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London’s Falling… For The Pats! LOL!!!4

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'Allo, Govna! Sweep ya chimney for ya?

BOLLOCKS!

Apparently the New England Patriots are playing an “away game” against the Tampa Bay Suckaneers in London this Sunday. Gotta say, as a diehard Pats fan I didn’t even realize they were gonna be out of the country this weekend. Way to promote your overseas events, NFL.

I remember the last time I watched a London NFL game was 2007 when the Giants squeaked by the bloody Dolphins. It was all just a pregame before Game 4 of the 2007 World Series. I was up in Bangor, Maine at my aunt and uncle’s house watching it on their giant flat-screen, counting down the hours to our second World Series title in four years. Haven’t been back to Maine since. I miss it, but I miss that feeling of excitement before a World Series more. (Wahhh! Why can’t the Red Sox be champions every year!) I am a little excited for the October Classic this year, but mostly to see the Phillies squash the Yanks. I’ve got family and friends in the Philly area and I wouldn’t mind seeing them win back-to-back titles if it meant A-Rod cry hot androstenedione-laced tears of the despair, while Ryan Howard cries hot androstenedione-laced tears of joy.

After playing about 30 undefeated teams in a row, the Pats now have back-to-back winless opponents. The 59-0 Tennessee thumping was nice, but the Bucs game could be even worse. It’ll be the worst beating the British have seen since The Blitz. (Zinged ya, ya wankers!)

I love how this is a home game for Tampa Bay. British Buccaneer fans will be out in full force on Sunday! But, to be fair to the Bucs; we are still winless on the road. But I can safely say we have NEVER lost a game at Wembley Stadium.

Going back to 2008, Tampa Bay has lost an admirable ten games in a row. Lions fans scoff at this puny feat. When I attended John Bapst Memorial High School, our football team went almost three years without a win. I think that squad could take the Bucs this season.

I realize that the people of Great Britain are emotionally racked that former Buc/Patriot Joey Galloway won’t be playing on Sunday; but Brits, don’t jump off that bridge that keeps falling down just yet, Godkowski will be in attendance. I just hope Man U. doesn’t try to sign him while he’s over there.

Forecast: I don’t see the Buccaneers coming anywhere close to winning this one. Back-to-back goose eggs seems more than likely. Unless the Bucs can run for about five hundred yards..

Prediction:
New England 57 Tampa Bay 0

MVP: LB – Jerod Mayo: Mayo’s “I’m back” game. He’s been playing well since returning from injury but he needs one big game to re-stake his claim as defensive quarterback of the Belichick Bunch. A couple picks and a couple sacks will put him well on his way.

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About Ethan Booker

  • http://www.futonreport.net/ Matthew T. Sussman

    You’d think they’d schedule the Steelers-Vikings in London. Big Ben vs. The Queen.

  • http://lowposts.com/ ebooker

    No good. Everybody would just end up calling Hines Ward “Paki”..

  • http://www.futonreport.net/ Matthew T. Sussman

    In the hierarchical racist chain, Boston always has the leg up on England. And England has Spain. And Spain has … some really amazing architecture.

  • http://lowposts.com/ ebooker

    Boston, Massachusetts: Beating England at tea-tossing & slur-tossing since 1773.

  • http://www.sarcastiholic.com Sarcastiholic

    It’s true. Spain has some really amazing architecture.

  • http://drdreadful.blogspot.com Dr Dreadful

    “When I attended John Bapst Memorial High School, our football team went almost three years without a win.

    So the ‘Memorial’ part was to ensure that the school hadn’t completely forgotten how to win?

    “Godkowski will be in attendance. I just hope Man U. doesn’t try to sign him while he’s over there.”

    You jest, but remember that the people who own the Buccaneers also own Manchester United…

  • http://lowposts.com/ ebooker

    @DD: We always had a moment of silence before every game to honor the foreign concept of victory..

    Shoot, I forgot about that. Gonna have to capture Godkowski and hold him in my basement Celtic Pride-style ’til this all blows over..

  • Grampie Bob

    Didn’t the Sox try to play a game in England in 2007 – then take two months to get over the jetlag? Great thing to do to your team in the middle of a battle for a playoff spot.

  • http://drdreadful.blogspot.com Dr Dreadful

    You know, there was a time when some people thought baseball might actually take off in England.

    A Victorian iron foundry owner named Sir Francis Ley was a fan of the game and had a stadium built in the Midlands city of Derby. Sadly for him, the sport never caught on and so he leased the stadium to a local soccer team.

    Derby County Football Club, twice champions of England during the 1970s, played their home games at The Baseball Ground for over 100 years!

  • http://lowposts.com/ ebooker

    @Bob: Bye weeks for both teams to recover after this week..