What is that buzzing that I hear? Is it an alarm clock? Yep, it sure is! The alarm is going off signifying that The Darkness’ 15 minutes of fame is officially over. With a ridiculous album full of songs lacking much in the way of hooks or appeal, and filled with the increasingly falsetto vocals from Justin Hawkins, it’s a safe bet that The Darkness will finally go away with this album.
Since there Permission To Land surprised everyone a few years ago, this band has been compared to acts like Sweet and Thin Lizzy. Why? They have nowhere near the talent of those bands, and clearly none of the songwriting chops either. One Way Ticket To Hell…And Back, the rocking hook that lured people to this disgrace of a rock band has been stripped away. Replacing it is boring musicianship, ridiculous songs, and just layer after layer of shit designed to sit nicely and quietly under Hawkins’ retarded vocal sound. With such inspirational lyrics like “I love what you do with your hair / I really love what you do with your hair / I love love what you do with your hair” from “Knockers”, it’s apparent that they had nothing in the studio and just threw anything together before they were forgotten altogether. Overall, the lyrics are putrid, to say the least. Musically, there’s just nothing here. Where the last album featured a few cool riffs and catchy musical hooks that made you tolerate Hawkins, One Way Ticket To Hell…And Back
features none of that. They sound more like a backing track than an actual band trying to grow. Musically, The Darkness have taken three steps backward toward musical sterility – a bad trend for a band that already features a crummy singer.
Article comments
— go to most recent comments1 - Luke
You don't get why 'permission to land' was a hit? Simple, because it was a disgracefully dumb novelty band that was your guilty pleasure to listen to and remember the gay 80's hair metal bands that covered themselves in glitter and hairspray while still retaining the tough guy image with the ripped acid wash jeans and open leather jackets explosing their perfectly stylized chest hair or lack thereof, almost the exact same reason slim shadey is successful, because he's a funny dumbshit white guy, vanilla ice took himself too seriously.
2 - Matthew
Why so bitter? I've enjoyed The Darkness since their inception, and have had no regrets in listening to them. This band has proved successful in providing great music for my friends and I to jam to, whether it be in the car or in the weight room. I really don't see the point in even calling the band a "guilty pleasure", I mean who the hell would feel guilty listening to something that they like. That doesn't even make sense. Next time, please consider actually reviewing the album, instead of bashing the genre or style it is associated with. You are doing a disservice to the band and future listeners.
3 - Luke
I'll bash homoerotic hair metal as much as I like.
4 - oli
Seen the band 4 times, going for a 5th in February...Love them. To even offend by questioning their talent makes you a fool. Their last album rocked, hence it's now PLATINUM status and they will sell out for years to come. People tend to neglect the fact that whilst Hawkins is beltin out his lyrics, he's also thrashing the shit outta his guitar! An awesome band, a shit review and an even shitter reviewer. Someone has obviously got a beef with the guys!
5 - will
obviously mr. akin dislikes the darkness, so this review is biased. this album is definitely a step forward for the band. the guitar solos are some of the most creative that i have heard. i cant wait for the US tour
6 - Mark
The funny thing about this rediculously untrue review, is it will probably backfire and just inspire fans to spread the words "THE DARKNESS ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
7 - Jake
I agree that the reviewer has to be biased. I mean he refers to Justin Hawkins' vocals as "retarded", and to Hawkins himself as a "Joke Singer" any reviewer worth his salt doesn't use adjectives and name calling that expose the fact that he/she hates the artist for some other reason besides the music. I think One way ticket is a far more inspired album than the first and although the vast leap from Permission's sound surprised me at first, I got used to the new sound and found a really great album with alot of really fun songs that the band obviously took time to craft. I ask anyone who's interested in this album to check it out for yourself without Mr. Akin's review in your head.
8 - DaveyP
Well, Chris had one thing right. I would give permission to land a 10, and this album is around a 5. Granted, i've only listened to it once. But it lost all the rock appeal of permission to land, and replaced it with falsetto pop silliness. Hopefully it grows on me.
9 - luvgun
The arrival of The Darkness heralded an immense step forward in todays stale music.While the the new album might not be greeted with praise from the critics.I am more than confident these critics will conveniently forget their critisism in the future when this breath of fresh air of a band will rule the world.Talentless,tuneless arty bands who the critics favour will always be around to serve as a grey backdrop for the true shining stars.The Darkness Rock.
10 - Todd
This reviewer is a chop. With a major chip on his shoulder that appears to be blinding any sense of appretiation for genuine rock and roll.
11 - The Tollund Man
This review bites. Clearly he's a sour individual who wouldn't know a good song if it hit him in the face. The album is an atomic bomb of rock which will be hailed as a classic for years to come.
