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Movie Review: The Human Centipede (2009)

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Do you think that Tom Six lost a bet or made this film for irony’s sake? If you haven’t seen his previous work you won’t understand but let’s start by saying his films are bad; so bad in fact that there is a high chance that someone might have told him that they were shit and he may have responded with something along the lines of eat shit… See where I’m going here? I myself I have not watched all of them, I once watched twenty minutes of Gay in Amsterdam and I wanted to bludgeon myself with a large hefty blunt object. Why would I need to see the others when IMDb tells me practically no-one thought they were good.

You must know what the film is about, if you haven’t where have you been all this time? The plot concerns Doctor … whose lifelong dream is to make a human centipede. I won’t detail what exactly that means that’s what pictures are for.

The Human Centipede has now gained a cult following from extremely devoted horror fans because of its disgusting premise; it’s even won awards for its “courage” but is it really a modern day classic? Or is it just a run of the mill horror film masquerading as something unique and original? I am more inclined to believe the latter statement, let me explain.

The premise is a clever guise for a rather boring and lacklustre horror film, but only some people it seems can see through this. It ends up just being a incredibly dull and predictable film that bends to the will of formula, think of any mad scientist film and compare it to this and they are the same. There are little hints of black humour scattered around but there are not nearly enough to make it stop taking itself seriously, with an addition of more black humour it could have saved itself from ridicule.

Ironically, the part of this film that made me feel disgusting is when one of the American girls has the IV drip ripped out of her arm, I don’t think this movie really did its job now did it? I can’t help but think that those who have called it the “sickest film ever made” should be forced to sit through a marathon of I Spit on your Grave, August Underground: Mordum, Salo or 30 Days of Sodom, Audition and Eraserhead, then they might learn the meaning of sick and twisted.

This film will not be forgotten I place a pretty safe bet with that one, its premise will live on through the ages but as for the film itself. Curiosity will drag you in and this is why people hate curiosity, but here it’s for completely different reasons.

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3.0/10
It dangles a horrific premise in front of your face it gives you the idea that this film is the most disgusting and most vile film on the planet but then you figure out that this is all a bluff because it is just a very generic horror film. Oh and before you say anything I shotgun front.

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About aidanphantom

  • Jordan Richardson

    Haha, nice review. I’ve been meaning to check this out for pure shits and giggles, but it seems like you’ve saved me the trouble.

    As for sick movies, it’s hard to beat Guinea Pig 2: Flowers of Flesh and Blood or the August Underground shit. Yeeech.