestic violence laws because assault and battery against anyone already is against the law. This may be true, but the comment is extraordinarily ignorant. Among other reasons for the need for these laws is that in cases of stranger assaults, the perpetrator does not get out on bail and go back to live in the same home with the victim pending trial. Could you imagine the outcry that would ensue if victims of stranger-perpetrated crimes had to open their homes and the details of their lives to men who had raped or battered them! It's unfathomable to me that anyone could fail to recognize this problem.
liz
33 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Thanks for posting, Liz. I hope the hurricane didn't do you too much damage.
As one of my commenters had posted, which supports your statements, government studies on child abuse tend to focus their attention on the demographic of poor, single mothers with no father present. Even when the father is present, since the mother is most often the primary caregiver of the children, she would be charged with "failure to protect", even if it was her husband or boyfriend who had done the actual abuse. Fathers are not charged with "failure to protect" to the extent that mothers are.
It is true that fathers do more serious child abuse than mothers. Thank you for pointing out the details about that.
The latest attacks against his documentary are related to Parental Alienation Syndrome not being accepted by the American Psychological Association. The APA Task Force on Violence and the Family did much more than "simply say there are no data to support PAS," per fathers' rights and PAS supporters. That is a misrepresentation of the statement made by the Task Force. The Task Force actually said the following [bold emphasis mine]:
I've noticed another attack of late is to present one of the mothers covered in the documentary as a child abuser, per documentation provided by the allegedly abusive father. This father has been circulating his legal paperwork and statements made by those who support his side since the time the documentary was being filmed. These are old documents. The daughter in question wrote in her own words about abuse she had experienced from her father and stepfather, but fathers' rights activists of course believe she is being coached by her mother. Her statement is here:
Fatima's Story
She wrote those statements last year. Please note that the documentary is about abused children who are not being heard. They present their experiences of abuse by their fathers, and their statements are being ignored and twisted into "evidence" of PAS. This latest campaign by fathers' rights activists amounts to attacking a child and not believing her own stated experiences about abuse at the hands of her father and stepmother. She is being ignored - one of the important points of the documentary. Fathers' rights activists are proving the documentary correct in attacking her.
34 - Elizabeth J. Kates, Esq.
I am adding this additional comment to correct the misinformation Teri Stoddard and "tonysprout" keep repeating, that "women win 90% of contested custody" actions.
This is not true. They are confusing the somewhat stale statistic that mothers tend to obtain custody about 90% of the time in cases of divorce that involve children. For the most part, these are not contested cases, but rather, cases involving essentially healthy men who were the primary wage earners for their families and who recognize that the mothers in these cases have been the primary caregivers -- and thus, the men do not contest primary placement of the children with the mother (or else contest only minor aspects of the custody case or place custody at issue in only the most pro forma way.)
In contested cases, and in high conflict cases, men prevail in their claims more than half to upward of 70% of the time. The statistics recited by the documentary in this regard were substantially correct. Given that extremely few of these men were the primary caregivers during their marriages, this is an extraordinary denigration of the value of women's experience, effort and lives, not to mention painful, disruptive, and disorienting for most of those children involved who are more strongly attached to their mothers.
liz
http://www.thelizlibrary.org/liz/
35 - Blue Maas, BSN, DVM, PhD
I so, so want to THANK MY IOWA PUBLIC TELEVISION STATION, http://www.iptv.org , for its airing the documentary, "BREAKING the SILENCE: CHILDREN'S STORIES." "Parental Alienation Syndrome" IS junk, patriarchal oppression on the order of several other such misogynist "medical syndromes" and keeps oppressed the mothers. For almost two decades now there has been an over - run in family law court of SPECIFICALLY giving over to the ABUSING father NOT ONLY full custody of the children BUT ALSO DADDEE'S "OVERSEEING" the mama's rights, IF SHE HAS ANY, to the VERY CHILDREN SHE LITERALLY ... GREW.
WHEN WHEN WHEN the same abuses, eg, PORNOGRAPHY CONSUMPTION and USE IN FRONT OF and TO THE MINOR CHILDREN, WOULD BE CRIMES PUNISHABLE BY IMPRISONMENT AND FINES -- IF IF IF PERPETRATED BY, O say, the NEIGHBORS NEXT DOOR and DOWN THE STREET.
INSTEAD, THO, SINCE DADDEE PERPETRATED THESE CRIMES == == HE GETS THE KIDS -- AND THE PROTECTIVE MOM GOES TO HELL.
