Friday , March 29 2024
How dare you men not luxuriate in the cuteness of a baby, my baby to be specific?

Infantism

Yet another form of “ism” that I have been running into lately – with very few exceptions, these vile acts of prejudice seem to be predominantly displayed by men.

Look at that face, that grin, that drool – how can you men not just lose your mind?

Just the other night, I was at my in-laws, two individuals known for their fair and balanced displays of affection and attention to both the young and old. But not on this night: while my mother-in-law, a woman of discriminating taste, was remarking on how incredibly handsome and cute her young grandson, Alex, was, my father-in-law barely turned his eye towards the comely ward.

This is not the first time such outward signs of preferential treatment have been displayed by a male member of the species. In fact, I find that while I am pointing out the more distinctive and attractive features of my newest gift to the world, that many a male in the vicinity can’t be bothered to raise their eyes from their sports page to notice.

Even in a crowd of parents, which one would assume a captive audience for appreciating the young, not ONE father came up to me to ask how the young man was, or even to state his obvious aesthetic superiority. But not surprisingly, many a female was drawn to this cherubic features and showered him with glorious praises on high – so much so that I had to beat them back with sticks.

Even when I take a trip to my local merchants and have the pulchritudinous boy on full display, it is only the ladies who seem to be able to fully appreciate his gift for spreading the “toothless grin” joy.

Perhaps there is some cultural, genetic or evolutionary factor behind all this malevolent indifference. I suppose it’s the female genetic makeup to find all things small to be irresistibly cute. Is it the helplessness of the small and cuddly that we ladies fall victim to? I thought men were supposed to dig that silly “helplessness” shit that some women are so good at displaying. So why is it when a little baby, kitten, puppy, worm (anything small is cute, well almost anything) puts its defenseless aura up for appreciation, you men just seem oblivious?

Assholes!

In any case, I am keeping track of this mistreatment and I may be forced to contact my local ACLU for legal remedies.

About Dawn Olsen

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