Forget spandex and studded leather cuffs, this is Brooks Brothers rock!
The National Review has compiled a list of the top 50 conservative rock songs. In true conservative fashion, it's not available on their website. They'd rather you pony up the dough to buy a print copy of the magazine. The whole list plus capsule explanations has been reprinted on the New York Times website, which only asks for a free registration so they can track your every move like the NSA.
So what's a conservative rock song, exactly? John Miller explains:
The lyrics must convey a conservative idea or sentiment, such as skepticism of government or support for traditional values. And, to be sure, it must be a great rock song.
As far as I'm concerned, they stumbled right out of the gate. Since when is skepticism of government a conservative value alone? Does that make people who think the Bush administration knew about 9/11 conservatives?
Anyway, on to the list. There are a number of songs that are justifiably included here, including several anti-abortion numbers like "Brick," by Ben Folds Five and "The Icicle Melts," by the Cranberries. Apart from these types of songs, the reasoning gets a bit more tenuous. They included "Taxman, Mr. Thief," by Cheap Trick (number 45) and "Taxman," by the Beatles (number 2) for obvious reasons. But is it really conservative to not want to pay taxes? Nobody wants to pay taxes. The only difference is that liberals want other people to pay taxes.
A huge number of songs on the list made it simply because they express anti-Communist ideas. They include "Sympathy for the Devil" (Satan inspired Bolshevism), "Right Here, Right Now," by Jesus Jones, "Heroes," by David Bowie, "Der Kommissar," by After the Fire (really) and "Wind of Change," by the Scorpions (scandalously left to languish at number 46) amongst others. They even included that notoriously right-wing band Creedence Clearwater Revival for "Who'll Stop the Rain," thanks to a passing reference to 5-year plans and the New Deal. As much as the National Review would like to rewrite history, however, they can't erase the fact that huge numbers of liberals opposed Communism, particularly as expressed in the Soviet Union and the Eastern Bloc. Being pro-Communist may well be a left-wing position, but being anti-Communist is by no means an exclusively right-wing ideal.
The number one spot is claimed by the Who for "Won't Get Fooled Again," which deflates the nitrous oxide bubble of hippy idealism. Considering the fact that Townshend and Company have an equally dim view of the alternative, it's not quite fair to call the song conservative. Anti-hippy? Sure, but more nihilistic than conservative. Maybe they were drawn to it because of this line: "I get on my knees and pray." The number 7 slot goes to "Revolution," by the Beatles, both for its anti-Mao sentiment and for its criticism of the 1968 youth protest movements. It beggars belief that the whip smart fellows over at National Review would accuse the author of "Imagine" of being a conservative.
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Article comments
— go to most recent comments1 - Sister Ray
The real conservative/libertarian idea is skepticism of the need for government, not just questioning the government's veracity in a particular situation. "That government is best which governs least" is a conservative thought.
Charlie Daniels and Hank Williams Jr. have songs about country boys' self-reliance, if you want to include those artists in the rock genre.
2 - Pete Blackwell
Hey, they got Tammy Wynette in there, so why not!
3 - RogerMDillon
Godzilla was created or awoken, I can't remember, by nuclear testing, but I don't know if that's what BOC was referring to.
Who'll Stop the Rain was about Vietnam. How did they miss that?
"Won't Get Fooled Again" was quoted by Bush when he misquoted the "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice" line. It must have got points for that.
4 - J. P. Spencer
Who's kidding who? The conservatives I know either like standards from the 40's, Toby Keith or misogynistic heavy metal like Motley Crue and Ted Nugent. And that's just in my own family, who are the most vicious bunch of racist Italians you'll ever want to meet. Conservatives usually think that the lamest rock cliches are just the coolest thing in the world. Most of the people on this list are people they blatantly attacked when they were at their peak for their drug use. Republicans just need to get used to the idea that they are dorks without rhythm, and stop name-dropping Ben Folds for street credibility.
NOW who's not getting fooled again?
5 - mediocrates
Ben Folds commented on his live album that 'Brick' wasn't written from any political standpoint, and that he was just trying to capture what it felt like to get an abortion. He and his girlfriend had an abortion when he was in high school (inspiring the song) so clearly he supported it at one time, although I don't know what his feelings about it are now.
6 - Donnieb78
If these are conservative songs, then...
I give you The National Review's Top 25 Conservative Movies:
25. Citizen Kane: Arrogant left-wing media elitist gets his comeuppance
24. Easy Rider: Plucky young entrepreneurs head off on a cross-country celebration of American freedom
23. The Godfather: A legal immigrant teaches his "extended family" the importance of loyalty and trust
22. Dr. Strangelove: or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb: Plucky American warrior fights to preserve precious bodily fluids, pays the ultimate price
21. Taxi Driver: Plucky Vietnam vet goes Chuck Norris on a pimp
20. Scarface: A legal immigrant pulls himself up by the bootstraps, succeeds in business and chases the American capitalist dream
