By now I am sure that every Grand Theft Auto fan, or any person who has a TV, knows about “Hot Coffee”. If you don’t, you’re a moron. Just joking. Some would say, “She’s fourteen! She shouldn’t know about this type of stuff!” Adults need to learn, we pretty much get the sex talk at the age of ten from the TV. And it comes out better that way too. For those who don’t know about “Hot Coffee”, I can proudly tell you ALL about it. I have been following this damn thing since it was first a rumor and I’m proud to say it.
The “Hot Coffee” scandal is a hidden mini game that was put behind “walls” in the GTA: San Andreas coding. Why, you ask? Simple. It’s a sex mini-game. Many of you are gasping at this, but what do you expect from Rockstar? A mini-game where you capture monkeys with a little pink net? I don’t think so. That’s more of a Metal Gear 3 type of thing. G4TV was one of the first networks to actually go and seek the mini-game, and they actually found it. Believe me, they show the clip all the time. Now this isn’t the God of War type of Sex. It shows ALL, or whatever is behind the little black bar on TV. The mini-game is activated by getting a specific mod and tweaking a few things in the code. It can be accessed by taking your girlfriend back to the house, where she invites you in for hot coffee. After this, I couldn’t stop snickering everytime I hear someone say coffee. When she invites you in, well, it involves oral sex and synchronized button pushing.
Enough said on that. Why do I bring up this horrible moment in gaming? Why oh why? Stop whining, for god’s sake, you moron. Sorry, had a moment. I’m a gamer and future game designer, and when something like this gets challenged by Hillary Clinton and politicians, you get worried. The damage it could do to future games could be massive, even forcing developers to cut down on violence and everything that causes a game to be rated Mature. Another thing: some old lady is suing because of this. She states that she had no clue what was in the game when she bought it for her grandson and is outraged that there is a sex mini-game in this! Apparently, prostitutes and shooting cops doesn’t bother her. Fun grandma.
This whole conflict is a product of a whole bunch of small things adding up to this massive problem. First off, the parents are partially to blame. They say that games like this are allowing children to access pornography, but there are two things wrong with that. One, if that were true, then it would be an Adult Only game or Mature. Two, if the parents are going to buy these Mature games for their kids, they need to know what’s in them.
It’s a parent’s obligation to know what’s in their kids’ games and know when NOT to buy them. Another problem is that these politicians are getting angry at these developers for having this game in the coding, but it was cut. It was placed behind a wall so NO ONE was to get a hold of it. So the public shouldn’t be even accessing this, much less getting into the coding of the game.
Though we can’t know the outcome of what will happen to games, continue to fight for them! If politicians try to take games down, like Bush was rumored to want to destroy anime, then I suggest molotovs and Desert Eagles. Though swords do work nicely.