What does it mean to live a life both self-determined and selfless? When I was a child I always dreamt I would live a life where when I worked, I loved my work. I dreamt I would work in service of others… the work I would do, would bring love or peace or sustenance to the world. I dreamt the work I would do, would be of my own design. Perhaps, like my grandfather, I would own a local hardware store — a building I'd built myself — offering tools and other materials for the local workmen to get their job done.
I remember standing behind the counter of Ohmer's Hardware store in Erie, PA. The rows of shelves stuffed with dozens of varieties of hammers. More types of hammers than I could imagine uses for. Walls libraried with labeled boxes and drawers: washers, screws, bolts, nails, wrenches, and screwdrivers.
Red would enter the store, a foot taller than anyone else - the only man I knew who could look over the top of all the aisles. I remember feeling like this gave him an advantage over others who came to the hardware store. He'd survey the place and saunter up to the counter, stuff a plug of Red Man in his cheek.
“Hey, Bud.” Every one called my grandfather, Bud. His real name was Charles but not even my grandmother, even in a fit of anger, called him Charles. I'd asked around as to why this was so, but no one knew.
“You got that knew auger?” Red continued.
“The one with new fangled grip?” Bud asked. “You don't want that thing.” Bud was a bad businessman. He carried all the newest equipment, this widget and that gadget but if he thought something didn't work he told you. “That handle's bearings 'll give out or rust after just a few times out on the ice and then you have just a regular old augur like right there. Just paid 30 bucks more for it than ya needed.”
Absent mindedly Red spit on the floor. “Thanks Bud.” He said. He turned, walked casually up the aisle. The door rang a small cat bell as it clicked open and again when it closed.
After about ten years Ohmer hardware closed. I get the impression from Grandma the business was never much of a success. I'd never had noticed. The men that would gather there, their talk, their affection for my grandfather made me think that place was the center of the universe. My grandfather, knocking off his corny rhymes, corny jokes. He had no boss. He worked at the work he built. He helped others. People loved him.
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