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Live Music Reviews: My Eurovision 2013 Top Five Performances

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Eurovision has ended for another year and yet again I questioned why I watched it, as I do the Sunday after the contest every year. It is a yearly battle with good taste, good music and musical sanity, which I inevitably lose. Every year I find myself, drink in hand, with friends and/or family, sitting down to watch it in a mixture of keen anticipation and horror—much like the Finance Ministers of the participating countries, I suspect.

Anyway, after all those caveats and excuses, I give you my top five Eurovision entries for this year. If you wish to go watch the entire thing before you read this, here is the link to an archive of the amazing spectacle put on by the Swedes. I’ll wait…

5. Desmond Child, songwriter of hits for Kiss, Bon Jovi and loads of other people, penned the entry for the UK, called “Believe in Me”, which was performed by Bonnie Tyler. The track seemed rather out of place as it is country and smacks of something that Taylor Swift or Faith Hill could do full justice to. Shove a few more fiddles in and it has “country hit” written all over it.

4. For sheer bravado and in-your-face attitude, Finland’s entry “Marry Me” deserves a mention. It was twee Euro-pop but the wedding motif was amusing and the girl-on-girl kiss at the end raised the ire (and other things) of many.

3. While not the edgiest song, Russia’s entry was a hopeful ballad called “What If”, performed brilliantly by a lovely singer, Dina Garipova. No doubt this song, even with its audience participation lyric backdrop, succumbed to politics and didn’t do as well as it should.

2. The goth and electronica fans have a new track to dance to with the enthralling and slightly creepy “I Feed You My Love” from Norway. Allowed to be as dark as I think it is meant to be, it could be hit at goth clubs all over. Ambiguous lyrics make it one of the most interesting songs in the competition.

1. And finally a song that did far worse than it deserved was Iceland’s power ballad “Eg A Lif”. Sung by a bloke who looked like he just got off a Viking longship (Eythor Ingi), it was a perfect Nordic metal power-ballad material, if the obvious guitar solo in middle eight that was missing was put back in. The bloke doing the singing has just gotten a gig with one of the Iceland’s most popular prog bands. This was the unanimous choice in the Dodge household if we got a vote.

Honorable mentions go to the batty Romanian entry “It’s My Life” with its Vlad the Impaler-meets-Twilight with a touch of Freddie Mercury with a touch of Lloyd-Webber stage show and singing. Lordi Eurovision-style it wasn’t quite but it still riled the purists.

Derision goes to all the entries who were off-key, flat or, in the case of Spain, sounded as if she were a reject from American Idol.

I would claim that never again shall I put myself through it, but we all know that would be a lie.

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