AGAIN, I SO, SO THANK YOU, Mz. TRISH WILSON for your splendid, liars'- / crimes' - busting BLOG!
Blue Maas, BSN, DVM, PhD
Central IOWA
ps: As a protective, losing mama stated already some half - decade ago, "'N' THERE AIN'T NO JUDGE WHO DUDN'T ... SURF PORN!" She is sooooo right.
36 - Jon Starnes
Liz and Co.
you can manipulate the facts every which way to Sunday, but the stats are stats; women are abusers. You are also proving the point we fathers are trying to fight for; that women benefit from gender bias and receive more time with children than men.
I am a father fighting for time. My ex cusses me out in front of our sons, 3 and 8, and witholds visitation. I have to move mountains and pay fees to even dispute this. Justice should insure my right to visitation.
The ONE time I reacted to her witholding, by following her back to her apartment to negotiate in person, she calls the police and a record is created. I only raised my voice once over the cell phone, to say she could not deny my time. I made no threat, did not act angry and was pleading with her. She would hang up on me. This is how most men are reported and they don't even have to say or do anything other than being present. Yes; many of you women are SO heroic and honorable.
She is fighting to get me out of the picture, but I will not give up. I surely hope PBS rises to the challenge of letting an alternate group air it's refute of the slight of hand, gender slander that was "Breaking the Silence".
PAS does exist. I can give you dozens of examples of "opinions" she has instilled into the head of the older (8) child. He tells me and quotes his mom, nearly verbatim "You are irresponsible", and so on.
She also has trained the 3 year old to call me "Jon" and to call the step-dad (charged for domestic violence in 2003) "dad". Kaiden rights himself, but is confused.
If you want equality, support presumptive Joint Legal and Physical Custody. If not, continue to fight the patriarchy and punish anyone of the male gender for the "alleged" sins of their fathers.
37 - Don, the 14%er
Even though it has been proven Sadia Loeliger - portrayed as a heroic mom in PBS's documentary Breaking the Silence - abused children under her care, Trish Wilson defends her. Is there any woman - Susan Smith, Andrea Yates, any woman throughout the annals of history - that Trish Wilson will not defend?
38 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
Don, stop repeating verbatim what you find at Glen Sacks's web site. Sadiya Loeliger has not abused children under her care. She has had custody of her daughter, Fatima, since 2004. Anyone reading who believes the outdated, inaccurate documentation they have found at Glen Sacks's site should read my Breaking The Silence web site. Updated, accurate documentation is available there, including several statements by the teenaged daughter, Fatima Loeliger. Fatima has stated that she wants to live with her mother, and now she does.
39 - Don, the 14%er
Thank you Trish, for your calm reasoned response. But you failed to answer my question:
Is there any woman - Susan Smith, Andrea Yates, any woman throughout the annals of history - that Trish Wilson will not defend?
40 - victim of the
Thank you Ms. Wilson for your coverage of the Breaking the Silence documentary.
Shame on those individuals who are attacking you for your coverage of this crisis. In attacking you, they are also indirectly attacking abused women and children.
Online, one can see that a few misguided individuals are trying to turn attention away from the issues addressed in the documentary. Thank you Ms. Wilson for helping the public to understand that the issues addressed in the documentary are not about politics or religion or about varying interpretations of statistics. Thank you for helping the public to understand that the documentary is about the national crisis involving abusers vs. their victims in family courts. Period.
Most of the general public has still not seen the documentary and still has no idea that sociopaths walk into our family courts every day and, through the use of the "PAS" scam/legal tactic, easily take custody of children away from protective parents. The general public has no idea that there is no mandatory training or minimal requirements for evaluators, judges or attorneys who handle domestic violence and/or sexual abuse cases in family courts.
I would think that most good people would see the documentary and say something like, "Gee, that's terrible if it's true. Maybe we should look into that and find out if we need to do a better job protecting abuse victims in our family courts."
Mark Rosenthal has been one of the most outspoken critics of the documentary. Perhaps Mr. Rosenthal would show some sympathy for victims of the "PAS" scam if I put it this way:
Sort of like 60 years ago in Germany, the "PAS" label makes abused mothers and children in this country wear a yellow star - or leave society via an underground railroad. Today in this country, there are those who would want others to believe that there was no holocaust.
Thank you Ms. Wilson. You are saving lives.
