My definition of a free society is a society where it is safe to be unpopular.
Adlai E. Stevenson Jr., Speech in Detroit, 7 Oct. 1952
[Y]our mother was a hamster & your father smelt of elderberrys!
Monty Python & The Holy Grail
Does freedom offend you as it does me? Lets hope so. After all, if you live in this society, you are likely offended each and every day.
Maybe it was the guy in the car next to you blasting acid rock music to everyone within a 20 block radius. Perhaps it was some religious kook who tried to hand you some kind of religious pamphlet on the street.
One way or another, all those losers have chosen to inconvenience you in some way. They want to sell you something or show you something or disagree with you on something, or any one of a million “somethings” that suits them and annoys you. Who are they, losers that they are, to waste your precious time?
In the United States, its a chronic problem. On a personal note, I could get to work much faster (45 minutes as opposed to 1 hour and 15 minutes) if everyone would either just learn to drive or get out of my way!
So, I have to ask… Is freedom really all it’s cracked up to be? Perhaps we could scale back just a bit to make this society a more civil, and civilized, place to live.
I think we should follow this guideline:
If it offends, get rid of it!
So, if we see offensive religious displays, they should be taken down. If a newspaper publishes offensive material, or if a radio/TV broadcasts offensive material, it should be shut down. If some kooky religious group organizes a march on an issue that offends people, they should be arrested!
I think what might be appropriate is the establishment of a group that I will call the “Civil Patrol.” The Civil Patrol (CP for short), will have as their primary responsibility the cleanup of this offensive society. Any citizen that sees something offensive can go to the CP and lodge a complaint and the CP will follow-up within 24 hours to assess the level of offense and to issue a ruling.
Where did I get this great idea? Well, I’ve been hearing people complain for years now that they are offended by things such as religious symbols worn in public, radio and TV commentary, and other outrageous elements of this society. And since the First Amendment mandates that the government should minimize, even eliminate, offensive material, such as the Ten Commandments from public places, or religious t-shirts in schools, it makes sense to formalize the whole arrangement and empower the state to get rid of the garbage… Don’t you think!
Just nod your heads and we’ll move on. Thanks!
What? You have concerns about First Amendment freedoms? But the First Amendment, as everyone seems to indicate, really was created to allow the federal government to put controls on religion and other offensive behavior, right?
Original intent? What in the world are you talking about?! Who cares what the framers of the Constitution intended! They were all slave owners and suppressors of women. LOSERS!!!!!! Really, a bunch of hypocrites one and all. We don’t care about original intent, we care only about our intent… right?
Again, just nod your heads.
The First Amendment was created to eliminate all offenses from a society. That is what we need to insist upon and that is what we must act upon. I don’t care if you say that the First Amendment was more about insuring the opposite, it has no relevance to what we want today.
Today, we don’t want to be bothered by religious values; therefore, we need to use the First Amendment to put the necessary controls on kooky religious folk. No, you can’t pray before your meal in a restaurant, you might offend someone. No, you can’t talk to someone about Jesus at the football game, it doesn’t go with beer and hot dogs. And absolutely no way can your sons and daughters pray with friends before a high school game!
Does that make sense? Good, now lets talk about this “waterfront” property I’ve been trying to sell for the past few years…
David FlanaganPowered by Sidelines