19. E.T.: Scary government agencies torment a plucky young boy and his new friend
18. The Fly: A government-funded research boondoggle goes badly awry
17. King Kong: More rude, inhospitable New Yorkers
16. Titanic: Debunks myth of global warming
15. To Kill A Mockingbird: Liberal trial lawyer has a change of heart, goes Chuck Norris on rabid dog
14. Schindler's List: They were "Socialists," right?
13. The Wizard of Oz: Plucky red-state ingenue learns that "big government" doesn't have all the answers.
12. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest: Rugged individualist is trapped in health-care bureaucracy, menaced by domineering, ambiguous female pushing single-payer system
11. You've got Mail: Shows the free market in action, as gutsy multi-national conglomerate crushes frou-frou bookstore catering to New York's liberal elite
10. Animal House: Smarmy liberal elitist academics get their comeuppance
9. Bambi: Responsible hunters exercise Second Amendment, help environment by thinning deer herd
8. Patton: Plucky American warrior bitch-slaps liberal
7. Annie Hall: Mocks Bob Dylan, cocaine abuse, lobsters
6. Casablanca: Plucky cafe owner gets French guy to think like an American
5. Gone With the Wind: Shows the good side of slavery
4. The Searchers: Shows the "tender side" of former Confederate soldier
3. Raiders of the Lost Ark: Plucky maverick academic tangles with crazy foreigners
2. Psycho: Mother's inspiration helps beleaguered small-businessman keep family motel afloat
AND THE NO. 1 CONSERVATIVE FILM:
1. Airplane!: Why Reagan fired all the air-traffic controllers
7 - Pete Blackwell
That's just brilliant. Period.
8 - Pete Blackwell
DonnieB, are you a Blogcritic or a blogger? Your list needs more exposure than just on this comments thread. Post it.
9 - Baronius
I don't think it matters whether the band was conservative, only the lyrics. Most of Ted Nugent's songs were about his wang. He seems very proud of it, which is fine, but it's not necessarily conservative. On the other hand, it is pretty amusing that The Clash got on the list, because they'd hate it.
A lot of Rush songs dealt with the rights of the individual, and opposition to the state. "Free Will", of course. "Red Barchetta" was an anti-environmentalist song at least 20 years ahead of its time. In "2112", an individual fought state censorship. And "Passage to Bangkok" was, um, libertarian?
Every political person I've ever met loves "Won't Get Fooled Again". The lyrics read like a primer to the thought of Edmund Burke. The revolution promises change, but only brings violence.
PS - National Review did a "100 Best Conservative Movies" list in 1994. A lot of John Ford and Frank Capra. My favorite pick was "Ghostbusters", for the nerdy little bureaucrat.
10 - RogerMDillon
Other than the motor law, which we don't know why it was enacted, how is "Red Barchetta" anti-environmentalist? Peart said it was inspired by the article "A Nice Morning Drive" by Richard S. Foster; it's available online.
"Freewill" isn't about the individual vs the state. It's about people believing life's path is pre-ordained and they can't do anything about it.
11 - Matthew T. Sussman
"When a maaaan loves a woman / It's recognized by the state"
12 - Matthew T. Sussman
The Democrats song is, interestingly enough, from the Presidents of the United States of America:
"Goin' to the Congress, gonna talk about impeachment."
13 - nugget
since when was Ben Folds popular with the conservatives?
14 - Brian Gould
And why would ANYONE name drop Ben Fold Five?
I haven't seen the list myself, but is there no John Mellancamp on the list? The majority of what he writes are songs about small town family values. "Jack and Diane", "Small Town", "Pink Houses", etc... Just like putting The Clash on the list, it sure would rub 'ole Johnny Cougar raw to be on that list.
15 - Pete Blackwell
"Small Town" is number 31.
16 - Clavos
I'm a dork without rhythm who loves 40s standards, Big Band, and Swing. Who's Ben Folds? I asked my chauffer (he knows the streets), but he didn't know either.
17 - Atan
Perhaps one should check song by song:
"DER Kommissar" by ATF is a cover of the Austrian original by Falco. The lyrics are a parody on cocaine freaks in fashionable Vienna - both in the German original and the English translation.
Nothing about the East, the Commies or politics at all!
How about the rest of list? May be also as fictitious as this one?
18 - Tom
Care to name a single, right-wing Numan song? He's never sung any, as far as I'm aware.
19 - Pete Blackwell
I never said Gary Numan has "right-wing songs" per se, I said he himself is a far right-winger (unless you're calling Behind the Mucis a liar). He has many paranoid songs that could be twisted into a "conservative" meaning if one so chose. For example:
Here in my car
I feel safest of all
I can lock all my doors
It's the only way to live
A song about the crime brought on by the liberal welfare state. Or something.
20 - Brian
Most conservative song: Alice Cooper's "Dead Babies"
21 - Jeff
The article (and it's follow-up, part two) *are* available on line:
here at
nationalreview.com
and here
22 - Scott Butki
I'm going to write up my own take on this in the next few days..
That second link above has 50 More conservative songs
Sublime, Sex Pistols, Suicidal Tendencies - all conservative? Wow. Who knew?
DonnieB, that list is masterful.
23 - Guppusmaximus
J.P.#4 - Motley Crue was never Heavy Metal.
John Miller needs to get his facts straight! Slayer isn't a Death Metal band and South of Heaven is a Liberal Statement NOT Conservative. Besides "Silent Scream" which is mainly a violent description of the emotions involved in Abortion, the rest of the album goes against mindlessly following religion and explains the evil behind war including the death of youth. I think he should've listened to "The Crooked Cross"
24 - -E
Congrats! This article has been selected as one of this week’s Editors’ Picks.
25 - Pete Blackwell
Danke!