41 - Don, the 14%er
I am still waiting on an answer from Ms Wilson on my question (two posts up). And, by the way, I do not repeat the verbatim from Glen Sacks's web site. I don't follow the campaign of the Boston-based Fathers and Families either. Meanwhile,
"Breaking the Silence" continues to receive damaging reviews. This article is from boston.com
I have suggested to Dominuque Lasseur that to regain his credibility and good name, he could produce a documentary that shows the multifarious injustices towards fathers in the legal system. I don't expect an answer from him either.
***********************************************
PBS's negative picture of fathers
By Cathy Young | November 21, 2005
CHILD CUSTODY battles are always wrenching, particularly when there are allegations of abuse. For years fathers' rights groups have complained that men face a pervasive bias in family courts, while many feminists have countercharged that the real bias is against women. The latest round of this debate is being waged over a documentary, ''Breaking the Silence: Children's Stories," which has been airing on Public Broadcasting Service affiliates in the past month.
The film's point is simple: Children in America are routinely ripped from their mothers and given to fathers who are batterers or molesters. The women's claims of abuse are not believed by the courts and are even held against them when mothers are suspected of manufacturing false charges as a divorce strategy.
To fathers' groups, ''Breaking the Silence" is blatant antidad propaganda. In a campaign led by the Boston-based Fathers and Families, PBS has been bombarded with thousands of calls and letters. It is now conducting a 30-day review of the research used in the film.
Film producer Dominique Lasseur told me he was shocked by the backlash. ''I have nothing against fathers," says Lasseur, a father of two, ''but I have outrage about children being given to abusers."
There is no question that our legal system fails children all too often. But the PBS documentary presents a skewed and sensationalist picture.
Thus, Joan Meier, a George Washington University law professor and one of the film's main experts, asserts that ''75 percent of contested custody cases have a history of domestic violence" and that about two-thirds of fathers ''accused or adjudicated of battering" win sole or joint custody of their children.
The website of the film's producers, Tatge/Lasseur productions, lists two sources for these claims: a study of 39 abused women involved in custody litigation in Massachusetts, and the 1990 report of the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court Gender Bias Study Committee which states that fathers who actively seek custody obtain primary or joint physical custody over 70 percent of the time.
But the 70 percent figure was not limited to domestic violence cases. It is also highly misleading, since it doesn't separate custody disputes from cases in which the father gets custody by mutual consent. In contested custody cases, mothers are two to four times more likely to prevail.
''Breaking the Silence" seems to suggest that abusers who get custody of their children are virtually always male. In response to criticism, the filmmakers say on their site that since ''women are five to eight times more likely than men to be victimized by an intimate partner," to feature one male victim of abuse alongside five women would have ''overstated the problems of men."
The accuracy of their figures is questionable: the federally funded National Violence against Women Survey suggests that over a third of domestic violence victims are male. That aside, doesn't featuring zero abusive mothers significantly understate that problem?
Lasseur told me that if he had encountered cases in which an abusive mother was awarded custody of the children, he would have reported on them. I asked about the claim on a battered men's advocacy site that a man named Tom Gallen had approached him with exactly such a case. Lasseur conceded that Gallen had a well-documented story but explained that, relying on his ''instinct as a producer," he felt that Gallen wouldn't be the right person to use.
It's difficult to assess the credibility of the stories actually used in the film, since their presentation is deliberately one-sided. (Lasseur told me that women's allegations of abuse are often ''dismissed because it's he said/she said," and that he didn't want to recreate that dynamic.) In at least one case, involving a 16-year-old identified as ''Amina," there are serious questions about the film's accuracy.
Official documents supplied by the girl's father, Scott Loeliger, and posted at www.glennsacks.com, show that there were fairly serious child abuse allegations against ''Amina's" mother. Moreover, the only spousal abuse mentioned in these documents is violence toward the father by the mother.
The documents also reveal a messy, complicated case in which most evaluators concluded that both parents were behaving ''abominably." ''Breaking the Silence" simplifies this into a straightforward story of a villainous man and a noble, victimized woman, and does so in the service of a film whose overall effect is to vilify fathers.
The filmmakers contend that their only concern was the well-being of children. Yet, if the film contributes to a climate in which fathers who seek custody are tagged as suspected abusers, it could endanger children as well. PBS should rectify this bias by presenting programs with a different point of view.
Cathy Young is a contributing editor at Reason magazine. Her column appears regularly in the Globe.
