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Marilyn suicidal, no. Wacky, yes.

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The Marilyn Monroe transcript printed in the Los Angeles Times a few days ago leaves the impression that Marilyn had zero plans to commit suicide.

In fact, she comes across as nothing more than one of those wacky wealthy celebrity types with not much to worry about except the science of the day, psychology, Freud in particular, orgasms or the lack of in her case, lesbian affairs, her dalliances with men, the joys of enemas, spankings, how she couldn’t tell Bobby it was over, and the way she looked – “My breasts are beginning to sag a bit. … My waist isn’t bad. My ass is what it should be, the best there is. Legs, knees and ankles still shapely. And my feet are not too big. OK, Marilyn, you have it all there. It is decision time.”

She also was fond of the F-word, which was represented throughout the text with ellipses.

She comes across as arrogant during her “free associating” session with a tape recorder. “Dear Doctor,” she starts, addressing her psychologist, Ralph Greenson, whom she’s obviously flirting with throughout. She thinks that her idea of free association (a Freudian technique for uncovering memories by letting the patient say whatever pops into their mind) into a recorder is such a good one that she “offers” it to her shrink as a revelation.

“What can I give you. Not money. I know that from me that means nothing to you. Not my body. I know your professional ethics and faithfulness to your wonderful wife make that impossible. What I am going to give you is my idea that will revolutionize psychoanalysis.”

The funny and ironic part about the transcript is that the sexually-charged beauty that she was had to fake her own orgasms until the doctor told her how.

You said there was an obstacle in my mind that prevented me from having an orgasm; that it was something that happened early in my life about which I felt so guilty that I did not deserve to have the greatest pleasure there is; that it had to do with something sexual that was very wrong, but my getting pleasure from it caused my guilt That it was buried in my unconscious. Through analysis we would bring it to my conscious mind where we could get to the guilt and free me to be orgasmic. Well, we sure worked it and got nowhere. I’d go home and cry and vomit from the frustration. Then you said for the orgasm problem we’ll try a different approach. That you would tell me how to stimulate myself, that when I did exactly what you told me to do I would have an orgasm and that after I did it to myself and felt what it was, I would have orgasms with lovers. What a difference a word makes. You said I would, not I could.
Bless you, Doctor. What you say is gospel to me. By now I’ve had lots of orgasms. Not only one, but 2 and 3 with a man who takes his time.

And later in the text:

Speaking of Oscars, I would win overwhelmingly if the Academy gave an Oscar for faking orgasms. I have done some of my best acting convincing my partners I was in the throes of ecstasy. If he were alive I’d have Johnny Hyde be the presenter. …Johnny Hyde was special. He wasn’t a lot to look at. A little shrimp. Little shrimp, is that redundant or tautological. I always get them mixed up. Anyway, he only came up to my chin.

But moreover, the transcript shows she had ambitions:

I’ll take a year of day and night study of Shakespeare with Lee Strasberg. I’ll pay him to work only with me. He said I could do Shakespeare. I’ll make him prove it. That will give me the basics Olivier wanted. Then I’ll go to Olivier for the help he promised. And I’ll pay whatever he wants. Then I’ll produce and act in the Marilyn Monroe Shakespeare Film Festival which will put his major plays on film. I’ll need you to keep me together for a year or more. I’ll pay you to be your only patient. Oh, I made you another present. I have thrown all my … pills in the toilet. You see how serious I am about this. I’ve read all of Shakespeare and practiced a lot of lines. I won’t have to worry about the scripts. I’ll have the greatest script writer who ever lived working for me and I don’t have to pay him. Oh, Monroe will have her hand in. I am going to do Juliet first. Don’t laugh. What with what make-up, costume and camera can do, my acting will create a Juliet who is 14, an innocent virgin, but whose budding womanhood is fantastically sexy. I’ve some wonderful ideas for Lady Macbeth and Queen Gertrude. I feel certain I’ll win an Oscar for one or more of my Shakespearean women.

She ends: “What is amazing is I solved my problem just through the free associating I did for you. …

Well, that’s something for you to sleep on, Doctor.

Good Night.”

Read the accompanying story here.

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