12 - JoeSchmo
I listened just now to the whole thing straight through on MySpace. In all fairness the entire album actually isn't very good. I understand what they were trying to do. A sort of synthesis of Queen and the harder, "homoerotic" '80s metal and come out with a product that was interesting. They worked with Queen's producer, Roy Thomas Baker (who at one point was working with Axl Rose on the forever-delayed Chinese Democracy, and worked with a throng of those other '80s bands), and Justin Hawkins was making a noise about being in the same studio with the same Piano that Freddie Mercury did Bohemian Rhapsody on. So he was kind of obsessing with the "past" that he was "conjuring," or whatever he thought he was doing. The point is he didn't succeed. The band didn't succeed. It came out flat; the songwriting is very simple and unimaginative. The lyrics are childish. If they were relying on campiness to hold them over, campiness apparently abandoned them. Justin Hawkins acts like a clown, but that doesn't pull together the sufficient camp to make this kind of (bad) music work. Freddie Mercury, whom he apparently was trying to copy, was actually gay. Try that for starters. You could debate the "background" to why One Way Ticket isn't a good album, but give it a listen as MySpace and you'll see it falls kind of flat. Which is a pity, since I was hoping a band with this much hype would live up to it (some bands actually have recently), but I guess not. Oh well. There is a lot of good stuff out there. I think the point is that the good stuff's new and fresh and not trying so hard to re-record something that's already been done to death. Didn't Nirvana come to wipe away all the...bad glam acts?
13 - Harrison
This album rocks socks, period.
The Darkness are fun and that's what they are all about. They enjoy what they do and are damned good at it. They put on an awesome live show and don't deserve biased reviews like this - as a reviewer your supposed to be able to appreciate an album for what it is, not what you think it should be.
14 - Your mom
Completely untalented! I mean the reviewer, not the band. The album rocks. Go [Deleted in line with BC Comments Policy], Mr. Rolling Stone wannabe.
15 - Dinner Gentleman Arms
Luke is a dick...he obviously has "knockers" and he preffers to grab his crotch (if he had any) and say "im my daddy" har har THE DARKNESS FOREVER SHALL RULE...luke and chris...have a one way ticket [Deleted in line with BlogCritics Comments Policy] back to life
16 - wick
This is not a review, it's just a bunch of bollocks from a macho loser you prefers the same rehashed rock that poisons the radio waves.
Not everyone has to like the darkness and I don't expect them too. But the real retard here is you. The only thing I'd rate 1/10 is your sense of music. I'm guessing you like MTV rock. That shit they shovel into your face that leaves nothing but a reminder of music you've heard before.
The darkness are a breath of fresh air in room full of fools who all look the same and sound the same. I bought the album yesterday and I listened to it all the way through and got into it instantly. Rarely do I listen to a cd that get's a full play through the first time, that makes time fly so fast. I haven't had that from an album in a long time.
17 - jason123
i dont know what everyones whining about its a good album, someone looks like they wroge an essay on the thing lol, i dont know if thats all true, but it sounds fancy enuf...the darkness first album permission was prolly better just cuz maybe this time they were trying too hard and i watched the new music video and i hafta say its kind of weird, but then the darkness were always a little weird right? but its pretty fun. i like it. anyway 1/10 is mean, i'd give it def more than that!
18 - mick
Ive had a listen to One way ticket on myspace, I only got as far as hazel eyes coz the palyer keeps stopping on that track. I really love the chord sequence on the titile track, its got a great hook! I feel with the tracks I did hear that the Darkness is capable to produce much better, however I really did enjoy what I heard. What I mean to say is, there are AC/DC albums I dont like all the tracks of, or Eric clapton albums wll have tracks you go "hmmmm, s'alright, I'll skip that one, thought the rest are great"
The Darkenss are a fantastic band, and its great that theyve made metal and heavy rock cool to listen to. I'll be subjecting my passengers in my taxi to this album very soon!!!
19 - Dave_Lad
Bought the album yesterday. I'd already heard it on the MTV website, thinking "not bad - not as good as the first one".
Anyway, sat down, put it on - listened to the whole thing in one sitting. Absolutely incredible. I don't know what it was, but it just grew on me in like a second.
Justin Hawkins - "joke voice"? I think not. I'm a singer myself, and hitting those notes takes a lot more than a "retard" could manage (That sounded bad - sorry. You know what I mean).
The Darkness made music interesting again - long may they continue this trend.
20 - dan
I like when people say joke lyrics and the singer acts like a clown. IT'S ROCK & ROLL, its supposed to be about nothing.... Van Halen is one of the greatest rock bands ever and did David Lee Roth ever write about anything important.. No, it just rocks, and so does this album.. I think Hawkins has the best voice in rock today and im glad to finally here a decent guitar solo
21 - Jack Carter
Blah blah blah... "Critics" likie Chris Akin said the same thing about Marillion 25 years ago, a band that thrives in spite of being hated by the music press.
The careers of The Darkness will outlast that of Chris Akins.
Nuff said.
22 - Bird
This is Darkness best album to date!!!! There are things on this album to like. There are things that are a little stupid. What's wrong with Great Music for the sake of Great Music??? Hated the first album, can't get enough of this one... but hey, I also love Queen so sue me....
23 - Kyel
This album, while not quite up to the snuff of 'Permission to Land', is kickass - how can you not love the coke-snortin' intro to the title track? And the notes Justin hits in the chorus of 'Knockers' could shatter windows - as guitarist/singer, I'd love to see either of the two bums who say this albums is a "1" hit a note above normal speech. Go see these lads live and you'll understand why they ROCK out.
24 - Sam
What are you saying! the darkness rock and u know it! You vill change zis review
25 - Sam
i no where u live joe tidbury