42 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
That wasn't a question, Don the 14ther. It was a personal attack. I feel no need to address it.
Thanks for the kind words, "victim of the", Fathers' rights activists and their supporters like Cathy Young can keep attacking the documentary all they like. It doesn't change the important impact its making. It's been shown to legislators and others who work with children in several states already, and it's going to be shown more in 2006. I know that PBS released a notice to its employees instructing them how to respond to the hostile phone calls, e-mails, and letters from angry fathers' rights activists. That was a smart move. There is no reason that PBS employees should have to deal with endless venom from angry fathers' rights activists. I know that PBS's letter of instruction was leaked to Glenn Sacks, who posted it on his web site. Good for PBS. It isn't going to bow down to bully tactics from fathers' rights activists.
43 - LL
Here's a case to consider: Two domestic partners (women) split up and the adoptive parent brings the biological mother to family court for custody and child support of their two children. The abusive, bipolar, alcoholic adoptive parent makes any and all joint custody arrangements impossible and the biological mother seeks sole custody. Most of what "Breaking the Silence" describes holds true in this case as well: forensic evaluator ignored the evidence that the adoptive parent is unstable and her parenting abilities dubious, law guardian did not represent the children's wishes to live with their mother and ultimately the mother who had been the primary care-giver lost all custody of the children she was desperately trying to protect.
It goes to show that you don't need the classic male/female set of parents to arrive at the same abuser/abused situation.
As I don't consider living with an abusive individual with in anyone's best interest, I have to say that Family Court once again failed to meet the children's "best interests" standard. By a mile, sadly enough.
44 - Tom C.
Well, the Corporation for Public Broadcasting just issued a negative report about BTS. And AFTER Tomlinson was kicked out.
Looks very bad, indeed for the producers of that program.
And, it looks like the Supreme Court will be taking MAJOR turn to the right. VAWA is hung up in the House, Fitzmas was a bust, the Sheehan crowd got handed a 403-3 drubbing, the Democrats are dead in the water, and so we can look to seeing the Republicans INCREASE their majorities in 2006.
The future is bright, indeed!
Trish, Liz - and your friends from NOW - just keep doing what you are doing!
Heck, the harder you do what you do - the more press releases you send out, the more "outrage" you express - and the more you say outrageous things - the better it works out for us!
You GO, girls!!! This ROCKS!
45 - Jon Reisfeld
Whoa!
Let me see if I heard you correctly.
You wrote:
"Their [men's] side is full of unsupported nonsense about women being as abusive as men, women frequently "alienating" men from their children, and women lying frequently to get restraining orders to use as leverage in court in abuse, divorce, and custody cases. PBS is not required to present every side of an issue, especially a side that has no reputable resources to back its point of view.
I am a former journalist and I can tell you that PBS certainly is responsible for presenting "every side of an issue" -- particularly when it aires material that it presents as balanced, responsible reporting, rather than propaganda. Clearly, the CPB and PBS ombudsmen, agree with me, since they both condemned PBS's decision to aire the story in question, citing its total lack of objectivity and misrepresentation of the specific facts of the case.
Whenever I hear someone who wants to limit opposing views, I know I'm dealing with an extremist. Extremists think there's only one correct view, too: their view. I'm sure Osama Bin Laden would feel the same way about PBS airing a report that made Al Qaeda out to be a misunderstood humanitarian organization.
As for your remarks that it's "nonsense" to suggest that women can be as abusive as men, I must ask if you remember the case of the young mother -- I believe her last name was Brown, from the Carolinas, who strapped her children into the back of her car and drove them into a lake a few years ago.... What about the woman who recently ripped a baby child out of the belly of its mother, because she wanted a baby of her own?" Or better yet, what about the two female suicide bombers who killed dozens of people in Iraq earlier today. I've never heard such "nonsense" as yours, if you think one's propsensity for abusive behavior is determined -- at birth -- by whether they were given two "X" chromosomes rather than an "X" and a "Y."
46 - Jon Reisfeld
Whoa!
Let me see if I heard you correctly.
You wrote:
"Their [men's] side is full of unsupported nonsense about women being as abusive as men, women frequently "alienating" men from their children, and women lying frequently to get restraining orders to use as leverage in court in abuse, divorce, and custody cases. PBS is not required to present every side of an issue, especially a side that has no reputable resources to back its point of view.
