Friday , March 29 2024

Hitchens Gloats

I have felt such kinship and respect for Christopher Hitchens since 9/11 that I may decide to hate Bill Clinton and Henry Kissinger as much as he does – I may start smoking, and take up heavy drinking again also. Or maybe I’ll just enjoy him gloating a bit:

    So it turns out that all the slogans of the anti-war movement were right after all. And their demands were just. “No War on Iraq,” they said – and there wasn’t a war on Iraq. Indeed, there was barely a “war” at all. “No Blood for Oil,” they cried, and the oil wealth of Iraq has been duly rescued from attempted sabotage with scarcely a drop spilled. Of the nine oil wells set ablaze by the few desperadoes who obeyed the order, only one is still burning and the rest have been capped and doused without casualties. “Stop the War” was the call. And the “war” is indeed stopping. That’s not such a bad record. An earlier anti-war demand – “Give the Inspectors More Time” – was also very prescient and is also about to be fulfilled in exquisite detail.

    ….What else? Oh yes, the Arab street did finally detonate, just as the peace movement said it would. You can see the Baghdad and Basra and Karbala streets filling up like anything, just by snapping on your television. And the confrontation with Saddam Hussein did lead to a surge in terrorism, with suicide bombers and a black-shirted youth movement answering his call. As could also have been predicted, those determined to die are now dead. We were told that Baghdad would become another Stalingrad – which it has. Just as in Stalingrad in 1953, all the statues and portraits of the heroic leader have been torn down.

    ….We should celebrate our common ground as well as the gorgeous mosaic of our diversity. The next mass mobilization called by International ANSWER and the stop-the-war coalition is only a few days away. I already have my calendar ringed for the date. This time, I am really going to be there. It is not a time to keep silent. Let our voices be heard. All of this has been done in my name, and I feel like bearing witness. [Slate]

Somebody say “Amen.” Hee hee.

UPDATE
Our own David Hogberg works in a similar vein:

    TO: International Committee for Peace and Justice, International Committee for Justice and Peace, and the rest of you

    FROM: The Committee

    Unfortunately since the last memo, the war has gone much worse than we had hoped. The allies war-mongering imperialists have captured Baghdad, Iraqis are cheering in the street, and the United Nations has been discredited. The heat will be on from the press, but also possibly from the pro-war crowd Bush brown-shirts. Yet there are still many skillful ways to answer the inevitable questions. Below are suggested responses.

    Question: Do you feel foolish about predicting a quagmire?

    Response: Well, there is still the occupation of Iraq, which will be difficult, not to mention the anger the rest of the world feels toward us. It will inspire countless acts of terrorism against the U.S…..

About Eric Olsen

Career media professional and serial entrepreneur Eric Olsen flung himself into the paranormal world in 2012, creating the America's Most Haunted brand and co-authoring the award-winning America's Most Haunted book, published by Berkley/Penguin in Sept, 2014. Olsen is co-host of the nationally syndicated broadcast and Internet radio talk show After Hours AM; his entertaining and informative America's Most Haunted website and social media outlets are must-reads: Twitter@amhaunted, Facebook.com/amhaunted, Pinterest America's Most Haunted. Olsen is also guitarist/singer for popular and wildly eclectic Cleveland cover band The Props.

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