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Making Love in Pakistan: An Introduction

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Some thinking people scoff at the absurdity of St. Valentine's Day, but they do not need to. There is no Red Heart Revolution under way in Islamabad. Roses are not likely to be exchanged in Waziristan hamlets. Occasional lovers will continue to confront harrowing times in the rural regions of Sindh province. Brothers will not fail to keep a strict eye on their college-going sisters in the town of Multan.

Besides, there are sad rumors of Benazir Bhutto's 20-years-old marriage with Asif Zardari being on the verge of collapse.

No February mood this, yet spring is not far. Perhaps, even as you are reading this line, someone, somewhere is making plans in Rawalpindi. A card is waiting to be sold. A flower is waiting to be plucked.

Pakistan is said to be a conservative country, but has that ever restrained the passions of growing kids? Pimpled people, be they in Kansas or Karachi, are driven by the same substance – hormones. No matter what their religion or nationality, they all close eyes when Roberta Flack swoons “Killing Me Softly With His Song.” They all feel Julia Roberts's disappointment each time they watch her watching her best friend's wedding. Love and sex remains a combustible mix for all times and all societies.

In the past few days, I tried to probe into the mixed-sex dynamics of the country. Do youngsters date in Pakistan? Where are the meeting places in cities like Lahore and Karachi? What role does Islam play in shaping their romantic lives? How is the conflict between the Old and the New handled?

In trying to get a glimpse into the modern life of this nation, I held conversations with many young Pakistanis, both men and women. I listened to their stories and intend to share with Blogcritics readers. While these people do not represent the entire country, their views are important. They, too, are a part of what makes up Pakistan.

Pakistan Paindabad – Long live Pakistan.

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About Mayank Austen Soofi

  • Indeed Pakistan IS inhabited by Humans and is not at all bad as is advertised by our own local media and CNN type international media there are lovers loved ones and all the things sweet.

    Youngsters may be frusted due to brain wash of media but I am sure when people leave Pakistan thy miss all te sweetness of relations the smell the clean air and best of all the very simplesity of the things.

    Pakistan has a very poor aproach towards media as our leaders in the quest of promoting themselves let media do what ever fith they (media) wants our leadership is the problem not the country.

  • Nancy

    There’s obviously the same emotions driving people in Pakistan/India as in the west, since there are so many people there. Additional evidence is supplied by the overwhelming romanticism of so many Bollywood movies. But we in the west still have to ask, in societies where mixed-gender mingling is not really encouraged – & in a good many places not allowed at all – where DOES ‘romance’ come in, especially when one isn’t allowed to date before marriage, usually arranged, and to a stranger? I’ll be interested to hear about this, Mayank.

  • Mayank Austen Soofi

    Nancy, you have a very interesting curiosity which I will have difficulty in responding to. I feel since something as basic as love is suppressed so much in India and Pakistan, it acquires a larger-than-life aura in our fantasy world. We are denied this in the real world, and so we dream about it all the time. Unlike in the West, songs in South Asia are almost always about everlasting love, broken hearts or about love still unrequited.

    Isn’t it usual to desperately desire those things which we do not possess, can not possess?

  • Shahid

    Hey I didn’t come in this forum for fun, I just came here to realize everyone that Pakistan is in need of your support now.
    So, whatever you do now a days just remember Pakistan and do it with full devotion. If you are in abroad always send money through Banks to decrease little bit economic crisis in Pakistan. If you are business man try to invest in Pakistan although you will get little share but its your country, its our country.
    Even if you are in any field always remember Pakistan, because its our country we have to keep it strong and safe.
    Because always remember we are recognized as Pakistani.
    Hope you will follow to make Pakistan stable, stronger and beautiful country of the World.

  • raheel


  • having lived in canada and then moving back to Karachi .. i have learned one thing pakistani people are really passionate about love and romanticism although our adults are not comfortable with inter gender mingling is on the rise and people feel strongly about showing their emotions and letting it rip

  • Ensorcelled Reader

    Pimpled people, be they in Kansas or Karachi, are driven by the same substance – hormones.

    Your blogs are amazingly captivating. This is the 70th I’m reading.And I just cannot seem to stop.