I am a former journalist and I can tell you that PBS certainly is responsible for presenting "every side of an issue" -- particularly when it aires material that it presents as balanced, responsible reporting, rather than propaganda. Clearly, the CPB and PBS ombudsmen, agree with me, since they both condemned PBS's decision to aire the story in question, citing its total lack of objectivity and misrepresentation of the specific facts of the case.
Whenever I hear someone who wants to limit opposing views, I know I'm dealing with an extremist. Extremists think there's only one correct view, too: their view. I'm sure Osama Bin Laden would feel the same way about PBS airing a report that made Al Qaeda out to be a misunderstood humanitarian organization.
As for your remarks that it's "nonsense" to suggest that women can be as abusive as men, I must ask if you remember the case of the young mother -- I believe her last name was Brown, from the Carolinas, who strapped her children into the back of her car and drove them into a lake a few years ago.... What about the woman who recently ripped a baby child out of the belly of its mother, because she wanted a baby of her own?" Or better yet, what about the two female suicide bombers who killed dozens of people in Iraq earlier today. I've never heard such "nonsense" as yours, if you think one's propsensity for abusive behavior is determined -- at birth -- by whether they were given two "X" chromosomes rather than an "X" and a "Y."
47 - The Countess (Trish Wilson)
It's true that women are not as abusive as men. The Susan Smith case is alway trotted out by people who insist that most child abuse is committed by women. That case made the news precisely because it was so unusual. Government reports that men's/fathers' rights activists cite in their claims that mothers commit most child abuse focus on single mother homes where no father is present. These reports especially focus on teen mothers with no father present. It's no wonder that those reports find so many abusive single mothers - they are actively looking at mothers living in poverty who have no father around to help raise the kids. Plus, when abuse and neglect are separated, these reports find that fathers commit the most abuse. Mothers are most often cited for neglect. Neglect could be something is simple as not taking the children to the doctor - this in a country with abhorrent medical coverage. Poverty is the problem here. It's not as simple as the false claim that mothers commit the most child abuse.
Mothers are often accused of and convicted of "failure to intervene" even though the father, boyfriend, or stepfather was the person who committed the abuse. So, mothers will be blamed for child abuse committed by men. Men are not often accused of or convicted of "failure to intervene".
I found it especially interesting that if fathers' rights groups were able to stop attacking "Breaking the Silence: Children's Stories" long enough to make their own documentary, PBS is not likely to air it - for the very same reason that father's rights activists are claiming PBS had no business airing "Breaking The Silence". A fathers' rights documentary would rightly be viewed as advocacy, and therefore not appropriate for PBS.
This letter was posted on a father's rights mailing list. It was sent to a guy who wanted PBS to air a documentary presenting the fathers' rights side:
Despite the protests, "Breaking The Silence: Children's Stories" is being shown to legislators and others who work on custody and children's issues. It has already been shown in Massachusetts and California. Alaska is going to show it soon. The documentary is getting attention paid towards abused children and protective mothers, which is as it should be.
48 - Hoosier Love
here
Quite a site I must say for a first-time reader. A male, proud father of three, with the two youngest. My other filed for divorce Feb '02. A month later, she locked me out (criminal lockout) and when she later allowed me back in that same morning only because she overhead my phonecalls outside the opened windows, I told her that I called the police on her. Her words? "Good! I'll just tell 'em you hit me. It'll be your word against mine and there's nothing you can do about it!" She pulled that that same ace on me on January 6, 2003 and played out the dramatics of being a "victim". "Oh, protect me! He hit me! I want him out of here!" Meanwhile, her sister came over, and stood beside Angelica who was seated, and rubbing onto Angelica's left shoulder as if to comfort her in this fake injury. Even the police felt something was fishy about Angelica. There are some little brats who grow up into a woman's body, but still cannot let go of their juvenile tendencies from their vindictive childhood past. Angelica's real father was not around since about age 2 or 3 yrs. Some women do not deserve to be in the shadow of their children and that of a good man. It is an honor that my two minor children look up to me more favorably than the liar "biological mother" who had to use the nasty game to win physical custody and support of this good, loving, decent man. Men: Save yourselves, and come and unite against these trash. There are women out there who use every trick in the book, handed down by their mentors along the way, and the trash attorneys who coach them on how to manipulate the divorce legal system to their advantage at the expense of the children's emotional and physical well-being, all for the sake of a bit of money and to be glorified of their present twisted status as a "parent". Women of this nature should rightly be ashamed, if they can ever fathom the true meaning. Shame upon you, "trash mothers" if YOU do these twisted games. Your biological child or children will grow to despise you for tearing up their hearts and minds. You will pay the price when these innocents refuse to show you love and respect for the trash you are. That is the ultimate revenge of any man that a child can repay you for your ungrateful, demented behavioral problems. Women of your nature actually do regret the day they were born. You will also grow old, wither away, and die, a lonely creature of bad habits. Thank GOD when that day comes.
