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I Have to Get This Off My Chest

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I swear I wasn’t going to mention this. It’s show-offy, self-promotiony, you know: look at me, I’m psychic. But there it is. It’s out.

I’m psychic.

Now you know.

I’m telling you this because the next time I feel one of these things come over me, we can maybe get a little pool started? You know. For kids.

Here was my prediction that I originally published in “CW Predicts,” a blog I got up and running and deserted shortly after predicting real poverty if I didn’t get my ass in gear and sell something. Which I did.

This is what my soul brought in. And keep in mind, this was published before Dean’s famous scream on January 20, 2004.

Howard Dean to Spontaneously Explode
[ Tue Dec 30, 12:53:16 AM | Curtis Fisher [ CW Predicts ]

You heard it here first. The political career of presidential candidate Howard Dean — beloved by a few thousand webbies and millions of sheep who still haven’t heard him say anything out loud — will end abruptly during a debate with… what appears to be …seven… dwarfs? Could that be right? Oh, these visions! You know how weird they can be. CW thinks Dr. Dean will be debating fellow democrats when he sadly blows. He will get all over everybody.

This being a prediction, I’m under no obligation to explain my vision — which is metaphorical, thank God — except to say it’s a strong vision, and I’d put money on it if I had any. Stuck as I am in the middle of this miraculous economic recovery we’re all experiencing has me busy making room for all the cash I will no doubt soon have.

What do you think?

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About CW Fisher

  • Joe

    Excellent! Can you tell me where I left my keys?

  • I can only predict you will find your keys, then lose them, then find them again, in an endless checkerboard of finding and losing for the rest of your life, Joe, until you get down to business, work on your organizational skills, personal habits and daily routines. Pay more attention to the little things, Joe, and the big things will take care of themselves. And yes, you WILL take on that kitchen remodeling project! And you’ll hire somebody who’s related to you, I’m seeing a brother in law? Big mistake, Joe. In-law blood is thin as fish blood. Chuck him. Send ten bucks and I’ll keep talking. CW

  • Another blogging candidate to take over for Miss Cleo. Get the 800 number before they are all gone.

  • TDavid, I predicted you’d say that. You have a deep resentment toward people who refer to themselves as “creative.” This summer you will stumble on a worm and help defuse a major computer virus. Your fame and influence will spread like I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter. Two bucks. CW

  • Eric Olsen

    I too am psychic, but mine isn’t very fun or helpful. I have “shared in the experience” when close relatives have died. Other than the hope that I have somehow eased their suffering by sharing it, this is more burden than anything. Would that I could predict lottery numbers, bend spoons for fun and profit or otherwise rig the space-time continuum in amusing or rewarding ways.

  • Eric, spoon-bending just got me in trouble. I had stains all over my pants. There’s a 2-4 week window after somebody dies when it seems like they’re always hanging around me with messages similar to those you might get from people talking to you through glass in a different language. Usually they’re saying thing like “it’s on the dresser!” Or reporting the weather — freedom from gravity is something they enjoy. And they always want a cigarette. I usually keep these things to myself, at least until I check out the dresser.

  • LOL “Curt”, sorry, you don’t make the cut.

    You should know that Libras are creative by nature! How can I hate in others that is part of myself? I love creativity 😉


  • TRex, sometimes the things that seem least true are the very things we need to work on. I didn’t mean to imply you’re not creative — you are extremely creative — but you are also disciplined, and many creative people, in your view, are not. And it irks you. How’m I doin? CW

  • TRex? LOL I agree with that part anyway. Big wide-jawed, hungry creatures that we’re wiped out only by the force of an asteroid.


  • Eric Olsen

    but came back to form a glam-rock band before being wiped out again

  • There’s that darn music angle again! LOL.

  • Eric Olsen

    Bang a gong, get it on.

  • Dwaine AKA Scooter AKA D.J.

    CW Fisher.

    If you are really psychic you would know my age and the city I live in. You would know everything about me. What type of car I drive, If I even have a car, my height, weight and many other things. But I know you are not psychic and you only posted this because you were bored and wanted to pass the time.

  • Dew

    Hey Joe, your keys are in the last place you will look…

  • Joe

    Thanks, CW and Dew, very helpful. And thank you to everyone else who resisted the urge to tell me that if they were up my ass, I’d know.

  • duane

    I have discovered that the best way to find something is to first determine all the places where it’s not. This is less frustrating than simply looking for something and not finding it. By eliminating possible locations, it feels like you’re making progress. See? It’s all in the attitude. Lost your keys? Look in the bathtub. Not there? Great! There’s one more place that you know your keys aren’t! Try it today!