I know that I drive a little faster than the rest of the population. I also know that some people would say I drive “crazy” or “like a maniac”, but honestly I don’t see what the hell you are talking about. Just because I know how to drive doesn’t mean I drive like a nut job. I just want to get where I am going.
Case in point: how many times have you been stuck behind the person going slow in the left lane? This moron has got to be able to tell that there is a line of cars directly behind him. If you are in the left lane and you are going under the speed limit then guess what? YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO DRIVE. The left lane is for passing slower traffic (which stays in the right lane). Hence the “slower moving traffic keep right signs”. It’s not for Sunday drivers or for when you are turning left 6 miles ahead. You will have plenty of time to get into the left lane when you get near your turn. A lot of times you are the reason that there is a traffic build up. I can’t tell you how many times I am driving to or from work and get stuck behind someone going the same speed or less than the cars in the right lane. If you are neck and neck with the car next to you then get the fuck behind them. You are obviously not going to win the race.
Another annoyance is the “slow turner”. This guy isn’t sure enough about where he is going or how he is going to get there. He makes his turn like he wants to make sure his car actually can turn. If you want to get into the Rite Aid, then by all means, turn the fuck in. Don’t dilly-dally like you want to make sure there is really a parking lot and not a hole into the center of the earth. It’s really there, I am almost 100% positive it is not an optical illusion. So get in there. Make your turn and mean it. Don’t you want to get where you are going? Think about the people behind you who want to keep going. Parking lots are big just so that it’s easy to get into them.
And people who slow down everytime something is going down on the side of the road — construction, someone changing a tire, something bright and shiny, etc. What are you looking at? And why the hell are you slowing down? Why, on a two-sided, double split roadway, would you need to slow down when there is something going on way across the street? Hey jack-off, it has nothing to do with you. Either mind your own buisness and keep going, or get the hell out of the way. I don’t care if you pull over, get out of the car, and go check it out. If that’s your thing then indulge yourself. Also you don’t need to slow down to less than the speed limit because a cop has someone pulled over. Hello, he’s already pulled someone over, you’re safe. I’m not saying whizz by and knock his Tropper hat off, but geeze do you need to drop below 40? Come on…
Also, maybe its time we raise the driving age. I mean I’m not saying that all 17- and 18-year-olds can’t drive, but I have seen quite a few that certainly shouldn’t be behind a wheel. Maybe we just need to make the test more difficult or something. I work with some younger kids and honestly, they are absolutely terrible drivers. One young girl has already had two accidents. How does that happen? Well, let’s see. She isn’t coordinated, isn’t even mildly alert, is about as bright as a 10-watt bulb, and has as much sense as a rock. The driving test is a joke. It certainly doesn’t teach any defensive driving techniques or even real situations. The test is more like a ‘how to park’ class. At least take them out on the road or something. I don’t ever worry about my driving, I always worry about other peoples’ driving. These girls don’t even understand basic laws like who gets to turn first at an intersection, or the principles behing yielding and passing.
Also, I am a firm believer that you should have to retake your drivers test at certain times of your life. When you are too old to walk, you shouldn’t drive. If you don’t have good motor skills then maybe you shouldn’t be driving a motor vehicle. I think if you retire you should have to retake the test. I mean there are people driving who are legally blind. How does that happen? I don’t want to take everyone’s license away when they get to 65, but have you ever driven behind a senior citizen or watched them manuver through traffic? It’s freakin’ scary, man. Plus, if they can’t remember the date how are they going to remember how to drive? Their coordination is shot by that age. Plus they nod off a lot.
I am sure that there are a million people who will have the opposite opinion, but I just wanted to put it out there. I was once told that no matter how much I thought I was going to love to drive, that when I got older I would grow to hate it. Well I don’t hate it at all, but I do hate other drivers.
GET OUT OF MY WAY DAMN YOU!