49 - sasha
truth be told to all you who think women are completely faultless and men are evil. i live with a very abusive mother. very. my father on the other hand tries to stick up for me when ever she is around and never allows her to touch me. she in turn abuses me when he isn't here. so, why dont u all think about that. mothers can be extremely abusive, just step into my life.
50 - Cindy Johnsons
"PBS Portrays Known Child Abusers as Heros." Thanks to PBS, and Dr. Joan Meier of George Washington Univ Law school - We know now this is biased reporting.
George Washington University law school professors Dr Joan Meier (who appears to lend her University position status and credibility to flawed & biased research that went into "Breaking the silence - Children's stories".
The program is larded with Leftist fantasies and sweeping stereotypes that a University Professor lent credibility to. What shameful deceit... that too from a Univ Professor... George Washington Univ law school has stooped to a new low.... I am sorry to say.
CPB Ombudsman reports: Breaking the Silence Redux
"Breaking the Silence: Children's Stories"
PBS's Breaking the Silence: An Assault on Fatherhood
PBS Portrays Known Child Abuser as Hero. Thanks to PBS and Dr. Joan Meier of George Washington Univ Law school
PBS Film Controversy Continues
51 - kevin smith
Well i think that other than genitalia and probably a little different wiring as to problem solving and thought etc. Men and women are human and are both equally capable of violence,love,hate,caring,compassion and all other aspects of our humanity.A woman is just as qualified as a man to be president and achieve whatever a man can,and should be allowed and encouraged to do so!!!
If equality is the goal then i think the womens movement neeeds to re-analyze some of their thinking on their victim mentallity and their refusal to accept responsibilty 4 their long standing 1 sidedness and attempts to divide the sexes and their unrelenting support of at times downright evil women and their acts solely based on gender.
And to say that Todays family court is anything but a place where MEN are raped daily, and legally to boot,is common knowledge amongst most of society and for some reason as men we are just supposed to suck it up and take it like a man.I would even say that MOST of the time MOM IS the best choice but to just assume that is wrong.
JUst my opinion
kevin
52 - James
I want to see what Mary Ann Mason looks like. She doesn't show a pic anywhere. I bet she is ugly as hell and that's why she hates men--none of them could possibly be physically attracted to her.
By the way, the SAFEST place for a child is with his/her father. The most common abusers/molestors are mothers or THE NEW BOYFRIEND that they allow around the kids because in situations where children are abused, most of the time, the mother doesn't care about the child, but the child is only a piece of leverage.
Just look at all the anti-father feminist talk. There's NO ROOM for two parents in their agenda. Look at ALL the pro-father movement: always in the conversation is shared parenting, two-parent involvement. So, who's the out-of-hand control freaks? THE FEMINISTS. Anyone with 1/2 a brain can look through the hot-air rhetoric and see there is no logic/substance behind it.
53 - ann
Seems as though everyone wants to protect mommy/daddy rights. WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN? My son was forced to go to visitation with an abusive father the proof is in cps and court records. I havent had child support in 7 years so thats not it, I paid for food and transportation to get him to his dads so thats not it COULD IT BE THERE"S ABUSE? Yep thats it. Get off it there are legitimate caseas there but you all make it sound as if its all lies everytime. I say PROVE IT!
54 - tamis
My granddaughter is forced to be with her father who has abused and neglected her,and abused her mother for over 2 yrs, now he gets to do it in court regularly at our expense,including us having to drive the baby 5 hrs one way EOW plus holidays at our expense, stay in a hotel,while he drives 15 minutes.
my daughter moved from Va from father and came back home to WV for help. He has had 4 different residences in past yr,each further away. he has not been ordered to pay child support yet, but have filed again in WV.The child is also under the care of a state sponsored program to provide support by a child psychologist, and the child isnt even 2 yet. he yells to court we wont let him talk to child but have 30 tapes that shows otherwise. Now threatens CPS is going to take her from both due to his repeated lies and rantings. How can a parent protect their child from an abuser AND the courts?