Cherry-flavored panties, take a hike. Edible Fashion is going mainstream! McDonald’s Corporation today announced the test release of a new line of breakfast clothing, starting with their flagship product, the Egg McMitten.
“You’ve probably noticed over the years that I have a flair for fashion,” said company executive R. McDonald. “I finally decided to let my inner fry fly and put a whole new spin on what‘s hot!”
With the introduction of the Egg McMitten, consumers will be able to wear their food and eat it, too. “It was Hamburglar who first suggested it. But Mayor McCheese was the real inspiration,” said McDonald. “I mean, just look at his wardrobe. Genius, pure genius!”
McDonald’s has always done a good job of capturing market share, pushing the envelope with fast food’s first forays into the breakfast hours. But good was apparently not good enough.
“We realized a lot of time is wasted by consumers in the process of getting dressed,” continued McDonald. “Those minutes could be spent in our drive-thru. Why not eat and dress at the same time?”
The Egg McMitten will be available in just two flavors initially—Mocha Mitt and Gloveberry. A third flavor had been planned until third-party trademark negotiations apparently broke down. A spokesman from the Butterfinger Company declined comment.