Or: attempt to drive a nail into a 2x4 with a piece of fruit cake. Yep. Me, Stepson #1, and cousin Raymond went out into the garage and had our own mini sideshow with a board, a nail, and Mom's failed fruitcake. She was somewhat appalled at our audacity but then laughed when she saw the video. This fruitcake will go down in Saleski lore as one of the freakiest ever. The recipe (which I will not post due to fear of lawsuit) was a strange one: no eggs, a crazy amount of dried fruits, and what seemed like way too much cooking time. I tell you, this "cake" has some heft too it. Apparently, enough heft to drive a nail into a chunk of pine.
Happy Thanksgiving.
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Article comments
1 - Tom Johnson
Mark, you've got to get that fruitcake-hammer video on the internet.
As for me, I've got to get out and pick up that Waits set. I have a feeling today will not end without it in my possession, regardless of me wanting to avoid shopping on Black Friday. I feel the need . . .
2 - Vern Halen
For many years I didn't get Tom Waits either. Whaddya mean - the WEIRD stuff? Didja ever hear him sing Ho Ho Hi Ho It's Off to Work We Go from the Disney inspired Stay Awake compilation?
But I did get TW eventually via swordfishtrombones - on that album he transcended being a weird blues guy into somethinig else entirely - a man who could write about a song about a little rat like dog named Carlos and a couple of mickeys and a big fire. And it didn't seem so weird anymore. Go fig.
3 - Mark Saleski
i know what you mean. my first direct exposure was hearing "Pasties & a G-String" on the radio. i immediately bought Small Change and then went on to get The Black Rider.
but it wasn't until i saw Waits live that i really got it.
4 - Glen Boyd
I'm a lot more partial to the earlier Waits stuff, circa "Nighthawks At the Diner" to roughly about "Blue Valentine." I just really liked that whole vagabond poet sort of vibe about him around that time. That song "Eggs And Sauasge" off "Nighthawks"? I dont know about you guys but I've been in more than my fair share of diners like that. That said, the whole "Bastards" disc you reference sounds pretty cool Mark--I'll have to check that one out.
As for the fruitcake--I personally don't know anyone who actually eats those things so I guess all I can add to that is "Bon Apetit"!
Good move on staying away from the Black Friday madness too Mark.
Hope you had a happy thanksgiving!
-Glen
5 - Mark Saleski
glen, i love Nighthawks-era Waits too. that particular record is fantastic. funny too!
6 - Glen Boyd
I saw Waits around that time--actually I think it may have been for the tour he did for "Small Change."
But it was just Waits with a basic jazz trio -- standup bass and drums. The show was just jaw dropping incredible. We also met him afterwards by going to the side door at the Paramount. The guy I went with was a hardcore Tom Waits fan who was kinda star struck, but I'll never forget Waits odd graciousness. My friend stuck his hand out to Waits and said "It's an honor meeting you sir."
And Waits replied in that famous whiskey and cigarettes croak of His: "No sir, the honor is all mine..."
Priceless.
-Glen
7 - Vern Halen
So...can someoone clear up for me what happened here.... something about Tom Waits sued Chester Cheetah, the Cheetos tiger thing (well, cheetah, I guess) for stealing his voice a long time ago? Or is that an urban myth?
8 - Glen Boyd
Haven't heard that story before Vern. But if it's an urban myth, its a damn good one. Even better if there is any truth to it.
-Glen
9 - Mark Saleski
Waits sue frito lay. no urban myth. story here
10 - Gordon Hauptfleisch
I think "Fruitcakes" would've been a good name for one of the "Orphans" sides. I'm waiting until to Monday to buy it though--I don't go to any stores during the retail "black weekend." But 54 songs? That's a lot of good stuff to delve into: Remember, baby steps...
I too, met Waits once--got me a gracious and gentlemanly handshake. I like his old stuff, but I've come to also appreciate the later direction-- "Raindogs" is in my all-time top-ten.
And the Waits contribution to the Disney anthology "Stay Awake" will indeed scare the neighbors and wake the kids.
11 - Mark Saleski
update: The Fruitcake Hammer on YouTube